Saturday, August 26, 2006

How touching

After some peaceful weeks earlier in the summer, it sure seems like we're getting an awful lot of Dan lately. This column about David Ortiz's recent hospitalization for an arrhythmia is more news than anything else, so all in all, it's not too bad. However, there is one paragraph I object to:
Incredibly, Ortiz's visit to Mass. General went unreported for almost an entire week. He is one of the most famous (and largest) citizens of New England, and yet no one dropped a dime on his hospitalization until it was reported on an obscure website ( while the Red Sox were in California. Ortiz confirmed the report in a conversation with the Herald's Tony Massarotti Thursday and last night agreed to discuss the matter for the first time.
1)Yup, the media dropped the ball here. Dan is part of the media. Therefore, Dan dropped the ball.

2)"Largest citizens of New England?" Are we seriously picking on his size? That's really inane and unnecessary. Yes, every time he slides into third base, I expect to see a headline the next day reporting that the ceiling of the Fenway basement collapsed and injured some baseball ops staffers. But it's all in good fun. With Dan, you can be sure that no jab is in good fun.

3)Now that he's linked this blog on the Globe, it is no longer going to be an obscure website. Free advertising!

4)"Last night agreed to discuss the matter for the first time." Added: "With me! Dan Shaughnessy! Massarotti may have put out a blurb, but I got the scoop! Me! Dan Shaughnessy! Sure, I had to lock David's daughter in an E-Z Storage unit and threaten to put out Photoshopped images of him going down on Stacey Lucchino (I have a lot of pictures of Stacey Lucchino!) but I got the scoop first! Look, here it is!"

As far as I can tell, this arrhythmia thing is just a complete non-story specifically designed to scare Red Sox fans, who are already frazzled enough, thanks very much. Let it die.


fadedredsoxhat said...

How funny is it that CHB has to credit a blog and Massarotti?

I don't think he got those quotes from Papi exclusively. I think he was talking to the herd from his locker.

FWIW, I've been thinking that Massarotti is Italian for Shaughnessy ever since the pink hats column.

David Ortiz: 6-4, 230, and one of the largest citizens of New England.

Beth said...

it pains me to have to point this out, since i still think shaughnessy does a sacrilege by discussing this ortiz story, but what i think he's trying to say is, it's amazing that the ortiz story went unreported for so long given that he's kind of a hard person to miss and tough to hide given his size. i mean, has anyone here actually had an ortiz sighting in person out anywhere? the guy totally jumps out at you--he's larger than life. i really think that's what the "larger" statement meant.

also, it's weird that you would say that the story is "just trying to scare red sox fans who are already frazzled" given how obviously hard the team tried to hide it. there's plenty the media doesn't report--personal things about players like who's sleeping around. this could also have been one of those things till someone else broke it and the rest of the media machine felt the need to pick it up.

Anonymous said...

//given how obviously hard the team tried to hide it//

I don't think the team tried to hide this at all. Ortiz went to the hospital late in the evening and though some people certainly saw him, obviously none of them were the types to "alert the media" about it. And certainly no reputable nurse or doctor is going to do so.

The team wasn't going to call a press conference or make an announcement about this, as it had no relevance to Ortiz's play (i.e. he didn't miss a game or go on the DL). When the news came out, the team did not deny it or try to hide it. Francona refrained from commenting per Ortiz's wishes, which is standard procedure.

What annoys me about CHB's column is that even when the guy makes some kind of odd attempt to be nice, it still comes out nasty. Strange.

Objectivebruce said...

When the club's most valuable player is hospitalized in the middle of the most important series of the year ("one of the most important series in the history of the world's most successful sports franchises" was John Sterling's hyperbolic take), the club should reveal this fact to the public.

It's anything but a non-story. Say what you will about Shaughnessy, and at whatever level of lack of maturity in which you say it, but on things like getting Ortiz to talk about this or getting Jim Ed Rice to go more in depth about the Hall of Fame snubs than any other broadcaster or writer has managed to do, Shaughnessy shows why he is an important columnist with a pretty good grasp of what's important and relevant, the knee-jerk childish braying that characterizes most of the postings hereabouts notwithstanding.

The Stacey Lucchino graf is the most dreadful, distasteful and downright immature thing I've read on this site.

And it has a lot of competition.

Objectivebruce said...

Yes, I know it was a gang-bang, and meant to refer to putting perspective on Ortiz talking about this, not to imply it was from a one-on-one.

Objectivebruce regrets the error.

jenny said...

The team didn't make a big deal of it, either because they were trying to hide it or because they just didn't see it as a big deal. Until the media picked up on it and blew it up, nobody was the wiser. That's what I meant by the last sentence. The entire Boston media is alarmist, why shouldn't the trend continue?

And Bruce, you're a prude. Live a little. It has never made sense to me why you insist on coming here when you obviously hate the site. Is there something wrong with your computer?

fadedredsoxhat said...

The player should decide whether the details of a sudden trip to the hospital gets to be released to the public, not the club.

Jenny, replace Stacey Lucchino with Kelly Barons.

Anonymous said...

//Shaughnessy shows why he is an important columnist with a pretty good grasp of what's important and relevant//


Oh, that's just too much.



The Chief said...

Where was The CHB when Teddy Bruschi was sitting inside the MGH neurology clinic?

I thought so...

jenny said...

Hey, Chief, I've got a piece on tomorrow's Manny column all ready to go, but it won't publish. It tells me there are errors, something about no space in the archives. Any idea how to fix it? Do we need to delete some stuff? It's saved the draft, but I don't know what's up.