Friday, October 26, 2007

Those darn clueless newbies!

Since the Sox are playing so well, Dan directs snide remarks towards his newest target - those pesky bandwagon fans. Those idiot fans could not possibly conceive that the Sox might actually fall behind for a few innings--imagine the shock. Darn those fans for actually having the audacity to shell out big bucks to buy tickets and show up for a World Series Game. (I find this amusing--here is a man who gets paid to come to Fenway to watch the games for free and he takes jabs at paying customers?) I wonder how Shaughnessy tells the difference between bandwagon jumpers and the regulars anyway? Do they let out a different type of gasp? Do they not know the words to Sweet Caroline? Perhaps it is simply the case that he was not cursed as much when he made his rounds through the stadium?

As for those fabulous Sox, Shank writes

These Sox are unlike any Boston baseball team since the earliest years of Fenway Park. They have won five consecutive postseason games, six straight World Series games, and they're taking a 2-0 Series lead to Coors Field for the resumption of the 103d Fall Classic tomorrow night.

Well, this is a long way from just nine days ago when he wrote

There's just so much working against your team. It's hard to be positive. And even though the Sox aren't done yet, some of us are already at work carving up the blame pie (speaking of pies, a Cleveland sportscaster did his postgame TV show wearing a cream pie on his head late Tuesday)......It doesn't feel like we are watching a team that can crawl out of this hole

It is also curious how he calls them "these Sox" - since he says they have won six World Series games in a row, he must be combining them with the Red Sox of 2004 which then must also include the 2005 and 2006 Sox--one team that got routed in the playoffs by the White Sox and the other did not make the playoffs and they are teams that Shank has roundly criticized. Dan's thought process is fundamentally flawed but he has never been one to let the facts get in the way of a good story line.

Finally now that Okajima is back and doing great, let's dust off the horse analogy from earlier in the year--you know when Okajima was a stable mate for the more famous Japanese hurler? No credit for Theo and the minions on this one, Shank? Just last week, you were quick to point out

Dan Duquette assembled half of the 2004 champs, but what we are looking at today is almost exclusively Theo's team and it's his most recent acquisitions who have been exposed thus far in October.
So when the players are bad, we get shots at the minions and always shots at Bill James. But when they are good, no credit to go around. Typical pathetic Shaughnessy


mike_b1 said...

The question in all this is, Is Shaughnessy truly pathological? And, how do his editors keep from hurting themselves when they fall on the floor laughing at his tripe?

Mario said...

Surely Shaughnessy's deliberately winding people up with this rubbish - nobody could be this stupid or short of memory.

Jenjifer said...

It was 48 degrees and felt like the Turnpike could have been covered with snow from Stockbridge to Boston.

Christ, is CHB writing this for a Freshman Comp class? Really, that man needs to be stopped.

dbvader said...

"There was brief confusion at Fenway Park last night. Under clearing October skies, a streaking Comet Holmes, and a Jackie Gleason moon,

That particular piece of overblown writing ending my CHB experience.

Jonny Jaha said...

This seems odd...

Instead, Fenway fans were happy to get James Taylor. Strumming his six-string, J.T. performed the national anthem solo...

That line would be more appropriate if Jimmy Buffett had sung the national anthem not JT, but maybe I'm just missing something in JT's catalog of music.

But there is the obligatory $103 million jab at Matsuzaka, and claiiming that Jimenez no-hit the Sox through all of three innings is a stretch of drama, at best. I mean, come on, through three innings? Especially since he had a hit batter and a pair of walks up to that point.

Chris said...

Is there such a thing as a ‘bandwagon columnist?’ I’m reminded to ask because Shaughnessy has been fawning all over Randy Moss now that he’s turned into an absolute point-scoring and highlight-reel-making machine. But let’s revisit Shaughnessy’s columns in the week or two following the 2007 NFL draft, shall we? ‘Bandwagon fans.’ How hypocritical.

Objectivebruce said...

I've long known that the posters hereabouts find intolerable anyone that doesn't share their hopelessly infatuated devotion to the corporations that are professional sports in the modern era, but this knee-jerk attack was even more simplistic and intellectually dishonest than I expected when I read the column.

I have felt the same thing about the newbie Sawx fans for quite some time, it's a lot like Bruins 1970s or Celtics 1980s in that it's become the trendy thing to do, which is fine, I guess, except that when you're a veteran of the April school vacation week day games in the frozen mist against the worst teams in baseball, and can remember going to a ballpark before it became the carnival that is now America's Most Beloved Billboard, it gets frustrating to find the nouveau riche getting their hands on World Series tickets through "connections" and turning baseball hats into fashion statements (great line about those who destroy vintage colonials for "McMansions." Describes these people perfectly)

So let me try to understand. Is it a GOOD thing that nitwits are running around saying World Series games OUGHT to be lost or we should not recoil on hearing someone blathering about how it's been "soooo long" since the Sawx last won it?

I absolutely love his description of this segment of Red Sox Nation:
"[A] small legion of new fans who have no idea what rooting for the Red Sox was like"

But then, when I read it, I knew that some self-proclaimed critic would parade his ignorance by using the trite and tiresome device of trotting out a negative comment on something bad that happened one day and a positive comment about something good that happened on another day and try to use them to make some mundane point.

Here, save these on your clipboard, it'll make your postings a lot easier:

"Dan said they were bad the other day and says they are good today. It can't be because they looked bad the other day and look good today, so Dan is evil."

"Dan said in (insert year here) that (player then enjoying career year) was good and then wrote in (insert subsequent year here) that (insert bad statistic or outing here) made (player) bad, so Dan is evil."

"Dan said bad things about (date of last loss) and now says good things about (game/series won), so Dan is evil."

"Dan said (insert reference to a)historical fact known to most educated people, b)team-related event that happened before you jumped on the bandwagon, c)cultural reference not taken from the latest People Weekly) and I don't understand it and am too intellectually lazy to try to understand it, so Dan is evil."

By the way, no, Jimmy Buffet isn't the only person who has strummed a six-string guitar; yes, the reference went over your head; yes comparing someone's writing to freshman comp class and using improper capitalization while doing it is hackneyed and poor writing; and yes, it's quite acceptable to note that Randy Moss's deportment has been, like his performance, exemplary this year while pointing out that such has not always been the case.

paul said...


You and Shank are right. Being a fan of a team that loses all the time is a lot better than one that has consistent success. You'd figure since his parent company owns a significant part of the team that you'd both be ecstatic that they are making money for Daddy Globe and Mommy Times.

A sports team should never try to attract new fans. They should let the hard-core suffer for years so when they win, they can enjoy it more. Wow, no wonder why sports teams are breaking down your and Shank's door to get them to run their ops and marketing departments.

Bruce, you said yourself that sports teams are corporations. Isn't the goal of a corporation to make money? The best way to do that is to attract fringe fans. The best way to attract fringe fans is to win.

I'm hoping the Sox lose the Series just so we can kick all those "newbie" fans to the curb so we can go back to being bitter yet somehow more honorable baseball fans.

Dave M said...


You always bring great banter to the boards so thank you.

I also find that you are as intellectually shallow as Shaughnessy himself.

The fact that Shaughnessy says one thing on one day and a different thing on another day is not the central point in concluding that "Dan is evil".

In fact that is not my conclusion at at....I dont think Dan is evil, I think he is incredibly feeble. He draws one conclusion on a set of facts on one day and then draws a different conclusion on essentially the same set of facts on another day. His pathetic meandering is a function of which way he wants to spin his story line - and he will be damned if the facts get in the way of a "good" story line. Ultimately, his house of cards is built upon his lack of ability to do fundamentally sound analysis. If he dug deeper and fortified his writings with more analysis, I dont think he would blow with the wind the way he does.

I think it is the ultimate irony that Shaughnessy derides the bandwagon fans. Can't you see the irony in this? Here is a guy who just a week ago was piecing together the blame game for a team down 3-1 and now he is praising these Sox for being different than any other team in the past 100 years.

How can a reasonable person take such diametrically opposed positions in the span of a week? I dont think a reasonable person would but Dan would because he is shallow and generally inept.

dbvader said...


(great line about those who destroy vintage colonials for "McMansions." Describes these people perfectly)

He wasn't describing "these people" he was describing John Henry, who Shank used to suck up to.

What did the reference go over your head?

And OB, I am still waiting for the correction regarding this post:

Maybe you should take one of those reading comprehension classes you are always hawking.

Your post's second paragraph:
"The link to the piece on Howard Mudd? Where does it mention videotaping signals? I've looked four times now and can't quite seem to find it."

Look a fifth time.

The article's second paragraph:
"And Johnson reiterated his previous statement that he believes what the Patriots did -- violating NFL rules by videotaping the opposing coaches' signals -- is commonplace. Johnson also said he did it himself."

I am sure profuse apologies will follow.

dbvader said...

"I think it is the ultimate irony that Shaughnessy derides the bandwagon fans. Can't you see the irony in this? Here is a guy who just a week ago was piecing together the blame game for a team down 3-1 and now he is praising these Sox for being different than any other team in the past 100 years.

I was going to post the same thing before reading that.

How about the irony in Shank going from hawking the curse bs and hoping the Red Sox lose to lecturing "newbies" about being grateful.