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Showing posts with label jackass. Show all posts
Showing posts with label jackass. Show all posts

Friday, January 07, 2022

DHL Dan CLXV - The Worst, Etc.

Now that the Boston Celtics have lost a few games, Shank sets his sights on the team:
The Celtics are the worst finishers in the NBA, and other thoughts

Picked-up pieces while assembling a shrine to Australian prime minister Scott Morrison …
More on this in a minute.
▪ So many topics, so little space.

One could rant about the ongoing Antonio Brown circus. One could ask for compassion for the much-traveled wideout, or simply conclude that AB is a manipulative liar and we should save our compassion for his multiple (alleged) victims and all those he has mistreated.

The Tampa Bay Bucs and Tom Brady get no compassion. They enabled Brown, did headstands to work around his baggage, lowered all standards in the quest for a championship, and ultimately deserve the predictable mess AB left behind.
Totally agree - AB's an asshole who burns nearly everyone he comes in contact with.
...

Then we have the 2021-22 Celtics, who have become the region’s most annoying and infuriating team since … last year’s Celtics.

What is it with these guys? Wednesday’s and Thursday’s losses to San Antonio and New York were as bad as it gets. No team blows leads like these guys. Six times in 16 days your Green Team lost games in which they had a lead or a tie in the fourth quarter. They are the worst finishers in the NBA. Thursday they blew a 25-point lead in New York and after the game their poor new coach said that they lack mental toughness.

If it makes you feel better, Bob Cousy sees the same things you see.
Read on for more of that, but I think his column leadoff was grating, and now for some outstanding commentary:
▪ The Novak Djokovic episode features the latest and thus far best handling of anti-vax athletes. Chris Sale, Aaron Rodgers, and even Irving all got their way when they put their personal freedom ahead of the health of their teammates and the good of their sport. Not so for Djokovic, who landed at the Melbourne airport with his vax exemption and was told “no.”

“Any individual seeking to enter Australia must comply with our border requirements,” said Morrison. “We await his presentation and what evidence he provides to support that. If that evidence is insufficient, then he won’t be treated any different to anyone else and he’ll be on the next plane home. There should be no special rules for Novak Djokovic at all. None whatsoever.”
Suffice to say, Shank barely knows any of the details here. Djokovic had some level of assurance from Tennis Austalia that things were a go and was in fact granted permission to enter the Australian province of Victoria via a medical exemption when the Australian Feds suddenly stepped in and decided without explanation or elaboration his papers were not in order. These and many other factors can be seen here and paint a decidely diffeerent picture of the situation than Mr. Branch Covidian here does. In his view, anti-vax athletes should be dealt with in this manner; ambush swift, harshly and with one level of appeal available to you, the aggrieved party. Completely ignored by both the Feds in Australia and by Shank - Novak has already had Covid-19 and thus far better immunity against future infection (also known as natural immunity) than from these so-called 'vaccines'. Is it a real 'vaccine' if the're recommending boosters every couple of months? People like Australian prime minister Scott Morrison and Shank are without doubt proponents of compulsory vaccination regardless of the facts.

Friday, September 17, 2021

Disingenuous Question Time

Do you have a minute or two for Shank's latest bullshit about the Boston Red Sox?
It’s not the losing or the defense that makes it hard for me to embrace these Red Sox — it’s something else

Are you loving these Red Sox?

They are right in the thick of things for a wild-card game — a one-game bakeoff vs. the Yankees or Blue Jays on Tuesday, Oct. 5. They would pitch indominable Chris Sale in that game, which means they could advance to the first round of the American League playoffs. That’s pretty good after a last-place finish in 2020.

So why have they not captured the love and loyalty of the region? What’s missing? What it is we do not trust about this Local Nine?
Please - this guy spent the past seven months criticizing and / or outright shitting the team on many levels and now has the nerve to churn out Grade A bullshit like this?

Saturday, August 29, 2020

Standing Small

Recent events compel Shank to criticize the 2020 Red Sox more than he usually does:
In a week of American protest and crisis, the Red Sox stood small
The quaint notion that what has happened in Kenosha and elsewhere this week are mere protests is world class sophistry. These are riots by any reasonable / logical definition. Look at this guy's thread and tell me otherwise. Andy Ngo's by far and away the number one chronicler of these riots that Shank and other media rumpswabs try to pass off as protests. False premises like this need to be taken out back and tossed in the dumpster.
The Red Sox are not only a horrible baseball team, they are also ever-divided. And really hard to like.

After playing a game Wednesday — the day the NBA shut down and three major league games were postponed — the Sox had a team vote Thursday and agreed to stand behind Jackie Bradley Jr., who had told his teammates he wasn’t going to play Thursday. In the early hours after the decision to boycott was announced, Sox outfielder Kevin Pillar and reliever Ryan Brasier made their true feelings known.

Participating in a Zoom news conference, Pillar said, “It was not an easy decision for a lot of us . . . We all have different beliefs. We don’t agree on everything . . . I don’t think right now, as a country, we should be necessarily identifying individual groups of people that need to be uplifted . . . ’'
Worth noting - the presence of these ellipses suggest / confirm that Shank (or the guy he copied it from) is doing what's known in the recording business as sampling; in other words using parts and sections potentially taken out of context and other pertinent and inconvenient facts removed for maximum negative impact. That said, I see nothing incendiary about those two semi-sentences. Clumsy for sure, but that's it.

Not to be outdone:
A few hours after Pillar spoke, Brasier retweeted a video mocking Doc Rivers’s emotional response to the Jacob Blake shooting in Kenosha, Wis. It’s truly hateful and appalling stuff. See if you can find it. Search Twitter for Hodgetwins — conservative comedians with almost 600,000 followers. Brasier evidently is a big fan. Pinky Higgins would be so proud. Color me haunted.

Brasier’s retweet was discovered Friday by NBC Sports Boston’s John Tomase. Brasier did not respond to Tomase’s request for comment, but he deleted the retweet from his timeline. Ron Roenicke said that Brasier reached out to Bradley and the Sox manager to explain his actions. Wonder what Brasier would say to Rivers, whose father was a cop.
I'm sort of two minds with this guy and what he did - on the one hand, getting in trouble for a retweet seems incredibly petty. On the other hand (and the one I'm going with) is that Brasier's always seemed like a knucklehead to me and this merely provides confirmation. Doc Rivers is a class guy par excellence and that was a no-thought classless thing to do.

No, I did not miss the Pinky Higgins reference / name drop -of course not! I'm not a baseball historian / aficionado like my co-blogger, but the guy sounds like a real winner (please note the sarcasm, folks!). You'll see some other name drops later on that you're going to love...
I spoke with Sox baseball boss Chaim Bloom after midnight Friday.

“I talked to Ryan about this today,’' said Bloom. “He was very apologetic and regretted the timing, and the message that the timing sent. He took down one of those tweets and spent time having a lot of conversations in our clubhouse with people he felt he needed to have conversations with. He was upset and regretful about the entire thing . . . This wasn’t something that we felt warranted discipline. He made a mistake, but once he did I think he took a lot of the right steps to try to make amends.’'

This is so Boston Red Sox. In a week of American protest and crisis, the Sox stood small while so many around them demonstrated dignity and unity. While America paused to take a long look in the mirror, the Red Sox provided division and continuation of a culture that has long plagued the Boston baseball franchise.
Again, these aren't protests anymore; they are riots, complete with bullhorns, looting, fire and physical assault, and they haven't been 'protests' for quite a while to the degree they ever were. Siding with rioters and calling it 'dignity and unity' seems to have things like priorities seriously inverted. Fortunately these riots are largely confined to ten or fifteen downtown areas of certain major American cities controlled by Democrats lock stock and barrel for a period on average equivalent to my age.
“You bring any group of this many people together, you’re bound to have people with different views and different thoughts,’' said Bloom. “Peaceful protests are about changing minds. If we can’t look at progress that gets made towards a goal in a room of people with very different opinions — if we can’t look at that and see progress, then we’re undermining our own goals.’'

“We don’t demand that everyone have the same political opinion,’' added Sox CEO Sam Kennedy.

Good. This is America. You are not obligated to agree with everyone else, and a big league ball club doesn’t release a player for being a dumbbell.
Everyone got that? Now watch this:
But why can’t Pillar and Brasier keep their different views behind closed doors? This was an opportunity to back a teammate without pushing one’s own agenda. Most other teams presented as unified. Would a little unity from the Red Sox be too much to ask?
Pillar was asked a question and presented his own viewpoint, albeit roughly. Braiser? He's a knob and not getting a pass on that - a lot of times shut the fuck up is the better part of valor. That said, Shank just contradicted himself in consecutive sentences, and not for the first time.
I truly wish these 2020 Red Sox could play in front of fans at Fenway. It would expose them to the boos they so richly deserve. And not just because they are 10-22. They remind me of the loathsome Joe Kerrigan Red Sox of 2001. Mike Lansing. Carl Everett. You remember those guys, right?
An awesome blast from the past! Behold, the Bing results from typing in 'curly haired boyfriend' - this post is now writing itself!
These Sox certainly honor the ball club’s time-tested legacy of “25 players, 25 cabs.” They have only one Black player, just as they did when they were baseball’s last team to integrate 60 years ago. And they can’t seem to agree on anything.

Remember last year when the defending world champs were summoned to be honored at the White House? All the white guys went to Washington. With the exception of J.D. Martinez and Sandy Leon, all the Sox persons of color stayed home.
That's because it has become a politicized event, aided and abetted by media members like Shank.
Opening night at Fenway, 2020? All the visiting Orioles took a knee during a pregame presentation dedicated to Black Lives Matter. Six Red Sox kneeled — Bradley, Michael Chavis, Alex Verdugo, and three coaches who are men of color. Everybody else stood.

Now we have the last-place Sox stacking loss after loss like a pile of cord wood, then going public with clubhouse division during a week of protest and reflection by every team in every sport.

After Friday afternoon’s unfortunate flurry, Bradley, Brasier, and the rest of the Red Sox participated in a pregame ceremony at Fenway commemorating Jackie Robinson’s first day in baseball. When all players stood at attention, I couldn’t help but wonder what Ryan Brasier was thinking.
I alluded to this point two posts ago, but it bears repeating and a bit more expansion - there's a big difference between overt, direct acts of racism like barring people from businesses, pro sports teams and the like (which I see little to no evidence of in modern American society today) and in the case of Jacob Blake in Kenosha (which apparently triggered this latest pro sports boycotting this week), claiming solidarity with a black man wielding a knife and roaming around menacing other people and when white cops intervene lots of people freak out and call the cops every fucking name in the book. These two things could not be any more different from each other but here we are with some degree of American citizens accusing law enforcement and those who support them of the most vile and wicked motives and behaviour for the act of doing their jobs.

I'm quite sure we don't need to 'reflect' on the notion that thugs are allowed to rampage certain American cities and call the cops racists for doing their jobs.

Monday, October 21, 2019

Backfire

Presented without comment:

Tuesday, September 03, 2019

DHL Dan LXXXVIII - The One Where Shank Complains About Nearly Everything

You know what the result is of Shank taking a mini-vacation towards the end of the summer? A picked-up pieces column, of course!

What is amazing about this particular 'effort'is that Shank manages to complain about damn near everything under the sun, including Major League Baseball, the Red Sox, TB12, other NFL franchises (sans 'Tomato Can' references), and sundry others. He's one miserable dude, but you knew that already.

Thursday, June 21, 2018

There Goes The Bruins Neighborhood

Full disclosure - I cannot fucking stand Jack Edwards. I find him forced, way over the top most of the time and his use of the same fucking phrases over and over and fucking over nauseates me to no end ('saucer pass, D to D, over the spoked B, off the half boards and the shot's into the protective netting'). Like 'netting' just might imply 'protective', you fucking braying jackass! If I watch a Bruins game, it's either with the TV sound off or I tune 98.5 The Sports Hub and listen to their audio instead.

Now that that's off my chest, I have some really bad news for those of you who hate Edwards as much as I do:
Naturally, Shank likes the move:

Sunday, January 15, 2017

That's Why They Play The Game

Shank backtracks sharply from a week long belittling of the Houston Texans and a Saturday night of 'tomato can' tweets, and recognizes that things don't always turn out as expected.
FOXBOROUGH — The Patriots lurched to a 34-16 victory over the Houston Texans Saturday night and next Sunday will play in their record sixth consecutive AFC Championship game. A home victory over the Chiefs or Steelers is all that stands in the way of the Pats making it to Super Bowl LI in Houston Feb. 5.

Swell. But if Saturday’s game made you feel good about your team, you must be wearing Tom Brady’s Under Armour pajamas. Call it a warning shot or a wake-up call. The sloppy slugfest furnishes fodder for those who wonder if the 2016-17 Patriots — now 15-2 — are championship-driven, or merely fortunate sons of the AFC East, the softest schedule in the league, and the presence of the ever-beatable Texans.
Read on for a column chock full of Shankisms and the standard game recap.

Stolen from the comments is a new nickname - 'Tomato Can Dan'. It's catchy!

Saturday, July 16, 2016

Eight Men Out

Shank goes a century back in time to recount the Chicago Black Sox scandal, from the hotel room where it all happened:
ROOM 615, BUCKMINSTER HOTEL — This is where the greatest professional sports scandal in American history went down. Bigger than Deflategate. Right in the very spot where I am sitting.

I am talking about the Black Sox scandal of 1919. And I am sitting in the spot where the idea was hatched. Right here in the shadow of the Citgo sign (it wasn’t there in 1919). My room is less than 300 feet from the Green Monster, which was part of the landscape in 1919 when Chicago White Sox first baseman Chick Gandil sat with Hub gambler Joseph “Sport” Sullivan and agreed to get some teammates to throw the upcoming World Series against the Cincinnati Reds.
It's a good read, but Shank simply can't help himself and mars it by mentioning Deflategate one more time, as well as working in a reference to the chicken & beer fiasco five years ago.

Thursday, July 07, 2016

The One Where Shank Talks To Baseball Prospectus

Tim Britton at Baseball Prospectus sits down with Our Man Shank and cover a lot of ground. Some highlights:
TB: How have you seen your relationship with guys change as your profile has gotten larger?

DS: I just worry that the young guys are instructed, "Watch out for this guy. He's trouble." I like everybody to make up their own mind.
...
TB: Do you view your column as an extension of your personality, or do you sometimes play a character?

DS: ...I probably do the elbow-in-the-ribs-in-the-elevator every now and then just because it feels good. But I mean, don't love [the team] more than your families. What's in the column is how I feel at the time. It's not to get clicks or trolling. I love how trolling has become, "I disagree with you, therefore you're trolling." It's anything that's not my opinion. I don't even know what trolling is except if you say something that's different.
...
TB: What nickname that you've been given do you mind the least?

DS: I basically accept everything. The mayor of Hartford called me a Chia pet, which I thought was pretty good. Obviously, Carl Everett with Curly-Haired Boyfriend. I thought that was pretty clever. Clif Keane is the guy who first took me up here, he covered the '46 Red Sox in the World Series. He liked Holy Cross guys and he was good to me. He would come back later and sit back there and he called me the baby-faced assassin. I liked that one. I wore that one with honor.

The Shank thing started with the Celtics (incorrect - ed.). I think Kevin McHale probably invented that, and I loved those guys. When I hear it from them, it feels like a term of endearment. When it's out in the street and WEEI listeners, not so much.
Nice of Shank to lie about his primary nickname because it makes him look like less of a backstabbing jackass.

Thursday, June 30, 2016

Great Free Agency Calls, By Dan Shaughnessy

Dan Shaughnessy, on the roster needs of the Boston Bruins, three days ago:
I say, “Go Big or Go Home.”

Make a splash. No more talk about “assets.’’ Get some proven players. Durant. Butler. Cousins. Stamkos. Subban.

Now.
I bet you're wondering just how well those two calls turned out?
(Steve) Stamkos surrendered his free agency Wednesday. He agreed to an eight-year, $68 million contract with the Tampa Bay Lightning, according to a person with knowledge of the deal. The person requested anonymity because the contract has not been announced. Although he would have become an unrestricted free agent Friday, Stamkos realized his best move was to stay put.surrendered his free agency Wednesday. He agreed to an eight-year, $68 million contract with the Tampa Bay Lightning, according to a person with knowledge of the deal. The person requested anonymity because the contract has not been announced. Although he would have become an unrestricted free agent Friday, Stamkos realized his best move was to stay put.
...
After the P.K. Subban-for-Shea Weber trade, the Predators have the Warriors’ same winning combination of an innovative system and the personnel to execute it. And like Steve Kerr’s system, Peter Lavioette’s succeeds by redefining positions. It allows defensemen to play more like forwards, pinching as far as the goal line in the offensive zone and carrying the puck end-to-end. Granted, Nashville is not the only team to give their defensemen the green light to do this, but the Predators make it a feature, with at least one player abandoning the blue line on every offensive possession.
I can understand not knowing about the Subban trade, as it seems to have caught a lot of people off guard, but you would think a sports columnist may have read a column or two about Stamkos' situation and wondered if it would be a good thing for him to leave a perennial playoff team. Not Shank, apparently.

Friday, April 01, 2016

Asking The Important Questions

Gee, this is a tough one...

Sunday, January 24, 2016

Embarassing Tweets, By Dan Shaughnessy

Is Shank really watching this game?



Except it was a) Bill Belichick that, you know, threw the challenge flag, and b) Gostkowski kicking a field goal in the second quarter. Other than that, the tweet was accurate!

UPDATE AT 5:00 PM - The commenters are giving him the business:








Second Guessing A Second Time

Shank, January 3rd:



Shank, about fifteen minutes ago:



Shank sure does enjoy his role as the Globe's resident asshole...

Troll Level - High

Shank's bringing his A game today:





UPDATE AT 3:31 PM - One more for good measure:



UPDATE AT 3:41 PM Just remember - you don't have to be consistent to be a troll!

Two For Two

How predictable is Shank? This predictable:

It Begins

The sun will rise, the sun will set, and Shank will tweet about a coin flip before a Patriots game:



...which is an improvement - a month ago, Shank deemed this an impossibility.

T Minus Two Hours...

The New England Patriots and the Denver Broncos will kick off in under two hours at Sports Authority Field in Denver, and we don't have any stupid, pedestrian and repetitive tweets from Shank regarding the coin flip and or the double score. Is he holding out on us, depriving this site of mockable material, or has he become (like Skynet) self-aware and realize what a jackass these tweets make him look like?

Tune in at 3:00, folks!

Thursday, July 09, 2015

Dumb Red Sox Tweets, By Dan Shaughnessy



If Carter's been doing this hop-step pitching all year, he would have faced a potential total of 84 different umpires, any of whom could have cited this delivery as illegal. A preliminary search does not indicate that any MLB umpire has raised an issue with his delivery, and this column states that MLB has weighed in on the matter and determined that it 'it's legal, more or less'.

If only Shank had done a basic Google search before running his mouth, or had a freaking editor, he wouldn't have had to embarrass himself yet again.

UPDATE AT 4:48 PM - From the second link, the relevant rule on an illegal pitch states, in part - "An illegal pitch when runners are on base is a balk." From the first link, Capps has no balks called against him in 2015. That's just further evidence of Shank's complete lack of research & due diligence with that stupid tweet.

Friday, January 09, 2015

Both Sides Of His Mouth

Wow - this column is classic Shaughnessy! The U.S. Olympic Committee is looking for a chump loser host city for the 2024 Summer Olympics and for some ungodly reason, chose Boston as the potential host city.

Let's hear more from Shank, still catching his breath:
The winning streak continues. The High Renaissance of Boston sports is extended, perhaps all the way to 2024, which would represent the full first quarter of the 21st century.

It’s not just about the Patriots, Red Sox, Celtics, and Bruins anymore. The United States Olympic Committee Thursday selected Boston as the city that America will put forward for consideration as the host for the 2024 Summer Games.

Two years from now, the International Olympic Committee will select a host city from among a field that is expected to include Rome, Paris, Berlin . . . and Boston, the Sports Hub of the Universe.
Funny, that's not what he was saying six months ago:
Stop the madness. Please. Can we have no more noise about the Olympics coming to Boston in 2024? Can we cease and desist with the preposterous notion that this is a reasonable, fiscally-feasible project?

We do not need the Summer Olympics. We already are a world-class city. What we need is bridge repair, housing, better public schools, an improved MBTA, and programs for the disenfranchised. We need better ways to get in and out of our city. We do not need an event that would strangle us financially and logistically for decades.
So, like our former Senator John Kerry, he was against it, before he was for it!

Examined logically, nothing that Shank raised as concerns has happened in those six months - no bridges were repaired, no schools got better, no improvements on the MBTA - that would cause a rational person to change his opinion on this issue. And then there's Shank...

But wait! What's this bit, further down today's column?
And yet the committee selected Boston, a clogged city with a cranky constituency, no downtown stadium, and a well-oiled resistance (I remain a card-carrying member) to the wild and crazy notion of hosting the Olympics.
So, now he likes the idea of Boston hosting the Olympics, but just not the event itself. Got it!