A Righteous Rick Pitino Column

Rick Pitino, coaching in his 2,000th college basketball game (or so it seems) gets back into the NCAA tournament yet again. Shank, in one of his better columns in quite some time, pays the proper tribute to the guy who destroyed the Celtics in the 1990's:

Rick Pitino, basketball survivor, is back in the NCAA Tournament

Rick Pitino: basketball savant, basketball survivor.

His name is mud in man caves and and saloons across New England. He is a bad memory of a dark time in Boston Celtics history. I mentioned him alongside M.L. Carr in a column carving up the 2021 Celtics a couple of weeks ago, and Carr objected, saying, “Do not put my name in the same paragraph with Rick Pitino.”

Pitino became a punch line in the college basketball world a few years ago after his latest scandal (this one involving an FBI investigation) got him bounced from a lucrative lifetime gig at Louisville. In addition, his 2013 NCAA championship at Louisville was vacated.

Still, Pitino could not quit, and his Basketball Jones took him to Athens. Like Michael Corleone in fictional exile in Sicily, real-life Pitino coached Panathinaikos for a season while things cooled down back in the States.

Now Pitino is back in the Big Dance with Iona, a school with a 1-14 lifetime NCAA Tournament record (the win was against Holy Cross when Jim Valvano and Jeff Ruland were Iona’s coach and star). Iona was the only NCAA school that would take a chance on Pitino. He is Norman Dale in “Hoosiers,” getting a shot at Hickory after nefarious activity banished him from every other coaching opportunity.

One of the few things I'm with Shank on - some respect for him (begrudging, of course) but definitely a dislike of this guy.

Ridin' The Shetland Pony

Sunday's Shank Globe column sees Danny Boy riding his high horse to denounce the dishonesty of college coaching, with Lane Kiffin making the jump to USC after one whole year at Tennessee. Shank doesn't like people who have a tangential interest in the process:

"Yahoo towns with nothing else to offer make college football/basketball a local religion with poisonous Booster Clubs...",

"He romances the athletic department, the student population, and the local yahoos (i.e. people who’d buy a book written by Calipari).",

"Losers who catalogue such things (folks who dedicate their lives to ranking 16-year-old offensive linemen) claim Kiffin’s 2010 recruiting class was top-10 material."

Shank also can't stand current Kentucky coach John Calipari, which may have started when Calipari left UMASS - Amherst in the mid 1990's.

Shank has a few kind words for Rick Pitino:

Remember all the lies we got from Pitino when he ran the Celtics? Little Ricky could always make it go away by saying, “That was how I felt at the time.’’

I'd have to see what lies Shank's referring to, but the problem with Pitino was something else. I went to one Pitino-coached Celtics game, and Pitino was yelling at Antoine Walker and Paul Pierce every damn time up & down the court. You can yell like that at college kids, not professional athletes that make double & triple your salary, even accounting for Pitino's hot-shot salary at the time. I was hoping the basketball would somehow wind up in my hands from a bad pass or something, just so I'd have something to throw at Pitino to shut him up.

Rick Pitino Watch

Since Shank likes ripping former Boston area professional athletes, I'm left wondering why he's not ripping former Boston Celtic coaches who are now on the skids?

Rick Pitino could be in some serious trouble.

After the FBI announced its investigation into an NCAA corruption scheme earlier this week, the Louisville head coach was identified as "Coach 2" in federal court documents that claim he played a role in sending illegal payments to the family of a highly-touted recruit, CBS News' Dana Jacobson reports.

Prosecutors allege Adidas executives funneled $100,000 to the family of a top recruit - believed to be five-star freshman Brian Bowen - to ensure he'd play basketball at Louisville, an Adidas-sponsored school. Louisville reportedly suspended Bowen this week.

Pitino was placed on unpaid administrative leave Wednesday along with athletic director Tom Jurich, but has denied any wrongdoing.

The Hall of Fame coach was already due to serve a five-game suspension this season stemming from his role in the program's escort scandal.

Among a few posts, here's some of Shank's previous work on Pitino.

Happy Anniversary!

(An occasional departure from covering His Shankness)

I stumbled across this tweet (and excellent YouTube video in the ensuing thread) from a Twitter feed called Freezing Cold Takes, and this one's a doozy that will bring back many painful memories. On May 6, 1997, the Boston Celtics made perhaps the worst hire in professional basketball history when they hired this fucking guy:

Thanks to @OldTakesExposed, we were reminded of a brutal date in #Celtics historyhttps://t.co/kxCKgAQMzz pic.twitter.com/SJKXqHB5hZ

— NBC Sports Boston (@NBCSBoston) May 19, 2019

Rick Pitino set this team back nearly a decade and it was just plain ugly. My primary memory of the burning dumpster fire that was the Rick Pitino Celtics was actually going to one of the games and, as the YouTube video points out a few times, the only thing I noticed was Pitino yelling and screaming at Antoine Walker and Paul Pierce on nearly every play. I'm sitting about ten rows back behind one of the backboards and I told the buddy I was with - 'if for some reason the ball bounces out and lands in my hands, I'm throwing it right at him and I don't care if I get arrested and thrown out of here for life.' I am beyond certain I'm not the only one who felt that way about Pitino by this time; he was shitcanned about a month afterwards. Him getting caught banging a waitress some time later and all the other shit that happened to him at Louisville only adds to my feeling of schadenfreude, and probably yours as well.

DHL Dan - XXIX

Yes, that number does seem pretty low, doesn't it?

In any event, I started wondering if Shank and the Patriots being off this week was a coincidence. How did I misjudge Shank's dedication to his craft?

Picked-up pieces while wondering whether this is the year Cincinnati Bengals coach Marvin Lewis (0-6) finally wins a playoff game.

That would be no...

■ Lots of boo-hoo “why did they pick on Tom Brady and let Peyton Manning off the hook?” programming on the numerous 24-7 Patriot propaganda radio shows this week.

When a reporter (among many others) shows one standard for a quarterback accused of deflating footballs (hang 'em high!) and then readily admits bias in dismissing the more serious charges of HGH use by another quarterback, it's not 'boo-hooing'. It's calling into question a serious charge of media bias, a concept Shank should be quite familiar with.

■ I’m taking the Bengals, Chiefs, Seahawks, and Packers this weekend. But I’m the same guy who thought the Patriots would actually try, and therefore demolish, the Dolphins last weekend.

So take the Steelers, Texans, Vikings and the Redskins, everybody!

Larry Bird sighting? You betcha!

■ LeBron James just turned 31 (Dec. 30, same birthday as Sandy Koufax and Tiger Woods) and has already played more career minutes than Larry Bird or Magic Johnson.

■ Nomar Garciaparra got eight Hall of Fame votes out of 440. He’s officially off the ballot. Think of what could have been. This man hit .372 and .357 as a righthanded batter in the American League. One year, he knocked in 98 runs batting leadoff. He was on his way to Cooperstown.

"Hey, Nomar - remember when we were best buddies? Good times, man!

■ When Kevin Garnett came through town with the T-Wolves last month, there was a lot of buzz about KG getting his Celtics number (5) retired. Danny Ainge is among those who thinks this is a good idea.

We all know Garnett is the one who changed everything in 2007-08 when the Celtics won their 17th championship. Still, I’m a tad reluctant on this one. Garnett played only six seasons here.

The best case for KG is Dennis Johnson, who played only seven seasons in Boston but got his number retired with no debate. DJ won two championships with the Green but certainly never had the impact Garnett did.

KG was instrumental in the Celtics winning that championship - retire his number.

This blogger is with Shank on this one - shitting on Rick Pitino!

■ Ranting about coverage of sex parties at his basketball players’ dormitory, Louisville coach Rick Pitino acknowledged, “Did one person do some scurrilous things? I believe so . . . For the life of me, I can’t figure it out. He knew better and was taught better by his parents and me.’’ Pitino is on slippery ground on this one. He’s the same guy who admitted to police that he had sex with a woman (who later tried to extort him) in a Louisville restaurant in 2003.

In case you were wondering, Shank still hates numbers:

■ Just when you think the Cleveland Browns can’t be any dumber, they hire a baseball analytics guy to rescue the franchise. Paul DePodesta is the Harvard guy portrayed by Jonah Hill in “Moneyball.’’ Clevelanders are hoping his skill set translates to football. What are the football equivalents of WAR, OPS, UZR, and high-leverage innings?

One of the few times Shank gets to hype his alma mater:

■ Former Holy Cross basketball star Bob Kissane, who played in Europe many years ago, suggests the NBA consider a rule that would allow the fouled team to take the ball and restart the shot clock instead of automatically going to the free throw line.

Lame bands from fifty years ago? We got you covered!

■ Rock and Roll Hall of Famer Brian Wilson (his cousin Mike Love is Kevin Love’s uncle) had his own version of Alex Guerrero back in the day. The fellow’s name was Dr. Gene Landy. Look him up sometime.

And what column is truly complete without a little more Boston Globe bashing?

■ The one and only good thing to come out of the Globe’s home-delivery nightmare is the reinforcement that a lot of you folks still care about your printed hometown newspaper and still consider it part of your daily routine. Thank you. We will do better.

Dwindling circulation numbers and ad revenue coupled with increased prices and reduced content - it's a bargain!

It's A Twofer

Shank bangs out a pair of columns, one of them at CNN / SI, where he wonders why Rick Pitino still has a job. Among other tidbits,

Leaving himself open to ridicule on top of scorn, he said the encounter lasted only 15 seconds. He made himself a punchline.

What's worse then being a Minuteman? A Pitino!

Next up, Shank takes yet another shot at Jacoby Ellsbury. After three plus months, you do have to wonder what the hell is going on.

It’s impossible and unfair to measure another man’s pain.

But Shank does it anyway. It helps to write this column after a Red Sox loss, and now Ellsbury is the new Nomar / Manny / Schilling in Shank's eyes, complete with mentioning a trade / a comparison to Nomar circa 2004.

Meanwhile, the wounded Sox are sinking in the American League East.

This, after a mere week after jumping back on the bandwagon. This guy's shameless.

DHL Dan CLXIV - Haunted

Thre's always one player or manager on the Red Sox that's in Shank's doghouse - Roger Clemens, Pedro Martinez, Nomar Garciaparra, Adrian Gonzalez, Carl Crawford, Grady Little, Manny Ramirez, Theo Epstein, Josh Beckett and John Lackey (the 'chicken & beer' guys), Bobby Valentine, Jacoby Ellsbury, David Ortiz and a host of others. This year's scapegoat is hard-luck pitcher Chris Sale, who has yet to pitch for the Sox this year. Why let a mere detail like that get in the way of a good rip job?

The Chris Sale contract continues to haunt the Red Sox, and other thoughts

Picked-up pieces while waiting for Reese McGuire to make a throw when an Oriole is stealing a base …

▪ At this moment, Chris Sale’s contract extension — inked in the sugar-high spring of 2019 when the Red Sox could have waited to measure his health — is the worst signing in Boston sports history.

It’s worse than deals given to Rusney Castillo or Pablo Sandoval. Worse than Carl Crawford or Matt Young. Way worse than David Price or Daisuke Matsuzaka. Worse than Vin Baker, Pervis Ellison, Antoine Walker, or even Rick Pitino. Worse than Kevin Stevens, Marty Lapointe, or Adalius Thomas.

Them's fighting words - there was never a worse signing than Rick Pitino, whose awful reign was the equivalent of burning the Celtics to its foundations, then salting the earth where the dying embers lay. I'm also deducting a style point for Shank not mentioning Curt Schilling's last contract.

Sale delivered in his first two seasons in Boston and got the final out of the 2018 World Series. This isn’t about that. This is about the non-yield since the Sox went out of their way to lock him up in that fateful spring.

This is also the eight time Shank's mentioned / complained about Sale's contract 'since that fateful spring', a pinata of Shank's which always delivers a few treats whenever he whacks it.

Low Hanging Fruit

The more wins John Calipari racks up with the Kentucky Wildcats, the more chances Shank gets to take a dump on the guy, this being the second one of the year:

Here we are. Kentucky, the No. 1-ranked team in the country — coached by John Calipari — is on the cusp of NCAA history, 31-0 after Saturday’s win over Florida. Meanwhile, the folks at UMass have decided to retire Coach Cal’s “number,” and this weekend marks the 20th anniversary of him refusing to allow a Globe reporter to visit his home for Selection Sunday (nope, no animosity here! - ed).

Sometimes there is not enough space in our newspaper to articulate all the thoughts, and state all the points, that need to be made.

Let’s start with this: John Calipari is a magnetic figure, undoubtedly the greatest college basketball recruiter of the 21st century. He works the NCAA’s cesspool system better than any man alive. He is charismatic. He came to Amherst more than a quarter of a century ago as a Rick Pitino wannabe, but now he has vaulted over Pitino, and created the Brand of Cal. He is probably going to win a second national championship with Kentucky this year and is no doubt a swell dancer and would make for a fine dinner companion.

But as a Massachusetts taxpayer, I have a problem with UMass “retiring” Coach Cal’s number.

The only time Shank pretends to give a rat's ass about sports at UMass is when he can use it to take shots at John Calipari. That said, there's little to debate with respect to Calipari's tenure at both UMass and Memphis, where he and / or the team were hit with NCAA sanctions both times. He's not exactly Coach K in the ethics department.

What's interesting here is the italicized part above. When the New England Patriots played in their second Super Bowl in 1997, the Patriots threw a party and Shank was not invited. We believe this to be the point where Shank became a lifelong bête noire of the Patriots. If he disliked the Patriots at that point (or, more specifically, owner Robert Kraft), this snub was the proverbial nail in the coffin.

In much the same manner, if Shank disliked Calipari in 1995, this snub of a fellow Boston Globe reporter pretty much sealed the deal from that point until now.

Confidence, Explained

It seems like Shank has a pit bull like grip on this Red Sox sign stealing saga:

How can the Red Sox be so confident MLB’s investigation will end well for them?

Every day there seems to be another Red Sox person or media report expressing confidence that Major League Baseball’s investigation into alleged cheating by the 2018 Sox will not result in significant punishment.

And I’m wondering . . . how can they know this when it’s an ongoing investigation?

Because, of course, expressing confidence in a particular and favorable outcome is different from actual knowledge of a particular outcome. It's fairly similar to a defense team expressing confidence that the jury will find favorably for the defendant. Shank doesn't see that distinction, or he does and just makes an assumption about the Red Sox having said knowledge, maliciously or otherwise.

He then cites comments from Sox management, a quote from Dan Roche (helpfully identified as a former member of the Red Sox broadcast team) and another one from former player Lou Merloni (likewise identified) who all express confidence of a favorable outcome, further heightening Shank's suspicions.

There are other decent parts of the column, which you should consider checking out if you have any interest in this story. And when a cheatin' scandal is the subject, who else to bring up than your old college basketball coaching punching bag, Rick Pitino * John Calipari:

One could have similar suspicions about how John Calipari was treated by the NCAA. Coach Cal got rung up by the NCAA when he was at UMass and again at Memphis (two Final Four appearances vacated). But not at Kentucky. It’s easy to spank UMass and Memphis. But Kentucky is a blue-chip program. A proud part of the NCAA brand. Like the Red Sox in major league baseball. The Astros at this point are not a blue-chip program.

So it seems to be the developing 'conventional wisdom' that Alex Cora's the only guy to suffer serious punishment, and Red Sox brass will get the proverbial slap on the wrist and a couple of weeks of bad press.

And now, for the closing crescendo...

Because I already know none of them will ever return my phone calls, I e-mailed Red Sox ownership Friday afternoon at 1:25 to ask about the organization’s confidence that this investigation will end well for them: “There seems to be a lot of confidence from you guys, J.D. Martinez, Chaim (he told reporters he is comfortable considering 2018 staffers for managerial opening) that the club feels it will be exonerated by MLB investigation into 2018 Sox. Media reports from Rochie and Merloni echo this. 1. Is it accurate to state you are confident there will be no punishments? 2. Have you been told anything by MLB?”

Yeah, I put that first part in there but I had to make an assumption about Shank's relationship with Red Sox ownership and management, much like he did. Isn't writing great?

(* - 1 point deduction for not ragging on Pitino as well)

UPDATE / EDIT AT 11:48 AM - Small spelling error fixed in the Coach Cal section.

The Sybil Award (More Dan-isms)

Quick: What’s the significance of May 1, 2003 in Boston sports history? Would it help if I narrowed it down to the Celtics?

“If you are the Celtics, you have to hope you win tonight, or even Saturday. Win either game and the horrors of Game 5 at Conseco Fieldhouse become nothing more than a footnote. But . . . If the Celtics lose two more times, then Tuesday's nightmare in Indianapolis goes down in infamy. It will simply never be forgotten. It will take its place in the New England Sports Museum Hall of Shame alongside Bill Buckner's error and Too Many Men on the Ice.” (Boston Globe, May 1, 2003. For the record, the sixth-seeded Celtics beat the third-seeded Pacers. Big deal, wasn’t it?)


Based on the 1500 or so hits received after our first column on Dan-isms, perhaps we should throw out a few more:

“So, what exactly were the Houston Astros thinking when they shipped Carl Everett to Boston in exchange for minor league prospects Adam Everett and Greg Miller? Everett had three more hits and four RBIs in yesterday's 14-2 rout of the Oakland A's. In 10 games with the Red Sox, he's hitting .444 with a team-high four homers and 13 RBIs.” (on Carl Everett, Boston Globe, April 16, 2000)

“Could this have worked out any better for Carl Everett and the Red Sox?
Doubtful.” (Boston Globe, May 27, 2000)

“Carl Everett was the Ebola virus of the Boston clubhouse. The Sox should have dealt him for a sack of doorknobs if that's what was offered." (Boston Globe, Dec. 13, 2001)

Based on what we have seen in April of 2002, the best move by the loathed and deposed general manager was the December 2001 trade in which he dumped nutcase Carl Everett …” (Boston Globe, May 1, 2002)


“The best man for the job is getting the job. ... Such a concept.” and “It makes so much sense. How can it be true?" (on the hiring of Dan Duquette, Boston Globe, Jan. 27, 1994)

“The Red Sox in this holiday season have become Fools 'R' Us.” (on Dan Duquette’s offseason moves, Boston Globe, Nov. 27, 1998. The Red Sox made the playoffs in 1999)

“Dan Duquette has gone from doofus to genius in less than 24 hours.” (on signing Manny Ramirez, Boston Globe, Dec 13, 2000)

“But spare us the tears, Dan. Where was all that emotion when you heartlessly bulldozed dozens of people in the organization and ran the team in a completely bloodless, corporate fashion?” (on the firing of Dan Duquette, Boston Globe, March 1, 2002)


“Fourteen starts. Three wins. Roger Clemens is never going to be confused with Mr. October. Clemens is Wilt Chamberlain and the postseason is one gigantic free throw. Last night, he was given the ball with a chance to close out the Oakland A's in the fourth game of the American League Division Series. (on Roger Clemens, Boston Globe, Oct. 8, 2000)

“The hair on his head is starting to thin, but Roger Clemens still throws 96 miles per hour, hits all the corners, and wins more than any pitcher in the American League.” (Aug. 31, 2001)

“How could anybody miss that butt?” (on Shawn Estes’ attempted beaning of Roger Clemens, Boston Globe, June 16, 2002)

“Roger Clemens is 40 years old and will be a free agent at the end of this season. … The new Red Sox management should explore the possibility of mending fences and signing the Rocket to a one-year contract. Sox fans may hate the guy, but a Pedro Martinez-Derek Lowe-Roger Clemens top three would look pretty good next spring.” (Boston Globe, Sept. 4, 2002)


“But now it’s time to come back to his basketball roots. It's time to return to the land of Jack Leaman, Dr. J, Al Skinner, Dave Gavitt, Ronnie Perry, Joe Mullaney. It's time to come home to the New Garden where Red and K.C., and the Cooz and Tommy Heinsohn still prowl. It's time to come back to New England to rescue the once-proud Boston Celtics.” (on the hiring of Rick Pitino, Boston Globe, July 7, 1997)

“Thanksdad Gaston has to be wondering if he made a wise move when he turned over complete control and $50 million to a man who we know is a terrific college coach, a snappy dresser, and a top-shelf motivational speaker.” (on Rick Pitino, Boston Globe, May 25, 1999)


“The Cowboy Uppers of last year did not bring a World Series to Boston, but few would argue that it was among the most thrilling of all Boston baseball summers, taking a place alongside pennant-winning years of 1967, 1975, and 1986. All three of those embraceable teams flopped badly the next year and the 2004 Sox are threatening to do the same thing.” (on the Red Sox, Boston Globe, July 1, 2004)

“The Red Sox really are put on this earth to torture and test the faith of their fans. Just when you thought it couldn't get any more hideous, the Sox did it again last night. The Red Sox really are put on this earth to torture and test the faith of their fans. Just when you thought it couldn't get any more hideous, the Sox did it again last night.” (on the Red Sox, Boston Globe, July 2, 2004. Four months later, the Red Sox were World Series champions)


“But hubristic Bill erred when he dealt Bledsoe to a division rival. It was the football equivalent of telling Roger Clemens he was in the ''twilight'' of his career. And let's not forget a transaction 82 years ago when the Red Sox sold their best player to a division rival from New York. That one hasn't worked out too well, either.” (on Bill Belichick, Boston Globe, Nov. 3, 2002. Since the trade, the Patriots have a regular season won-loss record of 46-16 and two more Super Bowl wins; Bledsoe has a regular season won-loss record of 31-31)

“The University of Belichick takes its rightful place alongside Harvard and MIT. And the New England Patriots of the 21st century are established as an NFL dynasty on par with the Packers of the 1960s, the Steelers of the '70s, the 49ers of the '80s, and the Cowboys of the '90s.” (following the Patriots’ third Super Bowl Win, Boston Globe, Feb. 7, 2005)


“A fourth straight one-and-out would expose the myth of Billy Beane’s ‘ Moneyball’ A’s.” (during the AL playoffs, Boston Globe, Oct. 6, 2003)

“Having the top payroll doesn’t guarantee that you're going to win the World Series, and we worry about the small markets, but we’ve seen Oakland compete in the last couple of years with teams that finish in the first place. … You need good management in addition to money; having the money is not enough.” (on WGBH Forum, March 30, 2004)

Dream On?

Using a theme lifted straight from Wednesday's Felger & Mazz radio show, Shank's got a thing for LeBron James, impending free agent, becoming a member of the Boston Celtics.

The nationally televised “Decision” show will be a classic. Can’t you just see it now? LeBron James and Jim Gray sitting on stools, holding microphones, making small talk. Finally, after 40 minutes of verbal foreplay, head-bobbin’ sock puppet Gray says, “Well, LeBron, what’s it going to be?’’

And the great one exhales deeply and says, “I have decided I am going to take my talents to Revere Beach.’’

Revere Beach? Really? Come on, Shank!

Just like that, the Greatest Player of All-Time announces that he will finish his career with the Boston Celtics.

It means so much. It means that LeBron will grab Frank Ramsey’s No. 23 from the rafters, Pitino-style. He’ll also reserve the rights to No. 6 (LeBron wore 6 when he won in Miami) and No. 32 (which Bron wore at St. Vincent-St. Mary High School). If Bill Russell and Kevin McHale don’t like it, too bad. The Celtics will become LeBron’s team now.

Then again, stranger things have happened.

UPDATE AT 2:40 PM - One last dig at Shank:

The silly topic is sports talk radio gold.

Yeah, like we couldn't figure out that one!

Faking It, By Dan Shaughnessy

Last week, Shank unconvincingly pretended to care for the New England Patriots. This week, he pretends to care about college basketball (with a local angle, naturally).

SPOKANE, Wash. — This is a big bowl of awkward.

Tommy Amaker is set to coach No. 12 seed Harvard against No. 5 seed Cincinnati in the first round of the NCAA Tournament Thursday, and when the Crimson lose their next game, Amaker is gone. He’s Jacoby Ellsbury gone. Harvard’s loss will be Boston College’s gain.

This is not official, mind you. Maybe Amaker can push the Crimson all the way to the Sweet Sixteen this year. Folks at Mr. Bartley’s are hoping Amaker will still be at Harvard next year, and the year after, and the year after that. Maybe he’ll be there long enough to get his own statue in the Yard, alongside John Harvard.

But I’m betting he’s gone as soon as the Crimson lose their next game. The Boston College job opened up Tuesday when BC fired Steve Donahue, and Amaker is the odds-on favorite to be taking his talents to Chestnut Hill.

If Shank feels like stepping up his weekly column output past the single column mark, and he writes a few more columns about college basketball and the NCAA tournament, look for him to turn his firehose towards Kentucky coach John Calipari (who Shank despises) and Louisville coach Rick 'Minuteman' Pitino, who destroyed the Celtics in the 1990's.

DHL Dan CCLXVI - Shots Fired

In this weeks picked Up Pieces column, Shank looks at the bad blood between Patriots owner Robert Kraft and Bill Belichick:

The Robert Kraft-Bill Belichick divorce is as messy as any in our local sports scene, and other thoughts

Picked-up pieces while waiting for Bill Belichick’s NCAA debut on Labor Day evening . . .

⋅ The NFL doesn’t start until the Cowboys play the Eagles on Thursday in Philly. Meanwhile, there’s a holiday weekend college football smorgasbord, capped with ESPN’s Monday night showcase: TCU at North Carolina — Belichick’s first game on the sideline since a 17-3 loss to the Jets at Gillette Stadium on Jan. 7, 2024.

It often ends badly with star coaches and athletes around here. Remember Roger Clemens vs. Dan Duquette? Rick Pitino vs. The Fellowship of the Miserable? Terry Francona vs. Chicken and Beer? Rafael Devers vs. Red Sox leadership?

Belichick vs. Bob Kraft ranks high on our list of local sports’ harsh divorces.

A few days after Belichick’s final Foxborough moment, we got the phony photo-op with the owner putting his arm around Bill and claiming their breakup was “mutual.” Belichick played along, calling his firing “a day of gratitude and celebration.”

That was the end of the Kraft-Belichick decorum. Since then it’s been a series of heat-seeking salvos launched across multiple platforms — a full-fury-fusillade worthy of Gavin Newsom vs. Donald Trump, Drake vs. Kendrick Lamar, and/or Schilling vs. Shaughnessy.

Um, About That Peyton Manning Column...

In a refreshing twist, Shank comes as close to an apology that we've seen in ages:

Whoops.

OK, maybe I jumped the gun a little. I got caught up in the moment. On the eve of the Super Bowl, I wrote that Peyton Manning was better than Tom Brady. I was positively Peytonized. And as Rick Pitino once said, “that’s how I felt at the time.’’

Fortunately, this is sports and opinions change every day. Now that Manning lost the Super Bowl with his Favre-like pick six, he’s a mere .500 quarterback (9-9) in postseason play. He’s still two rings shy of Brady, who is 14-4 in NFL tournament play.

Reader feedback was constructive:

■“Dan - You are like a TV weatherman in New England. How much of the time are you really seriously right? Would you like some seasoning with your order of crow? Better luck next time.’’

■“I understand you got an assignment to write some usual BS for the Super Bowl. That’s how you get paid. But, you have to get into people’s nerves and create some controversy in order for some people to read your stuff; know that I am being polite with the word ‘stuff.’ ’’

You have to give Shank some credit here, right?

Staying Alive

The Red Sox won big this afternoon, 10-3 with David Price making an excellent contribution out of the bullpen. To hear Shank describe that contribution, you'd think he had just cured cancer.

He was Sidney Wicks, Jack Clark, Rick Pitino, Adalius Thomas, Carl Crawford, and Adrian Gonzalez. He was a top talent who made his professional bones and bags of cash in some other town, then came to Boston and offended an entire base of loyal fans.

Some of the treatment David Price received was unfair. Some of it was not.

But in the end, the lessons of professional sports are universal. Boston fans are no different from fans in any other sports-crazed town: If you perform, they will love you. If you don’t perform, be prepared to hear slander, libel, and words you never heard in the Bible.

Shank's one of the perpetrators; has been for well over three decades. There's little doubt in my mind John Henry told Shank to tone it down with criticism of Price.

Price performed in Sunday’s elimination Game 3 of the ALDS, coming out of the bullpen to stop the bleeding when it looked as if the Red Sox would suffer an ignominious sweep for the second straight October. Price’s four innings of shutout relief kept the Astros on the launch pad while the Sox ran to a 10-3 season-saving victory over Houston.

“The story of this one is David Price,’’ said Sox manager John Farrell, who might have been saved from the gallows with this win.

We'll see tomorrow, won't we?

Working Overtime

The Boston Bruins won the second game of the Stanley Cup final in Chicago, 2 - 1. Since the Bruins did not lose, Shank can't bring up the Finals loss to Edmonton in 1990 or the playoff loss to the Flyers three years ago, so instead we get a column about Tyler Seguin:

CHICAGO — Tyler Seguin is 21 years old. He can skate all night and stay up late and bounce back the next day. He might be the poster boy for this closing time, 2013 Stanley Cup Final.

Don’t make any plans for Tuesday or Thursday mornings this week. The Bruins and Blackhawks are coming to Boston and can’t settle things in three regulation periods of hockey.

Powered by Seguin’s best game of the playoffs, the B’s beat the Hawks, 2-1, in overtime late Saturday on a wrist shot from the left circle by Daniel Paille after a pinpoint cross-ice feed from Seguin.

Taking care of business and working overtime. That is the theme song of this Cup Final. And the later it goes, the better Seguin gets. He is Boston’s midnight rambler.

Nothing says hip & modern like quoting lyrics that are four decades old!

When you're doing a column on Tyler Seguin and the Bruins, you just have to mention other local sports teams:

Sometimes we give up too early on a player. Remember Chauncey Billups? Celtics coach Rick Pitino grabbed him with the third pick in the entire draft (small consolation for not getting Tim Duncan), then traded Billups three-quarters of the way through his first season.

Sometimes we wait too long on a player. Remember Laurence Maroney? The Patriots used their first-round pick on the running back from Minnesota and waited four years before dumping him. Bill Belchick’s patience with Maroney reminded me of Earl Weaver’s explanation for sticking with aging ace Mike Cuellar. Weaver said, “I gave Cuellar more chances than my first wife.’’

And then there's this:

He has not been “The Next One.’’ We don’t know exactly what he is. We’re not even certain if he’s a center or a winger.

Might want to confirm that he's a center with one of your colleagues, Shank...

DHL Dan CXXXVIII - Kyrie's Homecoming

Former Boston Celtic Kyrie Irving got a warm and loving reception on Friday night:

Boston fans didn’t cross the line with Kyrie Irving Friday night, and let’s keep it that way

Picked-up pieces while loving our return to sports played in front of full houses:

▪ Boston fans stood tall at the Garden Friday night. They booed Kyrie Irving every time he touched the basketball. They delivered harsh chants in Kyrie’s direction. But nothing went over the line. After the big Celtics win and Irving’s subpar game, even the complex and sometimes loathsome Kyrie said, “It’s basketball. I’ve been in a few environments in my life. If it’s nothing extra, I’m cool with it.’’

Good. Let’s have more of the same Sunday when the Garden is full for Game 4. Boo Irving because he lied to you about staying here and quit on your team. Just as you booed Roger Clemens when he came back here with the Yankees. Just as you would let Rick Pitino have it if he ever walked through that door on Causeway Street. But “nothing extra” please.

It almost makes you wonder - if Kyrie (and Marcus Smart, for that matter) really heard N-bomb(s) when it supposedly happened, why are we only hearing about it now?

Phyllis George, RIP

Shank writes a sports obituary to one of the pioneers in sports broadcasting for ladies.

Former Miss America and CBS Sports television pioneer Phyllis George died last week at the age of 70. A lovely and talented woman, George was an underrated TV talent who joined CBS’s “The NFL Today” in 1975 and blazed a trail for female reporters who later covered the National Football League.

George also had an amazing number of connections to the Celtics. Her breakthrough at CBS came when she interviewed Dave Cowens in Weston in 1974. The foreword for her 2002 book “Never Say Never” was written by Rick Pitino. In 1979, George married John Y. Brown, owner of the Celtics and the man who triggered a trade that forever altered the future of the franchise and almost made Red Auerbach quit.

George might have had something to do with Brown’s fiasco trade. She was engaged to him in February of 1979 when he traded three of Red’s first-round draft picks to New York for scoring champ Bob McAdoo. Nobody ever said anything on the record, but it has long been speculated that Brown made the trade to impress Miss America, who was a McAdoo fan.

March Blandness

It seems like Shank's off the NCAA Tournament bandwagon, and maybe with good reason:

The men’s NCAA tournament used to be great. But now that it’s professional basketball? No thanks.

March Madness! How’s your bracket looking? Got tickets to the big subregional in Providence this coming weekend? Do you think Rick Pitino and Coach Cal could match up on Saturday? Is Cooper Flagg better than Bill Walton? How about that Dan Hurley, huh? Think we’ll see a No. 16 beat a No. 1? Do you hate Duke?

Sweet 16 . . . Elite Eight . . . Final Four . . . Whee!

No thanks, Basketball America. I’ll be sitting this one out. I’m not sure I’d watch the men’s championship game if they played it in my driveway on Monday, April 7.

Seriously. The NCAA men’s basketball tournament used to be great, but I have a hard time understanding how folks invest dollars and emotions in today’s farce that has almost nothing to do with colleges and universities.

“With the Power Four conferences, it’s fraud in terms of terminology,” says Leo Papile, former player personnel director of the Celtics (14 seasons) and presently a senior adviser with the Clippers who founded the Boston Athletic Basketball Club (BABC) 48 years ago. “They use the term ‘student-athletes.’ That’s fraud. If you brought that to trial, it would be very easy to prove that that does not exist. I’m not a scholar, but I know that in order to get a degree, you can’t bounce around three or four schools in four years.”

True that. Not that anyone cares anymore, but when we watch the big schools in this tournament, it’s impossible to buy the notion that we are watching students at play. Oregon traveled more than 26,000 miles to play its Big Ten schedule — yes, Oregon is in the Big Ten — this season. That’s more than the circumference of the Earth. Think those kids are cracking the books or interacting with their schoolmates?

Today’s NCAA basketball is unregulated professional basketball. Frothy fans boost their favorite school, screaming their heads off for skilled professional players, most of whom have zero allegiance to said college, and some of whom maybe never set foot in a classroom or interacted with anyone on campus outside of the athletic department and compliance office.

I largely agree with this, because it is really stupid having a West Coast college like Oregon in the Big Ten (Stanford's also in the Big Ten, or maybe it's the Big Sixteen now) and the NIL money's why all this is happening.

The End Is Near

Hate to agree with Shank, but he may be right about this year's Boston Celtics.

NEW YORK — It feels like the end is near.

When Rajon Rondo went down with a torn ACL in late January, we all wrote the obituary for the 2012-13 Green Team. But then the Celtics started playing well again and we temporarily lost sight of the fact that they have little chance to advance in the playoffs this spring.

Tuesday night the Celtics were beaten, 87-71, in Game 2 of their first-round series with the overrated Knicks and now we are back to remembering what we felt when Rondo first went down.

It is not impossible, of course, for the Celtics to come back in this series. They’ve been down 0-2 and won a series before. They did it in in the spring of 1969 when Bill Russell and Sam Jones were getting ready to retire.

And now, for a little Rick Pitino flashback:

But it doesn’t feel like it’s going to happen this year. Bill Russell is not walking through that door. Sam Jones is not walking through that door. The Celtics scored 8 points in the fourth quarter of Game 1 and 23 points in the second half of Game 2. They shot an aggregate 14 for 63 in the second halves of the two losses.

Also of note - this is Shank's second consecutive quality column, which begs the question: are there any 'end of the world' prophecies in the near future we haven't heard about?