Thursday, January 15, 2015

Second Verse, Same As The First

To the fans of the Indianpolis Colts as well as to our fellow bloggers and sportswriters in the Indianpolis area:


We at Dan Shaughnessy Watch have been waiting for this column for four days. The sun will rise, the sun will set, and when the Patriots are in the playoffs, Shank will write a column designed to piss off as many people as possible. And today, he delivers once again.

Feel free to scroll down to other recent Dan Shaughnessy Watch posts, where we've documented this fourth-degree black belt in trolling, which he's successfully developed in his thirty-three year career at the Boston Globe, and how he successfully trolled all of you in the past. More on that in a moment while we sample today's wares:
We respect the Indianapolis Colts. They’re a solid organization with a smart, classy coach and one of the finest young quarterbacks in NFL history. The Colts have great helmets, and they play in a beautiful indoor stadium in the heart of one of America’s most underrated cities. They pummeled the vaunted Broncos, in Denver, to qualify for the AFC Championship game.

There. So much for the compulsories.
So, he's bullshitting you right off the bat - Clue #1...
Now let’s get it over with and say what everyone, everywhere in football America is saying and/or thinking.
He's lying to you again - Clue #2...
Sorry. I know the fanboys don’t like to hear this and I will be accused of recycling thoughts from previous years (when the themes change, the thoughts will change, promise), but everybody who is remotely paying attention knows what is going to happen.
This is not an accusation - it is well established, irrrefutable fact - Clue #3...

Also note that comments to this perennial shit-stirring column are closed, which has been happening with greater frequency in the past few weeks and months - Clue #4...

Coach Hoodie recognizes the demon of overconfidence.
And Shank's going the other way on purpose, just to piss you off. Don't bite on it. If you'd like, you can drop him a quick e-mail and tell him to fuck off go pound sand, asshole tell him how much you appreciate his thoughts.

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