Big Bill Belichick

Shank was there to cover yesterday's Bill Belichick press conference, and gave it high marks.

FOXBOROUGH — Bill Belichick came up big Wednesday. Facing the media for the first time since his tight end, Aaron Hernandez, was charged with murder June 26, the legendary Patriots football coach was fair, measured, empathic, remorseful, dignified, ever-secretive, and best of all, human.

News flash - Bill Belichick is NOT a cyborg! I knew it!

Throughout the column, Shank lays it on thick in spots, and takes some shots along the way (emphasis mine):

This was necessary. The Hernandez case is nothing like Spygate, Tebowing, Fourth and 2, or hating on Eric Mangini. A young man is dead, an ex-Patriot is in jail, and the hard-earned brand of the local football team is forever tarnished.

There were still some toady Patriots fans who felt that their beloved coach (“In Bill We Trust”) could stay in the bunker forever, but Belichick put that nonsense to rest in his opening statement when he said, “I’m primarily responsible for the people we bring into the football operation . . . most of those decisions have worked out but some don’t. Overall, I’m proud of the hundreds of players that have come through this program but I’m personally disappointed and hurt in a situation like this.’’

Perfect. The coach knew that this was not the day to play the “stupid game,’’ that’s worked so well in Foxborough over the last 13 seasons. Belichick has demonstrated uncommon disdain for disclosure and public relations during his tenure with the Patriots. Ask him about tight end Rob Gronkowski’s status two days after a surgery and the coach might say, “I haven’t talked to the doctor yet.” Ask him if today is Thursday and he’ll deadpan, “Traditionally, Thursday is the day that follows Wednesday.’’

You get the sense from reading the column that Shank wants to rip Belichick a new one but never has an opening to do so, or just doesn't take it. With football season just around the cornere, there's still five more months to be an asshole. Patience, young Jedi...

Libel & Slander?

I'm kicking myself for not posting a prediction on Shank's next column last night, as it seemed to me almost too easy to predict this self-righteous column. Funny how a baseball writer can spend the entire part of the previous decade ignoring the likes of McGwire, Sosa and Bonds, and now takes a sudden interest in PED's.

Just call him Lyin’ Ryan.

In the pantheon of sports dirtbags, Ryan Braun goes down as one of the worst. He forever will be a baseball pariah.

Unfortunately that’s not enough. The disgraced Milwaukee Brewer got off easy. He deserved at least a one-year suspension. Probably more. I’d have been OK with a lifetime ban, which may be what’s coming for Alex Rodriguez.

As I was reading this column, I wondered if Shank would double down on his questioning of a certain Red Sox player earlier this year; and, sure enough:

It’s only going to get worse. At this hour, the Red Sox are engaged in a playoff hunt that no doubt involves players who someday will serve suspensions for their involvement with Biogenesis. You can guess some of their names and some of them already have prior positive tests. It makes you think twice about the “action” unfolding from now through October.

I wonder if Shank somehow got a list of names about the players involved in the Biogenesis matter? As of today, there are five names linked to this matter, none of whom are on the Red Sox roster.

I don't think it takes Albert Einstein to figure out who he's talking about. Good thing he didn't use his name in this article, or the Globe would be sued into bankruptcy.

Mr. Right (For Now)

Shank says many nice things about current Red Sox manager John Farrell and his positive influence on the 2013 Red Sox.

OAKLAND, Calif. — It was late morning on a splendid Sunday in northern California and John Farrell was holding court in the first base dugout at O.co Coliseum.

He was asked if he might name his starting rotation for next weekend’s big series with the Yankees at Fenway Park when the Sox return from the All-Star break.

“We’ll announce that as soon as we tell the guys who are making starts for us,’’ Farrell said politely.

There you go. More boredom from the top. More keeping things in-house. More respect for the major league ballplayers.

Naturally, Shank needs to remind you how bad the previous manager was:

A year ago the manager of the Red Sox might have spilled the beans, or ripped one of his pitchers, or asked “who cares?’’ or answered his cellphone before answering the question. He certainly wouldn’t have told his pitching coach who was starting against the Yankees.

That was then. This is now. Chaos and calamity have been displaced by peace and tranquility. Speaking in tongues has ceded to actual communication. Last place has become first place.

Which keeps with traditional Shank themes - say lots of nice things about the manager until the first big losing streak, then it's time for the manager to walk the proverbial plank and get run out of town.

The Oakland A's Road Trip

Shank joins the Red Sox on their annual trip to Oakland to play the Athletics. So far he wrote two columns while in Oakland, the first noting the number of former Red Sox on the A's roster, and what a lovable dump their ballpark is.

The second column, a game recap of the Saturday game, naturally comes after a 3 - 0 Red Sox loss. It seems to be a general rule of Shank's only to write about the Red Sox after a loss:

OAKLAND, Calif. — They started the season in New York, still shamed by 2012, promoting Jackie Bradley Jr. as the face of the franchise, admitting their phony sellout streak soon would end, and hoping to return to respectability. New manager John Farrell said he liked his team and Boston’s embattled ownership group promised “What’s Broken Can Be Fixed.’’

Sunday night the first-place Red Sox pause for the All-Star break. David Ortiz, Dustin Pedroia, and Clay Buchholz will travel to New York for the Midsummer Classic, while their teammates go home for a well-deserved rest.

After stumbling through their worst season in 47 years, the 2013 Red Sox own the best record in the American League, and a significant lead (3½ games entering Sunday) in the ever-competitive AL East. The Sox have 58 wins, tops in franchise history at the All-Star break.

How did this happen?

Eventually there will come a day where the near-constant reminders by Shank of how awful the 2012 Boston Red Sox were will run its course and deprive him of his much needed cudgel to bash the Red Sox over and over and over. Today is not that day.

Coliseum Column's a Dump

The Oakland Coliseum is a dump. Who knew?

It's not like the Athletics haven't been trying to move to San Jose for, oh, at least four years.

But that doesn't stop The CHB, in a hugely disjointed column, from first pointing out all that's wrong about the facilities, then noting all the former Red Sox players on the A's roster.

At least there's no reference to "MoneyBall" or "Billy Ball" (Martin or Beane). Probably because the A's are in first place.

Oh yes, and there's a random Larry Bird mention.

Monthly Update

Shank hasn't written a column for a few weeks, so we're treated to a monthly recap of the local professional sports scene.

Two things to note - he's using the column to suck up to the Red Sox; I wasn't aware that you could rebuild a bridge that Shank clearly nuked a few months back:

3. Red Sox. No team in baseball has more wins. And now that John Henry appears serious about buying the Globe (don't do it! - ed.), I must admit that, upon further review, everything the Sox do is just swell with me.

Since you have been away you need to know that the Sox have eight walkoff wins, love one another unconditionally, and clearly have the best chemistry in the history of baseball. The Sox lead the majors in runs scored and apparently can win the World Series without a legitimate closer. David Ortiz — teetering on the brink of outright release three years ago — has discovered the fountain of youth and simply gets better every day. Truly amazing. Jose Iglesias is putting up numbers that would make Rogers Hornsby blush and an outfield of Jonny Gomes, Daniel Nava, and Mike Carp is infinitely superior to those lean years when the Sox only had Jim Rice, Fred Lynn, and Dwight Evans. I am not the least bit worried about the Tampa Bay Rays, who have a cake schedule and just got David Price back. The Yankees and Orioles (both five back in the loss column entering Wednesday) also appear to be mirages. The Red Sox have 25 great guys who love each other. They are the envy of baseball. And John Henry might be the greatest human being who ever lived.

Also, Shank continues his jihad against the Patriots:

4. Patriots. Supreme tight end Aaron Hernandez has been arrested for murder, is a suspect in a 2012 double homicide, and owns a trail of guns and violence that resulted in at least one punctured eardrum and one lost eyeball. Some of this happened before the Patriots made the decision to reward him with a $40 million contract extension last year. Tuesday, Patriots owner Robert Kraft (looking more and more like Ralph Lauren and/or Hugh Hefner) broke the franchise’s extended silence and told a handpicked trio of reporters that the Patriots were “duped,’’ while still clinging to the whopper that it was Hernandez’s idea to donate $50,000 to the Myra Kraft Giving Back Fund when Hernandez signed his extension.

Please. Duped? This is an organization that requires media members to report to “security command,” then videotapes useless press sessions involving coach Bill Belichick and said reporters. Nothing is left to chance at Gillette Stadium.

Duped? Did Belichick ever talk to old pal Urban Meyer about this kid? Did the Patriots speak to any of their own players (check out the Matt Light quotes) before deciding that Hernandez, not Wes Welker, was the guy who should get the long extension and the bag of money? Players don’t know everything about one another. But they know whom they like and whom they trust.

The Patriots can’t win this one. They are damned if they do and damned if they don’t.

And Shank will do his best to keep it that way. He'll milk this one for the next two years.

Man Of The Year

Shank bags another prestigious reward:

NASHUA – While most of New England rejoiced when the Boston Bruins advanced to the Stanley Cup Final this season, Dan Shaughnessy was nervous.

Shaughnessy, a sports columnist at The Boston Globe for over 30 years, anxiously awaited the release of the Finals schedule with hope that Game 7 – which he would’ve had to work for the Globe – wouldn’t fall on June 27.

Fortunately for Shaughnessy and the Nashua Police Athletic League, it didn’t, and the worst that could happen would be Shaughnessy making a quick turnaround from Chicago to Nashua in one day to attend the PAL Sports Dinner at Conway Arena on Thursday.

However, the Bruins’ season ended Monday and Shaughnessy was in attendance to accept his 2013 PAL of the Year award.

You might be wondering what ties Shank has to the Nashua, New Hampshire area:

Shaughnessy, originally from Groton, Mass., was relatively unfamiliar with PAL when he was first offered the award. But his ties to the Nashua area – he has family in Hollis and Hudson and his brother-in-law, the late Don Marquis, was a longtime history department chairman at Nashua High School – and his appreciation for the police and youth sports made him proud to receive it.

Kind of a reach, if you ask me.

Refresh Time

"I hate to break it to everybody, but chemistry in a baseball clubhouse is way overrated. Winning requires talent, pitching, and three-run homers." - Shank, March 31, 2013

AL East Standings at Halfway Mark

Boston 48 33 .593 - Baltimore 43 36 .544 4 NY Yankees 42 36 .538 4.5 Tampa Bay 41 38 .519 6 Toronto 39 39 .500 7.5

Handwringing - II

Completely predictable.

Through the years, when real-world issues have visited the Sports Department, there have been some bad stories. Some of them strained the limits of believability. Others were simply sad.

Harry Agganis and Reggie Lewis died while they were in their 20s. Len Bias killed himself via cocaine intoxication before he played a game for the Celtics. The Patriots lost a Super Bowl, then revealed an in-house drug scandal. Tony Conigliaro had his career cut short by a beanball, then suffered a stroke and died at the age of 45. Rocky Marciano died in a plane crash. Ted Williams’s head was separated from his body and cryogenically frozen in the hours after his death.

More than a few of our professional athletes have landed on the police blotter. Players who were cheered at Fenway, Foxboro, and the Garden turned out to be gun-toters, wife beaters, drunks, drug abusers, thieves, and deadbeat dads.

But there has never been anything like this.

It gets better:

Please. No need piling on the franchise here. Hernandez’s associates and alleged actions are not the Patriots’ fault. But at a time when “Patriot Way” has become a sickening parody of its own mythical origins, New England’s front office needs to stop with the self-congratulation.

So, what does Shank do later on in the column? He piles on, of course!

The Hernandez saga brings up questions about the collective judgment of a conservative franchise that typically does exhaustive research before making the smallest decisions. How did the Patriots arrive at the conclusion that Hernandez was worthy of a $40 million contract extension, which included a $12.5 million signing bonus? Where were the background checks and red flags? What about Belichick’s deep roots with Hernandez’s college coach at Florida, Urban Meyer?

I know that there are a few things worse than being a raving, disingenuous hypocrite; right now, I can't think of them...

UPDATE, 6/28/2013 at 10:45 AM - From reader Walter, with a rhetorical question:

"How out of touch are the folks over on Morrissey Boulevard?

For years the readers have been subjected to articles on the editorial page and by their Metro columnists urging Boston area corporations to hire disadvantaged youths with perhaps checkered backgrounds.

And yet, Robert Kraft / Bill Belichick did just that with Aaron Hernandez and now they are being blamed for it."

Handwringing

Any bets that Shank will write yet again on Aaron Hernandez with a column tomorrow?

Good News, Bad News

The bad news first - the Bruins lost last night, 3-2, to the new Stanley Cup champions, the Chicago Blackhawks.

The good news? This is Shank's last Bruins' column for the next few months!

The Bruins were going back to Chicago. The New Garden was as loud as it’s ever been, the Stanley Cup was going to stay under wraps, and the greatest puck series of a generation was going to play out in a seventh game Wednesday night at the United Center.

And then it melted like a snowcone on Causeway Street on the hottest day of the new summer. Before you could say Grady Little or David Tyree, the Chicago Blackhawks had their own Miracle On Ice and captain Jonathan Toews was hoisting the Stanley Cup over his head.

Because we all know the impact Grady Little and David Tyree had on the outcome of the game. What garbage...

A Master Of The Obvious - II

Shank's Sunday column was so underwhelming, none of us wanted to post on it. Guess I drew the the shortest straw...

CHICAGO — Five games of blood and thunder. Three overtime contests and five overtime periods. Three wins for Chicago, two for Boston. An aggregate score of 14-13. Heavy hits and breathless action that raises the hair on your forearms. Midnight confessions after each game.

Is this the best Stanley Cup Final in the history of the National Hockey League?

“This is as good as I’ve seen,’’ said Hall of Fame hockey play-by-play announcer Mike “Doc” Emrick. “I can’t remember any better than this. The play has been at such a high level. You think there is nothing left for these guys, and then they keep coming back with more.’’

The Blackhawks beat the Bruins in Game 5 Saturday night, 3-1 (empty-net goal in the final, furious seconds) and will have a chance to win the Stanley Cup Monday night at TD Garden.

Don’t count on it. This thing has to go seven. And maybe a few more overtimes. Then it can be the best ever.

We live in an age of hyperbole and absolutes. Nothing can be simply great. It has to be the best of the best. There is a rush to anoint the latest as the best.

Adele is the best singer of all time. “Mad Men” is the best television show ever. Floyd Mayweather Jr. claims he’s the greatest fighter of all time, and Tiger Woods was on his way to being the best golfer ever.
LeBron James has two championships, so now he’s better than Bill Russell, Wilt Chamberlain, and Michael Jordan. He’s the best of all time.

Just like Bruins-Blackhawks, 2013.

Early Football Season For Shank

Never let an opportunity to bash the Krafts go to waste.

Traditionally, the Patriots take the field to the tune of “Crazy Train” by Ozzy Osbourne. It’s part of all-important game presentation.

Might be time to switch to Warren Zevon’s “Lawyers, Guns, and Money.’’

The Patriots are a football team. They are all about winning football games. Nothing more. The deadly serious Aaron Hernandez situation is the latest reminder of this hard fact.

Bob and Jonathan Kraft need to stop trying to make us think the Patriots are different from all those bad boys in the NFL. You know, all those guys who only care about winning.

Generally speaking, that's what separates successful sports franchises from the others. It looks to me that the Patriots have been better at this sort of thing than, for instance, the Cincinnati Bengals.

“If you’re going to be a part of this organization, there’s a responsibility and a sense of obligation that comes with it, because in my family’s mind, you’re carrying our last name as well,’’ Jonathan Kraft said after the Patriots signed Albert Haynesworth in 2011. “We just want [them] to understand what it means to be a Patriot and that there are certain things that are as important to us, and in some cases, more important to us, than winning.’’

No. The Patriots are no different than any other team. They’ll take a chance on trouble, which apparently is what they did when they drafted Hernandez in the fourth round in 2010.

Hernandez slipped in the draft because of maturity issues and failed drug tests while at the University of Florida. A lot of teams passed on him, but the Patriots took a shot. And so he came here and he played well. In August of 2012, the Patriots broke from standard operating procedure and rewarded Hernandez with a $37 million contract extension, which included a $12.5 million signing bonus. When Hernandez immediately gave $50,000 to the Myra Kraft Giving Back Fund, Bob Kraft called it, “one of the touching moments since I’ve owned the team.’’

I do recall Shank bringing up the issue of character with respect to the Patriots bringing in Haynesworth; memory and research both indicate that character was not an issue for Shank when Hernandez was drafted. To paraphrase a comment to Shank's article, when Mother Teresa lines up at tight end, consider the problem resolved.

UPDATE at 1:48 PM = Deadspin piles on.

A Tale Of Two Columns

Dan Shaughnessy, June 18th, 2013:

Before this Stanley Cup Final is over, the Bruins will be our Boys of Summer — on skates. And at this hour they are a feel-good team on a par with the 1967 Red Sox, the 1970 Bruins, and the 2001-02 Patriots.

There was a rainbow over Causeway Street when fans filed into the West End ice palace before Game 3 Monday night. By the end of the evening, Garden legions were thinking about the silver chalice that is the pot of gold in the National Hockey League.

On the latest date an NHL game has ever been played in Boston, the Bruins defeated the Chicago Blackhawks, 2-0, to take a 2-1 series lead in the Cup Final, which resumes Wednesday night at the Garden. If the Bruins win Game 4, they will have a chance to hoist the Stanley Cup on the ice of the United Center in Chicago Saturday night. Call JetBlue and American Airlines ASAP.

OK, that would be getting ahead of ourselves. But it’s easy to get swept away by the Black-and-Gold tide washing over New England in the spring/soon-to-be-summer of 2013. The Bruins are the team you love to love.

Dan Shaughnessy, two days later:

If you really want to know the truth, we were getting a little greedy about the whole thing.

It wasn’t a matter of if the Bruins would win the Stanley Cup. It was all about when. And where.

Would the Bruins win it in five in Chicago Saturday night? Or would they win it in six back at home on Causeway Street?

Six would be nice, we reasoned. The Bruins haven’t won the Stanley Cup on home ice since Mother’s Day 1970, when Bobby Orr flew through the air.

The parade route was another hot topic. Down Boylston Street seemed like a good idea. That would certainly be a triumphant moment after everything that’s happened this spring.

And who was the favorite for the Conn Smythe Trophy — Tuukka Rask or Patrice Bergeron?

So many premature questions. So many premature thoughts.

So, who was it getting ahead of ourselves, again?

Number 4

Shank interviews Bobby Orr, who played for both the Bruins and Blackhawks. It's an excellent column, because Bobby Orr does most of the talking.

False Expectations

Shaughnessy doesn't really get sports, does he?

Today he calls the Bruins a feel-good team on the level of the '67 Red Sox, the 1970 Bruins or 2001-02 Patriots.

For anyone who was watching, there's a big difference. The 1966 Red Sox finished 9th in the American League, 26 games behind the World Series winning Orioles. They has not been to the World Series since 1946 and were not expected to break that streak in 1967.

The 2000-01 Patriots finished 5-11 and in last place in the AFC East. They had missed the playoffs the year before as well, and had never won a Super Bowl.

The 1970 Bruins, on the other hand, were coming off one of the best seasons in club history, having set a franchise record 100 points and making it to the Eastern Division finals. They did not sneak up on anyone.

As for the 2011-12 Bruins, they won the Northeast Division with 102 points. They were the defending Stanley Cup Champions. They did not sneak up on anyone either.

The Red Sox and Patriots teams were utter surprises. The two Bruins teams are just doing what we expected them to do.

Look away.

Working Overtime

The Boston Bruins won the second game of the Stanley Cup final in Chicago, 2 - 1. Since the Bruins did not lose, Shank can't bring up the Finals loss to Edmonton in 1990 or the playoff loss to the Flyers three years ago, so instead we get a column about Tyler Seguin:

CHICAGO — Tyler Seguin is 21 years old. He can skate all night and stay up late and bounce back the next day. He might be the poster boy for this closing time, 2013 Stanley Cup Final.

Don’t make any plans for Tuesday or Thursday mornings this week. The Bruins and Blackhawks are coming to Boston and can’t settle things in three regulation periods of hockey.

Powered by Seguin’s best game of the playoffs, the B’s beat the Hawks, 2-1, in overtime late Saturday on a wrist shot from the left circle by Daniel Paille after a pinpoint cross-ice feed from Seguin.

Taking care of business and working overtime. That is the theme song of this Cup Final. And the later it goes, the better Seguin gets. He is Boston’s midnight rambler.

Nothing says hip & modern like quoting lyrics that are four decades old!

When you're doing a column on Tyler Seguin and the Bruins, you just have to mention other local sports teams:

Sometimes we give up too early on a player. Remember Chauncey Billups? Celtics coach Rick Pitino grabbed him with the third pick in the entire draft (small consolation for not getting Tim Duncan), then traded Billups three-quarters of the way through his first season.

Sometimes we wait too long on a player. Remember Laurence Maroney? The Patriots used their first-round pick on the running back from Minnesota and waited four years before dumping him. Bill Belchick’s patience with Maroney reminded me of Earl Weaver’s explanation for sticking with aging ace Mike Cuellar. Weaver said, “I gave Cuellar more chances than my first wife.’’

And then there's this:

He has not been “The Next One.’’ We don’t know exactly what he is. We’re not even certain if he’s a center or a winger.

Might want to confirm that he's a center with one of your colleagues, Shank...

Cold as Ice

Shaughnessy on hockey is like nails on a chalkboard, except nails do have their place in a classroom while The CHB has no business anywhere near anything with ice, except maybe a scotch glass.

All it took was one loss for Shank to roll out those tired tropes about bad bounces from-- get this -- 1990. Let's just forget that those Bruins were facing modern hockey's equivalent of the
'27 Yankees, while this year's edition won the Stanley Cup just two seasons ago.

And thank god the B's won in 2011, lest we be treated to a new CHB money grab: The Curse of the Zamboni.

The One Where Dan Goes to the Stanley Cup and Reports on a Baseball Game

It was a game about nothing.

That's the takeaway from The CHB's recap of Game 1 of the Stanley Cup. Comparisons abound to the Red Sox in 2004 and 2007, the Patriots-Bears Super Bowl in 1986 (when Mike Ditka was a coach!) and the 1918 World Series.

Oh yeah, and a Larry Bird mention. What more could we ask for in a column about hockey?

His Cup Runneth Over

The CHB thinks a Stanley Cup would be the ultimate response to the Boston Marathon bombings. This smacks of a future book.

Callous and calculating as ever, be His Shankness.

Shaughnessy on Drugs?

Shank gets treated to a taste of his own medicine.

The Midnight Hour

Shank stayed up late last night to give us a pretty good column on the Bruins' double overtime win over the Pittsburgh Penguins:

This was a Wilson Pickett Special. Wait Till The Midnight Hour. That’s when your love comes tumblin’ down.

The Bruins took a commanding 3-0 lead in the Eastern Conference finals at 12:13 a.m. Thursday when Patrice Bergeron slipped the puck past Penguins goalie Tomas Vokoun in the 16th minute of the second overtime to give Boston a 2-1 victory.

“We found a way,” said Bergeron. “It wasn’t necessarily our best effort in the first 60, but we regrouped in overtime. We are pretty tired, but it’s rewarding when you get results.”

Some of Boston’s most memorable sports moments have transpired in the midnight hour. Carlton Fisk’s moonshot off the foul pole in 1975 was struck at 12:34 a.m. David Ortiz’s Game 4 ALCS walkoff against the Yankees was hit even later. Adam Vinatieri’s overtime kick against the Raiders in the final game at snowy old Foxboro Stadium was a midnight-hour special. The Bruins and Edmonton Oilers went three overtimes in the Stanley Cup Final here in 1990.

Surprisingly, Shank does not mention a previous Bruins' 3 - 0 series lead that evaporated. Instead:

It’s the midnight hour for the Pittsburgh Penguins. The Bruins are going to the Final and the once-dominant Penguins are just trying to avoid the indignity of being swept.

Of course, Shank's trademark optimism is subject to change...

Flopping Column

You know you're expecting a terrible Shank column about Game 3 of the Bruins / Penguins series when it starts out like this:

“We were not just beating this team. We were destroying it. As much as I wanted to win that championship, I remember being disappointed that the Lakers were not playing better.’’

— Bill Russell, recalling a 1965 title-clinching game in which the Celtics scored 20 consecutive points, running to a 36-point lead over Los Angeles.

Welcome to Boston, you Pittsburgh Penguins.

This is just another irritating example of Shaughnessy having to interject some other sport into a given column; in this instance, it may well have to do about his, um, lack of expertise in the area.

Because we read him so you don't have to, he redeems himself later in the column, since he has a chance to take a dump on someone:

All eyes will certainly be on Sidney Crosby. Now that LeBron James has rescued the Heat in a Game 7, Crosby is the sports star with the most to prove in the spring of 2013. His reputation has taken a massive hit in the first two games of this series and he risks morphing into a Wilt Chamberlain/A-Rod pinata if he continues to pout and put up zeroes.

The sub-headline in Sports Illustrated’s May 13 cover story on Crosby reads, “You can’t keep Sidney Crosby down. You can only marvel at how hockey’s best player keeps coming back even better than when he left.’’

Well, the Bruins certainly have kept him down for two games. And the only thing to “marvel” about is the new notion that Crosby is a baby and a no-show on the big stage. He’s supposed to be the face of the NHL and the successor to Gordie Howe, Bobby Orr, Wayne Gretzky, and Mario Lemieux, but thus far in this series, he’s not nearly as good as Torey Krug. And let’s not embarrass him with the numbers about his faceoff failures against Patrice Bergeron.

And the coup de grace:

When an infant was heard crying on a JetBlue flight out of Pittsburgh Tuesday, the pilot asked whether it was Crosby crying in the back of the plane. This is not the image you want to take into Game 3 when your highly favored team was just outscored, 9-1, in the first two games of the conference finals.

A mixed bag, indeed.

Master Of The Obvious

Nothing gets past Shank:

NEW YORK — Clay Buchholz at this hour is the best pitcher in baseball.

Care to argue? Go ahead. Whom do you like better? Justin Verlander? Clayton Kershaw? Felix Hernandez? Stephen Strasburg? Matt Moore? Patrick Corbin?

Buchholz has outpitched all of them this year. He shut out the Yankees for five innings in Sunday night’s rain-shortened 3-0 victory, lowering his ERA to a major league-best 1.62. The Red Sox led in the sixth when the hard rains fell and the game was eventually called after a pair of delays. Buchholz improved his record to 8-0.

He hasn’t had a bad game. Not one. He pitched at least six innings in his first 10 starts and went only five Sunday night because the rains came while the Sox were hitting in the top of the sixth. There was no way manager John Farrell was sending Buchholz back to the mound after a 37-minute rain delay, especially given the fact that Buchholz missed his last start with stiffness in his throwing shoulder.

That's why Shank gets the big bucks - to tell you what you already know...

Rip Job?

Shank can't seem to write a story about positive things, like the Bruins' 3 - 0 win over the Pittsburgh Penguins last night, so instead he returns to beating the crap out of Jacoby Ellsbury. The reader is tipped off almost immediately:

This is not a rip job on Ellsbury. There’s no calling into question Ellsbury’s toughness or willingness to play hurt.

Then Shank proceeds to rip Ellsbury:

No need for MLB.com columnist Tom Werner to run to the keyboard and defend his player. Ellsbury missed the first two games of the Yankee showdown this weekend, but he’s played in 54 of 57 games in 2013. He’s practically been Cal Ripken Jr. Let’s call him Iron Man Ellsbury. Everyday Ells.

Nope, no rip job here!

The Boo Birds

Dan Shaughnessy, a man not exactly known for his civility, would like to inform you on manners at the ballpark:

NEW YORK — Boo.

This is not about Boo Radley, Boo Weekley, Honey Boo Boo, Boo Williams, Boo Ellis, Halloween, or Yogi Bear’s partner in picnic basket thievery.

This is about the noise fans make when they are displeased. This is about the nightly referendum at professional sports contests.

Whom do you cheer? Whom do you boo? And why?

This week, Jonathan Papelbon became the latest former Boston sports star to feel the wrath of fans who once worshipped at his size-13 feet. Pap returned to Fenway with the Philadelphia Phillies and was roughed up by Hub fans when he came out of the bullpen to face the Red Sox in the ninth.

Emotionally, this makes sense. I guess.

Being a fan is an emotional experience. It does not require reason or common sense. Cheering and jeering is all about laundry, right? Booing is on the fans’ Bill of Rights.

Still, booing Papelbon seems too dumb for words. It’s sort of like booing Johnny Damon when he came to town with the Yankees or booing Adam Vinatieri when he lines up for a field goal while wearing a Colts uniform.

It's unintentionally funny for him to acknowledge booing as not rational, then have him lecture us on who should be booed and who should not. You'd also think that a Boston Globe columnist who's infamous for writing the occasional nasty column about local athletes ought to have a level of awareness when he writes an ironic column such as this one.

Colorful History

Shank gives us an offbeat drive down memory lane before the Bruins and Pittsburgh Penguins start the Eastern Conference finals on Saturday night:

The Bruins play their next game sometime before the World Series (Saturday in Pittsburgh, to be precise), and in our effort to deliver all things Bruins-Penguins, we ask you to hop into the Jerry Trupiano Wayback Machine for some history of this rivalry and these old-timey sports cities.

■ The Penguins wore dark blue, light blue, and white as their colors when they first came into the league in 1967. They changed to black and gold in 1980, claiming it was an homage to the neighborhood champion Steelers and Pirates. Bruins boss Harry Sinden protested the change, claiming the Penguins were stealing Bruins colors.

Enough All Right, Shank

Dan Shaughnessy believes his Boston Globe readers are stupid, gullible and have short / nonexistent memories. This might be the explanation for him to write the following faux fanboy bandwagon column, presumably without the slightest hint of irony or self-awareness:

Never a doubt the Bruins were better team

Enough.

Enough of John Tortorella and his annoying press conferences. Enough of the goal-challenged Rangers pretending they had a chance against the Bruins. Enough of the antics of Derek Dorsett. Enough silly talk about the Bruins blowing another 3-0 series lead.

The B’s Saturday night put the Rangers and their fans out of their misery with a 3-1 Game 5, series-clinching victory over the New Yorkers. The Bruins advance to play the Penguins in the conference finals, starting next week at the Consol Energy Center in Pittsburgh. It’ll be Black & Gold vs. Black & Gold. Sidney Crosby is the only thing standing between the Bruins and another trip to the Stanley Cup Final.

It’s nice to have the Rangers in the rearview mirror. New York was merely an annoyance in Round 2. There was never a moment when the Rangers looked like the better team. They deserved to be swept, and were spared that indignity only because Tuukka Rask slipped on the ice at Madison Square Garden in Game 4. This led to a lot of hysteria about 2010 and the B’s collapse against the Flyers with Rask in net.

The word 'never' would apply to the columnist himself, wouldn't it? Once again, note the passive tone of 'Enough silly talk about the Bruins blowing another 3-0 series lead' and 'lot of hysteria about 2010 and the B’s collapse against the Flyers with Rask in net, as though he didn't have a damn thing to do with any of it:

But they will be reminded that three years ago — with Tuukka between the pipes — they blew a 3-0 series lead against the Flyers.

They will be reminded that they seem to have a big problem closing out playoff series.

They will be reminded that they gave away Game 4 in Madison Square Garden. Big time.
...
Or they’ll have to come back to New York and there will be thousand more reminders that Rask was between the pipes in 2010 when the Bruins blew a 3-0 lead against the Flyers.

Do these sentences sound like someone who supposedly never had a doubt about the Bruins winning this series? To me, it sounds like a columnist who at best takes his readers for fools and knaves, at worst openly lies to them.

Didn't See This One Coming

The Bruins lost to the New York Rangers last night, 4-3, on a series of mistakes; Tuukka Rask falling down, Zdeno Chara coughing up the puck near his own goal, and a penalty for too many men on the ice leading to three of the Rangers' goals.

Of course, Shank reminds us once again of a certain playoff series loss from three years ago:

But they will be reminded that three years ago — with Tuukka between the pipes — they blew a 3-0 series lead against the Flyers. They will be reminded that they seem to have a big problem closing out playoff series. They will be reminded that they gave away Game 4 in Madison Square Garden. Big time.

Note the use of the passive voice - 'they will be reminded'. Of course they'll be reminded - time and again, with Dan Shaughnessy leading the charge.

Just in case anyone missed the point:

They’d better win Saturday. Or they’ll have to come back to New York and there will be thousand more reminders that Rask was between the pipes in 2010 when the Bruins blew a 3-0 lead against the Flyers.

There will be reminders, all right - half of them will bear Shank's byline.

Whaddya Mean, It's Not Hockeytown?

Shank's been in New York City for the past few days, following the Bruins - Rangers series as we await Game 4 any minute now. He delivers a pretty good column as he takes the pulse of the city and finds little life interest in the hometown hockey team.

NEW YORK — Hockeytown, this is not.

The New York state of mind is not focused on the neutral zone trap. It’s hard to be a Rangers fan in the city. Spike Lee and Whoopi Goldberg don’t splice Rangers footage into their films.

Sure, the Rangers have fans and sellouts and Original Six tradition, and they even won a Stanley Cup back in 1994. But I have been here since Monday and I am here to tell you that there is no buzz in this town for the New York Rangers. (closing some bars - now that's a different story! - ed.) The House of Blueshirts is the hockey house of blues.

It’s not just because the 2012-13 Rangers can’t score goals, have no power play (2 for 38 in playoffs), and are teetering on the brink of elimination. No. It was like this in the days leading up to Tuesday night’s de facto clincher by the Bruins.

Hockey Hyperbole

A week removed from Shank jumping back on the Bruins bandwagon, we have seen the Bruins win three straight games over the New York Rangers, with the latest win being last night's 2-1 road win at Madison Square Garden. Naturally, Shank overreacts to this win streak:

NEW YORK — They may never lose another game.

Maybe this is the year. Again. Maybe Dave Goucher’s Game 7 Toronto call of “Bergeron! Bergeron!’’ is destined to go into the Boston sports audio Hall of Fame, alongside Johnny Most’s “Havlicek stole the ball!’’ and Joe Castiglione’s “Can you believe it?”

On the strength of Daniel Paille’s goal with 3:31 remaining, the Bruins beat the Rangers, 2-1, Tuesday night and now hold a 3-0 series lead in their best-of-seven conference semifinal. They have been a rocket sled on Bauer blades since they stared into the face of elimination in Game 7 against the Maple Leafs.

Then throw in a mistake that hockey novices make:

Tyler Seguin got away with a stick to the face of Chris Kreider...

Tyler Seguin was shooting the puck when that happened, and the follow-through on that shot is what caused his stick to hit Kreider in the face. Might want to consult the rule book on that one, Mr. Associate Editor at the Boston Globe...

Picked Up Pablum

Shank could have used some positive, hometown themes with his most recent column; he had the opportunity to write about the Red Sox and their recent five game winning streak, or he could have chosen to get near his quota of yearly Bruins games by writing about yesterday's 5-2 thumping of the New York Rangers.

Instead, he used the guise of yet another underwhelming picked up pieces column in an attempt to justify his May 11th column all but accusing David Ortiz of using performance enhancing drugs:

Facts, not opinions: According to Major League Baseball, there have been 636 professional players suspended for violating MLB’s drug policies since 2005. Two hundred and thirty-four of those 636 are from the Dominican Republic. That’s 37 percent. Players from the Dominican Republic made up 10.4 percent (89 of 856) of Opening Day rosters in 2013. Of 38 positive tests involving major league players, 13 players (34 percent) hailed from the DR. This doesn’t mean all Dominican players use steroids. It means the steroid issue is significant in the DR. Some of you old-timers might remember a time when East German swimmers were more likely to test positive for banned substances than other swimmers. An exhaustive ESPN.com report from 2009 (headlined “Steroid problem reaches critical mass in the DR”) stated, “According to numbers provided by MLB, in 2004, the inaugural year of drug testing in the Dominican Summer League, 11 percent of teenage prospects signed by major league clubs tested positive.’’

I'm pretty sure the only relevant fact here is this - did David Ortiz use PED's this year? Big Papi himself reported a random drug test conducted on the same day (May 11th) of the original column. Unless Shank has some undisclosed inside information, I don't see the logic of this portion of the column, which is nothing more than a defense of the May 11th column. Since Ortiz has every motivation to shut Shank up, we'll have to wait until Big Papi's test results come out.

Back On The Bruins Bandwagon

There are sure signs of spring in Boston - the sun is out, birds are chirping, flowers are blooming, and Dan Shaughnessy climbs back on the Bruins Bandwagon after a first round playoff series win.

Thank you, Bruins, we needed that win

We?

The Day After was almost as much fun as the Night Before.

"I mean, I had a column half written when I was going to compare Claude Julien to Grady Little and everything! That was fun too!"

You could not tend to daily business without talking or hearing about the Bruins’ Game 7 miracle comeback Monday night at the Garden.

Where were you when they fell behind the Maple Leafs, 4-1, in the third? Did you (gulp) leave the game? Did you turn off the TV and go to bed? Did you sit up with new hope when Nathan Horton scored to cut it to 4-2 with 11:22 left? Did you wake your kids when the Bruins tied it with two goals in 31 seconds in the final 1:22? Did you have trouble getting to sleep after the epic comeback? Did you get calls, texts, and e-mails from friends and relatives around the country?

Everyone, it seemed, had a story. Everyone had an opinion. Everyone had hope. Everyone was buoyed by the Bruins.

The words 'we' and 'us' are used conspicuously throughout the article, which is your surest sign that Shank's back on board, at least until next week. Other than Shank's shameless bandwagon hijacking, it's a decent column. Better get those leaf springs checked out!

Hacktastic!

There is no doubt whatsoever that Mike's excerpt below is precisely what Shank wanted to write after Game 7 of the Leafs - Bruins series. Actual events have a nasty habit of upsetting the apple cart:

It was only a first-round series, against a team that hasn’t won a playoff series in nine years.

It was not Bobby Orr scoring to win a Stanley Cup championship. Or Adam Vinatieri splitting the uprights at the Superdome. Or coming back from a 3-0 deficit against the Yankees.

But it was one of the great moments in Boston sports history. In a pulsating Game 7 against the Toronto Maple Leafs Monday night, the Bruins trailed, 4-1, with 11 minutes left, but rallied to tie the game (two goals in the final 1:22 of regulation), then beat the Maple Leafs, 5-4, in overtime on a goal by Patrice Bergeron. Bergeron’s follow-up shot in the sixth minute of OT pushed the Black and Gold to a second-round series against the New York Rangers.

And what's a column about the Bruins without yet another comparison to the Red Sox?

The Bruins were done. They were Toronto toast. They were going down hard. They were going to be scorned. Julien was going to be Grady Little (there's still time for that one, Shank! - ed) and the Bruins were going to be the Manila Folders of ice. They were going to exit from the playoffs in a seventh game for the fifth time in six seasons. They were going to blow a 3-1 series lead. We were going to have the sounds of silence at TD Garden.

That's Our Man Shank - rooting for the loss!

Iced

Dan Shaughnessy, typing away with 2:30 left in the Bruins game last night:

"Here in the Stub of Hockey, they are Wrong Ways on Causeway, the Not so Fleet on Center Ice. Claude (as in "Clod") Julien may never have to buy a drink in this town again, but that's a good thing since he will be looking for a new job come Wednesday. Can we say another 40 years between Cups?"

Dan Shaughnessy, at 6:05 of overtime in the Bruins game last night:

"Oh crap."

Anything But Quiet

Confirming Shank's presence at Fenway yesterday, we are treated to a column that was predictably written as the Red Sox have lost seven of their previous ten games.

In case there's any doubt that he's pissed off his last ally in the Red Sox organization, here's Shank on Tom Werner, who once got Shank's daughter an internship in Werner's TV production company, a favor long forgotten:

Red Sox “Chairman” Tom Werner (third-most-famous Chairman, trailing only Mao and Frank Sinatra) was not provoked to write another missive summoning the spirit of Jackie Robinson and complaining that the Globe and other media outlets are being unfair to Sox players.

It's a compliment to be compared to a communist dictator responsible for millions of deaths, isn't it?

Shank also quotes the former Baltimore manager Earl Weaver, who for whatever reason Shank did not write anything about when Weaver passed on earlier this year:

What we are seeing is market correction from the 20-8 start. It was Earl Weaver who said “you are never as good as you look when you win or as bad as you look when you lose’’ and the 2013 Red Sox are a good example of this. They have come back to the pack but let’s not get greedy. There is every indication that they are in this race to stay and that is a good thing after what the Nation endured in 2012.

Seven weeks ago, Shank had the Red Sox battling for last place in the AL East race:

The question now is, “Who are you going to pick to finish in last place — the Red Sox or the Yankees?’’

Shank then uses the remaining part of his column to write about himself and the Ortiz kerfuffle of his own making. Way to make some headlines, Shank!

Making Friends

Check out Shank's latest trip to the Red Sox clubhouse:

As David Ortiz prepared to leave the Red Sox clubhouse after the team’s 3-2 loss to the Blue Jays, he did a double-take. The sight of Dan Shaughnessy, the Boston Globe columnist who confronted the slugger directly with suspicions about the possibility of his use of steroids, standing with a group of reporters, caught Ortiz’s attention.

“Look who it is,” Ortiz said.

He paused for a moment, then noted — loudly enough that all in the clubhouse were party to his address — that on the very day on which Shaughnessy interviewed him, he took a test for PEDs. Ortiz said he would be sure to pass along results of that test to the columnist. Ortiz became slightly more animated as he noted that he’d taken 40 tests administered by Major League Baseball.

“I’ve never tested positive,” Ortiz told the columnist, who had referenced the fact that the New York Times discovered in 2009 that the slugger had tested positive for a performance-enhancer in 2003 (at a time when a) there were no penalties for positive tests and b) test results were supposed to be anonymous).

When the report surfaced four years ago, Ortiz disputed that he had ever knowingly used PEDs, something that he mentioned anew to Shaughnessy as he walked towards the clubhouse door.

“By the way,” Ortiz said, “let me know what I tested positive for in 2003.”

As he spoke, while Ortiz was clearly upset, his tone remained relatively measured. He did not seek a response from Shaughnessy, nor did the columnist say anything while Ortiz spoke, though he did position himself to speak to Ortiz if the slugger wanted to do so.

Awkward!

The Long March

Shank's first column on the Boston Bruins in two months, naturally, comes after a loss. Would it be fair to question whether Shank's been advised by his boss not to write about the Red Sox for a few weeks?

We should know by now that the Bruins never, ever do it the easy way. They rarely get the job done in five games. It’s usually seven.

And so the Bruins must return to Toronto to give the emboldened Maple Leafs another shot Sunday night.

With a chance to close out the desperate Leafs, the Bruins dropped a 2-1, Game 5 decision on Causeway Street Friday night and now must go back across the border before they can advance to the second round of the 2013 Stanley Cup playoffs.

Careful, B’s. The Maple Leafs are to the NHL what the Red Sox were to the American League before 2004. They are an Original Six team in a hockey-crazed town and they haven’t won a Cup since the Dave Keon team of 1967. When you get ahead of them, three games to one, it’s a good idea to put them away. The Bruins couldn’t do that and you know the good folks of Toronto will go all Kevin Millar on us. They’ve got Phil (rhymes with Schill) Kessel in Game 6 and anything can happen in Game 7.

This column irritates in so many ways. In addition to the negative timing & angle (as this column comes after a lackluster loss, we expect no less from Shank!), he is compelled once again to make numerous references to the Red Sox, which no Shank column should be without, provides (if that is the right word) a paint-by-numbers recap of the game (better read elsewhere) and offers little in the realm of substantive analysis. Like last night's game, this is a half-assed effort by the home team.

And Shank, as has been mentioned before, continues to dwell on the Bruins' loss to the Flyers three freakin' years ago:

“We played good in the second half of the game,’’ said Rask, who was goalie when the Bruins blew a 3-0 series lead to the Flyers three years ago. “We have to take that with us and start the game up there like we finished here. We have to learn from it.’’

Other than the obvious point that Shank just loves beating up on the home team when they lose, I fail to see any reason whatsoever why this needs to be brought up time and time again.

Last Red Sox Bridge Burned

... or was it nuked? When Tom Werner, Red Sox chairman, feels compelled to respond to Shank's column on Wednesday all but accusing David Ortiz of using performance enhancing drugs, you're pretty much blacklisted.

Wednesday, the Boston Globe's Dan Shaughnessy suggested that David Ortiz might be using performance-enhancers because "it is not natural for a guy to hit .426 out of the gate."

He said that David's 27-game hitting streak was suspect, in part, because older players "do not get better" and, most disturbing to me, because he is from the Dominican Republic.

The story soon became Topic A on talk shows, on ESPN.com and on NESN. In fact, Wednesday night, Tim Wakefield was drawn into the conversation and tried to restore order by saying, "I'm tired of people pointing fingers because somebody is doing well. David is producing because he is a great hitter."

The swirling story prompted Ortiz, after going 0-for-5, to tweet, "End of my hitting streak tonight, the season still going and I hope Dan Shaughnessy is a happy man now. ... Not more .426 enjoy it."

Earlier last week, a Toronto radio host accused Clay Buchholz of doctoring pitches. He made this claim despite the fact that no Major League player that Buchholz faced this April had made any such suggestion regarding how Clay had pitched this year. Instead of Boston celebrating Buchholz's 1.60 ERA, we had to read and hear these charges, which went viral. Clay was naturally frustrated and had to issue this comment, "To have somebody say that I'm out there cheating is doing me an injustice."

I fully acknowledge the right the media has to ask difficult questions and to express controversial opinions. Freedom of the press is fundamental in our culture.

They had the right, but was it right?

We're in a new media world, and fact-less accusations stick.

Those who publicly ask questions must take responsibility for their words.

Don't hold your breath waiting for that...

Asking The Tough Questions

Our man Shank talks to David Ortiz about his performance thus far in 2013.

“How do you think he does it? I don’t know! What makes him so good?’’

Pete Townshend, “Pinball Wizard”

Hitting is not this easy. Athletes do not get better as they mature into their late 30s. Baseball has been peppered with performance-enhancing drugs for the last 20 years. The cheaters are always ahead of the testers. A number of players from the Dominican Republic have tested positive for steroids. Injuries to the Achilles’ tendon are consistent with steroid use. It is not natural for a guy to hit .426 out of the gate without the benefit of any spring training.

So David Ortiz knows. He knows he is a suspect. He knows there are people out there who think he’s cheating. His name appeared on a list of players who tested positive for PEDs in 2003. And what he is doing now just doesn’t look possible.

When you cheat at cards, they tell you to lose a couple of hands to make it look good. Ortiz can’t even seem to do that. He just keeps raking. Ortiz Tuesday night extended his hitting streak to 27 games, dating to last July, before he got hurt.

‘My bat speed has been the same since the first day I got here.’

This is an uncomfortable topic, but it’s preferable to question a man face-to-face than to tarnish him by whisper and innuendo (how about in print, Shank? - ed.). I went to Ortiz Tuesday afternoon in the Sox clubhouse and put some hard questions to him. I told him he looks dirty.

Big Papi's been down this road before. Nice to see the scales finally fall from Shank's eyes, isn't it?

And Now For More Boston Globe Bashing - XX

LeBron James won his fourth MVP award in the past five seasons, garnering 120 of 121 first place votes. From this, a minor controversy arose - why wasn't LeBron a unanimous selection, and who was the lone idiot holdout?

Ladies and gentlemen, meet Gary Washburn of the Boston Globe!

The End Has Arrived

The New York Knicks won their first playoff series with Carmelo Anthony, beating the Celtics, 88-80.

Last call on Causeway Street.

The end of a game.

The end of a season.

The end of an era.

The Celtics came back from a 26-point deficit in the fourth quarter — cutting the margin to 4 — but could not catch the Knicks in Game 6 Friday night. Overrated ball hog Carmelo Anthony scored 7 straight points, snapped a string of 19 consecutive 3-point misses, and led the Knicks to an 88-80 victory over the gritty, graying Celtics.

Shank, in a pretty good column, then discusses the future of the Celtics, with the obligatory comparison to the other local teams:

Clearly, it is time to break up the old gang that brought one championship and multiple playoff wins since the start of the 2007-08 season. The Celtics have become the local team with the least amount of hope. Would anyone dispute the notion that the Patriots, Bruins, and Red Sox (yes, even them) are closer to a championship than the Celtics?

Would anyone dispute the notion that Shank will be raising similar issues, and conveniently forget what he wrote here, when the Bruins end their playoff run, or with the first three game losing streak by the Red Sox, or when he starts writing about the Patriots & trashing Bill Belichick in the process?

And Now For More Boston Globe Bashing - XIX

Alternate title - can't wait for the New York Times' 10-K, if this article is an accurate leading indicator of performance in the industry.

The Washington Post Co. on Friday reported bad news for its newspaper division, with revenue totaling $127.3 million for the first quarter of this year — down four percent from 2012 — and an operating loss of $34.5 million.

Overall, the company posted a profit of just $4.7 million, an 85 percent drop in earnings from the net income of $31 million for the first quarter of last year.

In the newspaper division, daily and Sunday circulation at the Post dropped 7.2 and 7.7 percent, respectively, compared to 2012. Average daily circulation totaled 457,100 copies, with Sundays at 659,500. The report also noted that in January of this year, the Post increased the paper’s price for daily home delivery and daily and Sunday single copies. And print advertising revenue at the Post in the first quarter of 2013 dropped 8 percent to $48.6 million, down from $52.7 million in the first quarter of 2012.

Every dark, dark cloud has it's silver lining:

As for online — primarily washingtonpost.com and Slate — the company had better news to report. Revenue generated by the company’s online publishing increased 8 percent to $25.8 million for the first quarter of 2013, compared to $23.9 million for the first quarter of 2012. The company also posted a 16 percent increase in online display advertising, although online classified advertising revenue on washingtonpost.com fell 6 percent for the first quarter of 2013.

The company, meanwhile, has announced plans for a paywall this summer.

I wonder how that's working out for the Boston Globe? We'll find out when the 10-K comes out, which should be in the very near future. Astute observers of this site will note this has not been an issue here in quite a few months; it's amazing what can happen when you put your mind towards solving a problem and trading notes with others.

The End Was Near

The Celtics have staved off elimination in the NBA playoffs in two successive games, with yesterday's win coming at New York, 92 to 86. Shank's Thursday column is one of the few times a Red Sox reference is fitting.

NEW YORK — Perfect.

The Knicks are choking. They haven’t won a playoff series since 2000 and now they have a chance to be the first team in NBA history to blow a 3-0 series lead in a best-of-seven playoff. The wait of 13 years has become the weight of the basketball world.

Suddenly, Celtics-Knicks has morphed into Red Sox-Yankees, circa 2004. Carmelo Anthony is Alex Rodriguez. James Dolan is George Steinbrenner. Jason Terry is Dave Roberts, and Doc Rivers is Terry Francona. We’re not quite sure who’ll get to play Curt Schilling with the bloody sock. Game 6 is Friday night on Causeway Street and the Knicks are certain to be tighter than Kevin Brown before Game 7 of the 2004 ALCS.

No team in baseball ever came back from 3-0 . . . until the 2004 Red Sox did it against the Yankees. Now the Celtics have a chance to do the same thing . . . to the Knicks.

Throw in some good old-fashioned trash talking, and now you have an interesting and entertaining series.

Coming Out

In today's column, Shank discusses Jason Collins, former Boston Celtic, who announced yesterday that he is gay.

The big deal about this . . . is that it’s not a big deal.

Veteran NBA center Jason Collins came out of the closet Monday. In a first-person article for Sports Illustrated, Collins told the world that he is gay. He became the first active player in a major American sport to acknowledge his homosexuality.

And it is not a big deal. It is not Jackie Robinson in 1947. Collins has come out at a time when few will challenge his right to his own sexual identity. There no doubt are folks who wish Collins kept this to himself, but woe is the ballplayer or commentator who will question anything about Collins’s sexual orientation.

We have evolved. There are gay men and women in just about every workplace. There have been gay ballplayers for more than a century. We just didn’t know about it.

One Month In, He's Wrong Again

“The question now is, 'Who are you going to pick to finish in last place — the Red Sox or the Yankees?' ’’ -- The CHB, March 24, 2013 American League standings as of this afternoon:
EAST	W	L	PCT	GB	HOME	ROAD	RS	RA	DIFF	STRK	L10
Boston	18	7	.720	-	11-5	7-2	128	88	+40	Won 5	7-3
NY Yankees	15	9	.625	2.5	9-4	6-5	112	97	+15	Won 4	7-3
Baltimore	15	10	.600	3	7-5	8-5	129	104	+25	Lost 1	7-3
Tampa Bay	12	13	.480	6	8-4	4-9	103	97	+6	Won 2	7-3
Toronto	9	17	.346	9.5	5-8	4-9	95	130	-35	Lost 4	2-8

Wash, Rinse, Repeat!

Shank's Wednesday column on the Boston Celtics reflected on the team being down, 2 - 0, to the New York Knicks. Now that the Celtics are down 3 - 0, Shank recycles that column.

It’s ice time on Causeway Street. The Bull Gang can pack away the parquet after the Celtics and Knicks play Game 4 on Sunday. You don’t need Red on Roundball to tell you that this series is not coming back to Boston next week.

And what's a Shaughnessy column without a mention of Bill Belichick and cheap alliteration?

Draftmaster/sartorial savant Bill Belichick has a catch-all phrase for those rare occasions when the Patriots submit a terrible performance. The Hoodie will stand at the podium and mumble, “That’s not what we were looking for.’’

This is a polite explanation for what unfolded at the Garden on Friday. Fans came out to see the Celtics shake down the thunder from the banner-festooned rafters. Instead, they got another terrible performance from the Green Team. The Celtics were humbled by the Knicks, 90-76, and now face a potential season-ending Game 4. Two years after thumping their chests and sweeping the Knicks, the broom is on the other size-16 Nike.

Not what we were looking for.

Throw in a random Larry Bird reference for good measure:

It only got worse. Anthony (26 points on 12-for-25 shooting, no assists) was Michael Jordan and Larry Bird in the third and fourth quarters as the Knicks shot to a 21-point lead. He was the true Fab Melo. Every time the Knicks needed a basket, Anthony scored.

After two decent colums, Shanks reverts to form, or lack thereof...

The End Is Near

Hate to agree with Shank, but he may be right about this year's Boston Celtics.

NEW YORK — It feels like the end is near.

When Rajon Rondo went down with a torn ACL in late January, we all wrote the obituary for the 2012-13 Green Team. But then the Celtics started playing well again and we temporarily lost sight of the fact that they have little chance to advance in the playoffs this spring.

Tuesday night the Celtics were beaten, 87-71, in Game 2 of their first-round series with the overrated Knicks and now we are back to remembering what we felt when Rondo first went down.

It is not impossible, of course, for the Celtics to come back in this series. They’ve been down 0-2 and won a series before. They did it in in the spring of 1969 when Bill Russell and Sam Jones were getting ready to retire.

And now, for a little Rick Pitino flashback:

But it doesn’t feel like it’s going to happen this year. Bill Russell is not walking through that door. Sam Jones is not walking through that door. The Celtics scored 8 points in the fourth quarter of Game 1 and 23 points in the second half of Game 2. They shot an aggregate 14 for 63 in the second halves of the two losses.

Also of note - this is Shank's second consecutive quality column, which begs the question: are there any 'end of the world' prophecies in the near future we haven't heard about?

Oink, Oink

For those of us who've followed professional basketball for years, Shank's column on the New York Knicks' Carmelo Anthony states the fairly obvious.

NEW YORK — Overrated ball hog.

This is Carmelo Anthony. He doesn’t seem to be a bad guy. He is not the devil. He’s probably going to shoot the Knicks past the Celtics in the first round of these NBA playoffs.

But he’s not going to be an NBA champion. He’s not one of the all-time greats. He appears to be incapable of doing anything to help his team unless he has the ball in his hands.

Shank then reels off many past NBA champions, including Larry Bird, natch, and bolsters the above statements throughout a pretty good column.

How Small Is This Group?

In recent months, Shank seems to be racking up accolades in one form or another:

Hall recognizes players, executives, journalists and entertainers of Irish descent.

New York, NY (PRWEB) April 17, 2013

The Irish American Baseball Hall of Fame (IAB HOF) today announced its 2013 inductees: popular former Mets Rusty Staub and Joe McEwing; longtime owner of the LA Dodgers Peter O’Malley; Hall of Fame baseball writer Bill Madden of the New York Daily News; and award-winning columnist for the Boston Globe Dan Shaughnessy.

The authors of Dan Shaughnessy Watch aren't into cheap cultural stereotyping, but I feel compelled to point out the following:

The induction ceremonies will take place at Noon on Tues, May 7, 2013, at Foley’s NY Pub & Restaurant (18 W. 33rd St.), which houses the Irish American Baseball Hall of Fame. Ballots were cast by past inductees and a panel of baseball experts and historians.

“We are proud to induct the Irish American Baseball Hall of Fame Class of 2013 for their contributions to the game,” said Shaun Clancy, president of the Irish American Baseball Hall of Fame and owner of Foley’s, which features one of the country’s most extensive public displays of baseball memorabilia. "The 2013 inductees include two of America's best known sports writers in Bill Madden and Dan Shaughnessy and the longtime owner of one of baseball's iconic franchises in Peter O'Malley. We are also proud to honor two of the most popular players in Mets history: Rusty Staub, a main cog in the 1973 NL Championship season, and "Super Joe" McEwing, a tough and versatile competitor for the 2000 World Series team."

Shank's contributions:

· Dan Shaughnessy: Award winning columnist for the Boston Globe for over 30 years, Shaughnessy is the author of 12 books including The Curse of the Bambino, which chronicled the misfortunes of the Red Sox after trading Babe Ruth to the Yankees, and The New York Times bestseller Francona, which he co-authored with the former Red Sox manager. Shaughnessy has been honored 11 times as Massachusetts Sportswriter of the Year and has been named nine times as one of the Top 10 Sports Columnists in America by AP Sports Editors. He serves on the New England regional board of UNICEF and is proud of his Irish roots in County Galway.

Out of Touch

Unbelievable. The same guy who has spent a career whining about how men in tights are overpaid and underappreciative of their luck in life now has the gall to say "We know our place. The games are entertainment."

If only he could show that perspective when people aren't getting killed.

The Day After

Shank writes about yesterday's bombing at the Boston Marathon.

You live here, so you got the calls. And the texts. And the e-mails.

Are you safe? Are you OK? Were you there? Is everybody in your family all right?

This was one of those days when you found out how many great friends you have. Worldwide, word spread that Boston — the Boston Marathon — was under attack, and folks from other corners of the country and the world reached out to find out how you and your family were doing.

More end to more innocence. One of our best days is forever tainted. The 117-year-old Boston Marathon will never be the same. The journey from Hopkinton to Boylston Street is now a 26.2-mile stretch of yellow police tape. Do not cross.

Crying in their Weird

This is what passes for sports reporting in Boston these days: The CHB and some other dude talking about whether John Lackey is now a sympathetic person.

Not about whether he can pitch. Not about whether he can pitch well. But whether the fans (and media, of course) are ready to accept him as a Red Sox.

Sample analysis: "I don't know what we're going to get out of him. ... But first Lackey's gonna need to get back on the field."

Hey, and Silva sounds as effeminate as Shaughnessy. It's Douche Squared.

DHL Dan - XX

The spring sports equinox is upon us. With so many different events going on, Shank can't pick just one, so he writes about all of them!

Picked-up pieces while waiting for Larry Lucchino to return a phone call . . .

Don't hold your breath, Shank - you burned your last bridge with the Red Sox organization. The only surprise is that it took this long.

Is your head spinning? The Sox are off and running. The Celtics and Bruins are readying for the playoffs. Tiger is getting ready to wear the red shirt at the Masters. Two Connecticut schools battled for the NCAA hockey championship in Pittsburgh Saturday night. The Red Sox play the major league’s only morning-start game on Monday and our city is peppered with folks from around the world who are here to watch and run in the 117th Boston Marathon.

Any word on where Tiger's gonna take a leak, Shank?

The rest of the column is predictable pablum; read at your own risk.

Swing And A Miss

I missed this column from Monday, and it's a gem. We're a Springsteen quote, a 'Sons of Tito' mention and a cheap shot at Bill Belichick away from this being the ultimate signature Shaughnessy column.

Sarcasm? Check:

The Redemption Tour comes home Monday afternoon and the “Please Don’t Hate Us” Red Sox are in sole possession of first place for the first time since Sept. 1, 2011.

Pretend that you weren't licking the previous manager's balls? Check:

It’s a good day to feel good about the Sox again. They have delivered on their promises to play hard and be more likable. They’ve vetted clubhouse poisons and assembled a unit of worthy veterans and wide-eyed kids. They are managed by a true professional, and ownership hasn’t insulted the fan base in several months. They have new-millennium gold dust twins Jose Iglesias (.529 average) and Jackie Bradley Jr., and sophomore Will Middlebrooks, who hit three home runs in Sunday’s 13-0 rout of the division-favorite Blue Jays.

Dump on Red Sox management? Check:

“Make no mistake,’’ Sox CEO Larry Lucchino wrote to fans in a spring training welcome letter (Lucchino specializes in letters to fans), “with a 69-win season in our rearview mirror, the challenge to beat back the skeptics and re-assert ourselves is an invigorating one for all of us.’’

Gratuitous acknowledgement of the team's performance so far this year? Check:

The 2013 Sox have blasted from the starter’s gate with four wins in six games in New York and Toronto. They hit a whopping six homers in the Rogers Centre Sunday and at 2:05 p.m. Monday play the Baltimore Orioles in the 113th franchise home opener.

Whine about a mild New England winter, having spent about a month of it in Florida? Check:

It doesn’t take much to rekindle the passion of New England baseball fans. Red Sox Nation wants players who hustle and appear hungry; players who pull for one another and don’t complain about travel, snitches, or scoring decisions. After all the snow and cold of the wicked winter of 2012-13, most New England baseball fans are thrilled just to think about being warm outside again.

Continue to run players out of town months after you've finished the job? Check:

The Sox haven’t been home since Bobby Valentine’s 2012 wretches slinked out of town under the cover of darkness late last September (that was the night Bobby V said, “I think I would have kept the beer in the clubhouse. I could have used it after a few of these games”). Bobby’s trainwreck Townies staggered to the worst Boston baseball season in 47 years (69-93, 26 games out of first place), which triggered the overdue overhaul.

Take a dump on ownership and piss on general manager Larry Lucchino again for the old 1 - 2 combo? Check:

Positioning themselves as “scrappy underdogs” (another Lucchino beauty), the $154 million payroll Red Sox launched their 2013 campaign with an 8-2 victory in Yankee Stadium one week ago. After starts of 0-6 (2011) and 1-5 (2012), the Sox come home with a 4-2 record, winning their first two series for the first time since 2006 — when everybody loved the Red Sox and the “new” owners.

The local landscape is very different now.

Presumably because of all the snow melting from the brutal New England winter...

Hype the new manager so Shank can help write his memoirs once he gets shitcanned? Big freakin' check!

Mindful of an angry fan base, the Sox spent the winter/spring apologizing to fans and asking forgiveness in the form of two-for-one hot dogs and reduced beer prices in April. They issued offseason slogans of “What’s Broken Can Be Fixed’’ and “162 Chances to Restore The Faith.’’ New manager John (Wayne) Farrell was summoned to clean up the Valentine mess and told fans, “It’s a whole new ballgame,’’ in a NESN spot that paints the 2013 team as “workmanlike” and “professional.’’

The last words go to The Duke:

“We had a tremendous spring training,’’ Farrell said after Sunday’s rout. “To go through New York and Toronto is a good start. We’re going to give effort and energy every time we walk on the field. We’re going to play with an intensity that should work in our favor. We’re looking forward to going home and getting before our home crowd. Hopefully, these six games will energize the fans even more than they normally would be.’’

Saddle up!

Battered Fan Syndrome

Now that the Red Sox are on a roll, Shank waxes estatic about how awesome our Red Sox are.

We love baseball. We love the Red Sox. Nothing else explains the wonderful, wacky reception the Sox received Monday in their 113th home opener, a 3-1 victory over the Baltimore Orioles.

You can insult the fandom. You can treat people as if they are imbeciles and win 69 games. You can produce the worst season in a generation (47 years). You can offend the sensibilities of smart people. It doesn’t matter. Give us a shred of hope and we are hooked.

The woebegone Red Sox are 5-2 and in sole possession of first place in the American League East. So now it looks like the pennant. Print the World Series tickets. And should the World Series reception be held at the JFK Library or the Museum of Fine Arts?

“This is a Red Sox town,’’ said Boston’s outgoing mayor, Thomas Menino, as he patrolled Level 3 behind home plate in the early innings. “Boston fans love the team. They are going to follow the team. We’re going to follow this team to a rolling rally in October.

“The Red Sox are part of the DNA of Boston. We always come back. We love the team.’’

We always come back.

I can't emphasize this point enough - just wait until the first two or three game losing skid, and Shank will be trashing everyone in the Red Sox organization from John Henry to the grounds crew.

Singin' Shank

The multi-talented Dan Shaughnessy sings the national anthems at the April 6 Canadiens-Bruins game. Is there anything that man can't do?

Overreaction - II

Shank trashed the 2012 Boston Red Sox for the entire playing year and the past offseason. Now that the 2013 Red Sox have a two game winning streak? Best. team. Evah!

NEW YORK — They may never lose.

They may never trail.

Worst to first. Two games into the season, this is the theme of the 2013 Red Sox.

And is it possible for Jackie Bradley Jr. to be the Face of the Franchise after only two games in the big leagues?

That depends - how many column inches you have on him so far?

Pump some air into the Duck Boat tires. Get going with the 2013 commemorative bricks. Maybe the phony sellout streak will live longer than we thought.

That's right, folks - Bandwagon Dan changed his tune on the current version of the Olde Town Team from last place laughingstock to write-in World Series favorite in under two weeks.

Do I even have to ask what Shank will be writing with the first three game losing streak?

Overreaction

The 2013 Boston Red Sox win in Yankee Stadium yesterday on Opening Day, and Shank's doing cartwheels:

NEW YORK — First walk. First hustle on the basepaths. First strikeout. First run. First RBI. First “tremendous” catch.

How long before Dr. Charles Steinberg produces “The Ballad of Jackie Bradley Jr.?’’

How long before Yawkey Way is renamed JBJ Way?

How long before we’re eating loaves of Jackie Bradley Jr. Bread?

The kid made his major-league debut Monday afternoon and was instrumental in the Red Sox’ 8-2 Opening Day thrashing of the New York Yankees. In his first big-league plate appearance, in the second inning, Bradley turned an 0-and-2 count into a hard-earned walk off CC Sabathia that triggered a four-run Red Sox rally. Bradley beat shortstop Eduardo Nunez’s throw to second when Jose Iglesias followed with a hit into the hole. Bradley knocked in an insurance run in the seventh, doing his job when he batted in a first-and-third, one-out situation. He walked three times and saw 26 pitches in five plate appearances. He made a catch that reminded old-timers of Yaz’s iconic grab in the ninth inning of Billy Rohr’s major league debut, a one-hitter in April of 1967 at Yankee Stadium.

Speaking of 1967:

It’s 1967 all over again. The Cardiac Kids had rookies named Reggie Smith and Mike Andrews. They went from ninth place to Boston’s first pennant in 21 years. They had a first-year manager who said, “We’ll win more than we lose.’’ And they had a rookie pitcher who hurled a one-hitter in his big-league debut in Yankee Stadium in April.

Leading up to Opening Day, Shank was wondering which team would be finishing in last place; today the Cardiac Kids have been resurrected. So much for consistency.

Turn On A Dime Dan - VII?

Yesterday Shank was trashing the 2013 Red Sox before they played a single game, stating that "chemistry in a baseball clubhouse is way overrated." Today he writes an otherwise good column on Jackie Bradley Jr., starting his first game in the major leagues as the left fielder. Maybe I'm reading it wrong, but you tell me:

NEW YORK — The worst Red Sox season in a generation angered and alienated a large, loyal fan base and gave way to an offseason of overpayment for ballplayers of character and experience. Expectations have been lowered and the club’s winter/spring ad campaign begged forgiveness while promising a team that will try harder.

Monday the torch will be passed to Boston baseball’s future, and its name is Jackie Bradley Jr. With only 138 minor league games under his belt — none in Triple A — the soon-to-be 23-year-old Virginia native will be the Red Sox’ starting left fielder on Opening Day at Yankee Stadium.

Bradley is the perfect antidote for the infection that’s poisoned the Sox since September of 2011. Boston’s kid outfielder is a spotless soul with no baggage and no attachments to the hardball horrors that have plagued this franchise since the final days of Terry Francona and Theo Epstein.

In other words, this kid brings character and talent to the clubhouse.

Shane Victorino wraps up the column with a great quote:

Seeing the four-deep group of reporters gathered around Bradley’s locker Sunday, Victorino walked by and warned, “They love you now, but they’ll be [expletive] burying you within a week.’’

Welcome to Boston, kid.

And avoid talking to Dan Shaughnessy!