pulls off the twofer, jumping on the Patriot's bandwagon:
ANYWHERE BUT HOUSTON — Last year, this was fun. The Houston Texans were 11-1 when they came to Foxborough. They were the Next Big Thing in the NFL. They were a team on the rise playing on “Monday Night Football” against a once-great franchise going stale. According to Houston wideout Andre Johnson, it was the biggest game in Texans history. Houston players wore their letterman jackets to Gillette and Football America waited for the torch to be passed to Gary Kubiak, Matt Schaub, and Arian Foster.
And then, the game started. It was an embarrassment. The Houston Texans were the Texas Frauds. The Patriots jumped to a 28-0 lead. Tom Brady was mercifully pulled when it was 42-7. The Patriots settled for a 42-14 win and sent the Texans on the road to ruin.
Less than a year later, the Patriots are flexing their muscles after last Sunday’s dramatic comeback over the Broncos. The 8-3 Patriots are favorites to run the table and return to the Super Bowl.
...and taking a huge dump on the Houston Texans at the same time:
And the Texans are a joke. Schaub (eight touchdown passes, nine interceptions) has lost his job to Casey Kasem, err, Case Keenum. Foster is recovering from back surgery. Kubiak suffered a mini-stroke and has been coaching from a booth upstairs. He is expected to return to the sideline Sunday afternoon.
Mocking the Texans this year is like doing layup drills with an 8-foot rim. It’s simply too easy.
What about Houston itself? Easy to mock, no?
And easy to write about - Shank nails the triple play!
UPDATE AT 1:25 PM
- When Shank says "The 8-3 Patriots are favorites to run the table and return to the Super Bowl", he means tied for third
favorites to win the Super Bowl. Or something...
Labels: Houston Texans, lame lyrics, Patriots