Rewriting History - IV

The New York Yankees arrived yesterday to play a three game series against the Red Sox. Our Man Shank was there to focus on former Sox outfielder Jacoby Ellsbury:

Let’s play Sports Jeopardy.

Answer: Johnny Damon, Adam Vinatieri, Ray Allen . . . Jacoby Ellsbury.

Question: Name four Boston athletes who performed admirably in championship seasons, then were booed by Hub fans because they returned to Boston wearing the wrong laundry.

Ellsbury’s handsome head was added to the Rushmore of Fan Stupidity Tuesday night when the majority of Red Sox fans in attendance gave him the old Bronx cheer when he came to bat against former teammate Jon Lester leading off the first inning at Fenway.

This guy says they were 'kinda sorta', 'half-assed' boos, so I'm inclined to believe that Shank's exaggerating here.

What's halfway interesting about this column is Shank's newfound appreciation for Ellsbury:

And in the distance, I could swear I heard Bob Lobel ask, “Why can’t we get players like that?’’

...

He’s never going to tell us if he harbors any bad feelings about his medical treatment from the Sox staff or the team’s indifference when he became a free agent last winter. It’s kind of admirable.

I wonder if he's ever going to tell us if he harbors any bad feelings about certain Boston Globe sports columnists?

Rewriting History - II

Shank's Friday column takes a look at Jacoby Ellsbury, now a member of the New York Yankees. Now that the Boston Globe has finally dropped their paywall, you once again have the pleasure of reading Shaughnessy's unabridged works of art in their entirety. I'll just highlight the more amusing part(s):

Still, it would be great to have Dr. Charles Steinberg roll out an Ellsbury video montage when the Bombers come to Fenway. We’d love another look at his electrifying steal of home at Fenway against a stunned Andy Pettitte. We could watch all those homers (32) from 2011 when Ellsbury was runner-up for the American League MVP Award. Maybe we’d get another look at his four-hit World Series game against the Rockies when he was a Xander Bogaerts-like call-up at the end of the 2007 season.

Compare and contrast this seemingly affectionate tone about Ellsbury to that of a mere nineteen months ago:

Ellsbury has three homers in 62 games this year. He is hitting .268. Ellsbury is the greatest flight risk since Whitey Bulger, and the Sox are not going to contend next year with him in center field.

The Sox must trade Ellsbury this winter. Scott Boras thinks Ellsbury is a $20 million-per-year player. Maybe last year. But Ellsbury has missed 1½ of the last three seasons and is going the wrong way. He’s not even Carl Crawford this season. Trade the dude.

Back to today's column:

Ellsbury was a terrific player for the Red Sox any time he was on the field. The only problem was the slow healing and the long stretches when he was on the shelf. But let the record show that he played with a broken bone in his foot in the 2013 playoffs. And his major injuries came as the result of hard play — the collision with Adrian Beltre in 2010, and the shoulder-crushing play at second base in the home opener in 2012.

Jacoby Ellsbury, the terrific player in 2013:

We know the negatives. Ellsbury gets hurt and he’s slow to come back from injuries. He missed 144 games with broken ribs in 2010. He injured his shoulder and missed 88 games last year. Both injuries were results of collisions from playing hard, but he’s stuck with the image of a pampered baseball softy.

And when Ellsbury's not on the field?

Shank can't seem to write a story about positive things, like the Bruins' 3 - 0 win over the Pittsburgh Penguins last night, so instead he returns to beating the crap out of Jacoby Ellsbury. The reader is tipped off almost immediately:

This is not a rip job on Ellsbury. There’s no calling into question Ellsbury’s toughness or willingness to play hurt.

Then Shank proceeds to rip Ellsbury:

No need for MLB.com columnist Tom Werner to run to the keyboard and defend his player. Ellsbury missed the first two games of the Yankee showdown this weekend, but he’s played in 54 of 57 games in 2013. He’s practically been Cal Ripken Jr. Let’s call him Iron Man Ellsbury. Everyday Ells.

Nope, no rip job here!

Today's column is nothing more than Shank weakly trying to airbrush his previous columns on Ellsbury. I am becoming more convinced that Shank's being asked or told what to write, and in what tone to write it, when he does columns about the Red Sox. I believe his future columns this season will bear this theory out.

Lineup

As Red Sox spring training progresses, we get closer and closer to starting actual games, like the ones against Boston College and Northeastern University on Thursday. Shank takes a column to consider the possibilities.

FORT MYERS, Fla. — Red Sox hitting coach Greg Colbrunn doesn’t have a recipe for a new leadoff hitter. What he knows is that this powerful lineup that produced a league-best 853 runs in 2013 will look different, but not necessarily worse.

He can’t mix Shane Victorino with Dustin Pedroia and a little Grady Sizemore and come up with another Jacoby Ellsbury. Not possible. The speed, the disruptive nature of Ellsbury’s game, that’s gone.

Shank didn't seem terribly concerned in 2010, when Ellsbury wasn't in the lineup.

Ellsbury accounted for 92 of those 853 runs, fifth among leadoff hitters. But the excitement he brings, the pressure on the pitcher, and his defense are gone.

Dan was definitely excited the last time Ellsbury was gone from the lineup for an extended period:

It’s impossible and unfair to measure another man’s pain. Some professional ballplayers play hurt, while others wait until they are 100 percent before they step on the field. Jacoby Ellsbury broke five ribs back in April and he’s the only person who knows the extent of his pain at this hour.

But the situation with the Red Sox and Ellsbury has become absurd. The Sox are falling fast against mediocre competition and Ellsbury is still on the disabled list even though he’s played five games of minor league ball, and Sunday went 2 for 5, almost jumping out of McCoy Stadium in pursuit of a Durham Bull home run.

The only thing Shank will miss about Ellsbury is having a target.

Shank, Unshaved - II

Here's the obligatory Shank column on the Ellsbury trade.

Shank, Unshaved

Just when I was a few weeks away from mailing Shank a shaving kit:

Free-agent outfielder Jacoby Ellsbury has reached agreement on a seven-year contract with the New York Yankees pending a physical exam, a baseball source told ESPN.com.

According to multiple reports, the deal will pay Ellsbury $153 million over seven years and includes an option for an eighth year that could increase the overall value of the contract to $169 million. Ellsbury's deal exceeds Carl Crawford's seven-year, $142 million contract with the Boston Red Sox in December 2010.

Which was precisely what Scott Boras, Ellsbury's agent, was looking for.

For those who don't remember what Shank said about Ellsbury during spring training, it's right here:

Jacoby Ellsbury is the greatest flight risk in the history of baseball. There is no way he will be playing for the Red Sox next spring.

I’d bet my hair on it.

I tell him so in the clubhouse at JetBlue Park.

“Everybody knows you are gone,’’ I say. “If you’re still here next year, I’ll shave my head.’’

“Go for it,’’ says Ellsbury.

No problem. My hair is safe. Like everybody else around here, I know there is no chance Ellsbury will be with the Red Sox next year.

The Hunt For October

Now that the Boston Red Sox have taken three of four from the New York Yankees, Shank looks forward a few weeks, as the Red Sox are all but assured of a playoff spot.

NEW YORK — It’s not about the day-to-day wins and losses anymore. It’s about October.

In another year, the end of Sunday’s Red Sox-Yankees game might make us reach into the Way Back Machine and speak of Bob Stanley clanging a wild pitch off the glove of Rich Gedman. We might be talking about buzzard luck, September swoons, and damn Yankees.

Not this time. Not now.

The Sox were beaten by the Yankees, 4-3, and allowed the winning run to score when Brandon Workman uncorked a high heater off the mitt of Jarrod Saltalamacchia with Ichiro Suzuki on third and two outs in the bottom of the ninth.

By the way, did you know Jacoby Ellsbury has a foot injury? We can't have too many reminders:

But the bigger news was the announcement that Jacoby Ellsbury has a compression fracture in his right foot. The Sox say he’ll play again this season, but we’ve been down this path before.

Yes, we have, and many times before that, every time Ellsbury's been injured, in fact.

And just in case you missed it the first time in the column:

But as good as things look right now, the uncertainty about Ellsbury is going to dog them for the rest of the regular season.

What about the uncertainty about Clay Buchholz? Shank's not terribly interested in that angle. This is just further evidence that at all times, Shank needs at least one member of the Red Sox, past or present, to beat the crap out of.

Foot Fault

Let's pretend, shall we?

Let's pretend The CHB cared about something more than a paycheck, free drinks at The Fours and alienating sports fans for being sports fans.

Let's pretend Shank isn't mocking when he says the "good scenario is [Jacoby Ellsbury] leads the Sox to a World Series title, then sign[s] a long-term contract extension and gets his No. 2 on the right-field facade ...."

Let's pretend Shank didn't compare the loss of Ellsbury to the loss of Jim Rice late in the '75 season, and that he didn't write the Sox lost "firepower" when Rice went down. Let's pretend The CHB had looked up the research and learned that in his place Bernie Carbo hit .429, slugged 1.429 and hit 2 homers in Rice's place, and had Dick Williams played him more, the World Series that year might have had a very different outcome.

Let's pretend a Sox player could have an injury without The CHB, in describing it, dredging up every single negative thing that ever happened to said player.

Let's pretend Shank is a real human being.

Then let's get back to reality, because pretending is for kids, not for adult sports fans, and certainly not for over-the-hill sportswriters who so clearly hate sports.

Rip Job?

Shank can't seem to write a story about positive things, like the Bruins' 3 - 0 win over the Pittsburgh Penguins last night, so instead he returns to beating the crap out of Jacoby Ellsbury. The reader is tipped off almost immediately:

This is not a rip job on Ellsbury. There’s no calling into question Ellsbury’s toughness or willingness to play hurt.

Then Shank proceeds to rip Ellsbury:

No need for MLB.com columnist Tom Werner to run to the keyboard and defend his player. Ellsbury missed the first two games of the Yankee showdown this weekend, but he’s played in 54 of 57 games in 2013. He’s practically been Cal Ripken Jr. Let’s call him Iron Man Ellsbury. Everyday Ells.

Nope, no rip job here!

You're Outta Here!

Shank's favorite Red Sox whipping post, Jacoby Ellsbury, is in the final year of his contract. Shank's 100 percent sure Ellsbury will test the free agent market when the 2013 season's over. So sure, in fact...

FORT MYERS, Fla. — Jacoby Ellsbury is the greatest flight risk in the history of baseball. There is no way he will be playing for the Red Sox next spring.

I’d bet my hair on it.

I tell him so in the clubhouse at JetBlue Park.

“Everybody knows you are gone,’’ I say. “If you’re still here next year, I’ll shave my head.’’

“Go for it,’’ says Ellsbury.

No problem. My hair is safe. Like everybody else around here, I know there is no chance Ellsbury will be with the Red Sox next year.

Nothing wrong with that. It’s just a fact.

Ellsbury is polite, but he’s weary of the contract question. It must be weird to go into a season when you know . . . and your teammates know . . . and all of the fans know that you are gone at the end of the year.

I don't quite buy these assertions, but Ellsbury's agent is Scott Boras, who's known for playing hardball and testing the free agent market (this is mentioned later in the column).

We know the negatives. Ellsbury gets hurt and he’s slow to come back from injuries. He missed 144 games with broken ribs in 2010. He injured his shoulder and missed 88 games last year. Both injuries were results of collisions from playing hard, but he’s stuck with the image of a pampered baseball softy.

It's difficult to understand exactly how Jacoby Ellsbury got stuck with the label of a pampered baseball softy. A complete mystery...

Short at Center

Today, Mr. Grumpy has in his sights Jacoby Ellsbury, calling him "greatest flight risk since Whitey Bulger."

Now, yes, it is just a tad extreme to compare a baseball player to the man who topped the FBI's Most Wanted list for years, and who is accused of murdering more than a dozen people. Then again, excrement extreme is what The CHB is known for.

But Shank's crystal ball tells him that the Red Sox are "not going to contend next year with him in center field." Never mind that Ellsbury was runnerup in the AL MVP race just last year. Clearly, he sucks.

The CHB insists the Sox "must trade" Ellsbury immediately, but in the next breath notes Ellsbury's apparent brittleness and lack of performance: "He’s not even Carl Crawford this season. Trade the dude." How are the Sox to get quality in return for this apparent sack of crap? The CHB never gets around to saying. Keep in mind, Shank was the one who insisted the Red Sox keep Kevin Youkilis, who is just as brittle as Ellsbury (not to mention older and less valuable), and for whom the Red Sox already had more-than-capable replacements, and whined like a two-year-old that they didn't get enough in return for him. But no matter. That was two months ago, and drinking does hamper the memory.
 
And The CHB cites Bill Ballou of the Worcester Telegram. Is that the same Bill Ballou who has repeatedly said Bill James has been right? The same Bill James The CHB routinely mocks?

Parting shots: "ESPN was here, Wednesday night, which meant sharing the press box, elevator and media bathroom with Nomar Garciaparra and Curt Schilling. That’s a lot of awkward for one night, don’t you think?" Only if you are, you know, a dick.