- Start with a provocative (read: absurd) lede.
- Give a few supporting details to flesh out the lede.
- Then regurgitate the backstory, relying on as many previously written sentences and "jokes" as you can.
- Take a shot at the management of whichever team you are writing on that day.
- (Optional) Throw in a reference to Larry Bird.
The emphasis (I don't dare say point, since there wasn't one) of the piece is on John Farrell, but as is his milquetoast way, The CHB doesn't say whether Farrell should be fired; only that it's what people are talking about. Naturally, in pursuit of his trite analysis, he leaves out a few important details.
"After everything that’s happened around here, Farrell knows he’s just one more slump away from the fate that ultimately awaits every man in the corner office at Fenway."
(False. Ralph Houk retired after the 1984 season. You'd think Mr. Curse of the Bambino would know such trivia.)
And "Grady [Little] was buried for one bad decision."
(False. Grady was buried for numerous bad decisions, not the least of which ignoring all the data the team statisticians were coming up with.)
And "How many times do you see a manager/coach fired while his team is still on a path to the playoffs?"
(Often. But under John Henry, it has not happened with the Red Sox; this ownership group has yet to fire a manager mid-season.)
And "Terry Francona's not walking through that door."
(Good. Tito had peaked. It was time for him to go. He had lost control of the clubhouse. Or perhaps The CHB doesn't remember the whole "beer and chicken" fiasco, which would be strange, since he wrote about it endlessly. Still, you'd think The CHB would remember writing about Torey Lovullo and how promising he was when filling in for Farrell over two months last season )
P.S. The Red Sox under Farrell won the 2013 World Series. Guess how many World Series the Indians have won under Tito. Zero. I'll take my chances with Lovullo.