Tuesday, October 25, 2016

Taken To The Woodshed

Instead of a tweet or two about the upcoming World Series between the Cleveland Native Americans and the Chicago Cubs, Shank has to a) look backwards instead of forwards and b) keep shitting on the Red Sox instead:

Reader reaction follows, leading off is former WFNX lead leftist Henry Santoro:
Where I'm sure all of ten people heard it...

Other weigh-ins:

Because he's a world class asshole, that's why.

Classic response, encapsulating Shank perfectly:
Can't top that one - thread is over!

Rewriting History, Part II

My co-blogger notes in the post below the many times Shank has trashed a Red Sox player, manager or general manager as they were ending their tenure in Boston, only to have their careers resuscitated in Chicago or Cleveland. Shank's world class hypocrisy tour continues today as we await Game 1 of the 2016 World Series.
CLEVELAND — Theo and Tito.

Theirs are names from “Sesame Street,’’ or perhaps a couple of characters for a children’s book series: “Theo and Tito Go to the Zoo.’’ “Theo and Tito Say, ‘Goodnight, Moon.’ ’’
When I read a Shank column, I often think I'm reading a children's book.
But they are neither muppets nor fiction. Theo Epstein and Terry “Tito” Francona are the men who in 2004 brought Boston its first baseball championship in 86 years. Then they did it again in 2007.

Theo and Tito were together on Yawkey Way for eight years, winning an average of 93 games per season, making the playoffs five times, and filling Fenway for every game of every season. When they left after the chicken-and-beer collapse of 2011 — Theo voluntarily, Tito being pushed — it was like the breakup of Boston’s baseball Beatles.
Shank should have written them a thank you letter for the chicken & beer fiasco - he got about ten columns out of it.
Theo and Tito were together on Yawkey Way for eight years, winning an average of 93 games per season, making the playoffs five times, and filling Fenway for every game of every season. When they left after the chicken-and-beer collapse of 2011 — Theo voluntarily, Tito being pushed — it was like the breakup of Boston’s baseball Beatles.

Now they are on opposite sides of two “other” long-suffering franchises in the 112th World Series, which starts Tuesday night at Progressive Field. The Chicago Cubs, led by general manager Theo Epstein, have not won a World Series since 1908 and have not even participated in the Fall Classic since 1945. The Cleveland Indians, managed by Terry Francona, have not won a World Series since 1948. We have two plagued ball clubs led by a pair of curse-busting bosses.

Something has to give.
Dan Shaughnessy - Master of the Obvious.

Sunday, October 23, 2016

Out Nitwitted

First he takes credit for running them out of town. Then he criticizes their deportations.

So which is it, Shank?

The pending World Series matchup, writes The CHB, is an "emotional duel of guys who were dumped by the Red Sox, or quit the Red Sox."

As you might have guessed, it's a really stupid column.

But first, a shot at the 2016 Red Sox, which despite their 93 wins, were overrated, he argues, because they lost "the majority of their close games."

It's true that the Red Sox were 20-24 in one-run games in 2016. But guess who else was under .500 in one-run games? The Cubs (22-23). And guess who had the best record in the AL East in one-run games? The Yankees (24-12), who finished 9 games back of the Sox. And guess who had the majors' best record in one-run games? The Rangers (36-11), who are sitting home right now too.

It's a specious argument. But then again, The CHB is a specious guy.

The CHB's breakdown of the players who the Sox traded away is equal parts laughable and fallacy. Mike Napoli? Coco Crisp? No one wanted these guys.

Not even Shank, who on Jul. 8, 2015, said: "I would cut Napoli, just let him go." That was a few years after he blasted the Sox for keeping Crisp and letting Johnny Damon walk.

Andrew Miller was a stud, but the Sox picked up a stud lefty starter in return. Don't take my word for it: Shank said so here: "Eduardo Rodriguez has a chance to become Dan Duquette’s Jeff Bagwell."

And just one month ago he said he thought Rodriguez should be the third starter in the playoffs for the Red Sox.

Then there's Theo Epstein, of whom Shaughnessy said his "slow rebuilding style would not have worked in Boston the way it has in Chicago. ... Theo on a six-year plan with a $19 million contract, that's pretty easy to do that. I'm going to sat Boston wouldn't tolerate what Chicago went through to get here."

And in another column, this one for SI, from Dec. 14, 2009: "Epstein is touting organization prospects named Jose Iglesias, Ryan Kalish, Ryan Westmorland, Casey Kelly and Lars Anderson, but they are a couple of years away. In Boston the message needs to be 'win now.'"

In fact, he wrote in August 2012 that Theo deserved more blame for the state of the Red Sox than he's getting. "Epstein made a ton of bad moves in the later years of his tenure, then went to Chicago for a $19 million contract and watched from afar as the Sox decomposed. ...  Mistakes were made. Money was spent badly. The Sox lost their way and tried to throw money at their problems."

As for the others:

Who's the nitwit now? Shank, to thine own self be true.

Saturday, October 22, 2016

On This Day In Baseball History

Good thing Shank's around to remind us of all the positive things that have happened with the Red Sox.

Oh, wait!

Friday, October 21, 2016

Shank Tries His Hand In Politics

Disagree with a liberal? You must be unhinged!

Thursday, October 20, 2016

You Should Talk About Arrogance

Looks like something set off 'Ol Danny Boy today:
And the Red Sox winning the World Series in 2013 was a fluke. Some people are just born miserable, negative assholes.

Twitter users cut loose:

It's a thankless task, but someone's gotta do it!
Don't confuse Shank with the facts - he's got an organization to denigrate!
"See you in Houston" from four days ago - confirmed!
Right - he has this convenient / bad habit of arranging the numbers to suit his agenda.

Go read the rest of the thread if you want more Shank bashing.

Piss Off, Shank - DHL Dan - LIX

If I were Tom Brady, that's what I'd tell Shank, who called Brady a cheater just three months ago. That's how he leads off this latest installment of the Picked Up Pieces column.
Picked-up pieces while waiting for the next David Ortiz celebration at Fenway Park . . .

■ I miss Channel 7’s Dan Hausle in Foxborough. There were no Donald Trump questions for Tom Brady on Wednesday. It was all about football. Swell. But Brady did himself no favors last week by walking out of a press conference after he was asked to comment on “locker room talk.’’

Hundreds of athletes have answered the question in the last two weeks. The locker room is a professional athlete’s workplace, and it’s no political statement for an athlete to define his understanding of “locker room talk.’’

It’s OK to say that talking about sexual assault talk is not part of your locker-room culture. LeBron James wasn’t afraid to say it. Even Troy Brown said he’d like to have heard something from Brady on the topic.
At this point in his career, I'm surprised Tom talks to the media at all. I sure as hell wouldn't.

Tuesday, October 18, 2016

Number Four, Bobby Orr

Shank, as he tends to do with every fifth column or so, takes a look back in time and notes Bobby Orr's first game with the Boston Bruins:
There’s a Gretzky Camp and a Gordie Howe Camp, but around these parts, there has never been any doubt that Bobby Orr is the greatest hockey player who ever lived.

There’s no way to prove it, of course. It’s a subjective sports argument, which is part of what makes it fun. But for those of us who grew up around Boston and saw Orr play, there can never be any doubt. The rest of you can check the videotape, talk to folks who played with or against him, and maybe take a gander at that statue of a flying Bobby after the Mother’s Day goal in 1970.

I raise this topic today not because the young Bruins of 2016 are playing their home opener at the New Garden Thursday night, but because this week marks the 50th anniversary of Orr’s first game with the Bruins at the Old Garden in 1966.

Fifty years. The golden anniversary for the Golden Child. How can it be that a half-century has passed since the night we first saw the crew-cut teen-ager from Parry Sound, Ontario?
To be fair to Shank, this column did look like it took some level of effort; it's not the usual piece of crap he churns out on a routine basis.

Trolling 301

I'm getting the impression Scott Zolak doesn't like Shank:

Sunday, October 16, 2016

He Says This Every Year

Sound familiar?

Reader reaction is as you'd expect:
Pretty sure it's not the latter reason...

At Least He Has A New Thing

Compare and contrast with Captain Coin Toss, Double Score, Tomato Cans...

Hot Takes, By Dan Shaughnessy

Aren't you glad to have Shank around to discuss the implications of a freaking coin toss?