Dan Versus the Pros

OK, let me begin with a slam levelled at one of our erstwhile posters by none other than Dan Shaughnessy's masked defender, the infamous Objective Bruce, affectionately known as "OB."

Quoteth OB [quoting Chris]: "'The vast majority of Boston's professional sports personnel (athletes and management alike) simply turn their back on CHB with utter disdain.' Prove it. Schilling's musings don't count."

All righty then, Brucie. Let us briefly count the ways Danny Boy is consistently iced out on the Boston pro scene, shall we?

Thus far, the Boston Globe has published eleven (11) of Shaughnessy's columns in the month of March. Five (5) of those columns dealt with professional athletes. Are ya with me thus far?

Dan opened the Ides of March with a missive entitled Cassell Trade is a Loud Statement (March 1, 2009), of course dealing with the Patriots' trade of quarterback Matt Cassell to the Kansas City Chiefs. There were NO quotes. Lots of contradictory statements on Dan's part, but NO, I repeat, NO quotes. By the way, he penned the column while in Florida, ostensibly covering spring training, but in reality squandering the Globe's money.

On March 3, 2009, Shaughnessy filed a column with the headline, Masterson on Solid Footing. In it, he quotes Sox manager Francona and pitching coach John Farrell, along with young pitcher Justin Masterson. Frankly, I couldn't determine if Shank got those quotes himself, or culled them from a press conference. My gut says it was the latter, a la his coverage of the Patriots at the Super Bowl last year. Makes sense. On the other hand, Masterson is still so green it's possible he's not yet wise to the ways of the Shankster...

Shank then submitted a column published with the headline An Infusion of Intrigue (March 4, 2009), dealing with Sox outfielder J.D. Drew's never-ending physical problems. Dan quotes Tito -- no doubt from a group briefing -- and Drew, via NESN's Heidi Watney. Thanks, Heidi!

Let's move on, shall we? On March 5, 2009, Dan wrote a column entitled Hip Trouble … and Lip Trouble, driving my compatriot, Dave M., to distraction, as El Shanko hammered Manny (who, I must say, is a piece of drek and -- as Jon Papelbon pointed out -- had become a cancer in the Sox clubhouse before the team jettisoned him ... and slammed A-Roid, er, Rod. (Nice hookers, A-Fraud.)

Anyhoo, Dan quotes Manny and Dodgers' owner Frank McCourt in his piece ... via ESPN. By the way, the CHB was at spring training when he purloined most of this column from previous Shankisms.

After that point in time, Dan limited his topics to high school, junior college and college basketball, with the exception of his March 18, 2009 effort, Hottest of the Heat. Shaughnessy quoted the Miami Heat's D-Wade and head coach Erik Spoelstra. Typical, since those out-of-town pro athletes and coaches generally aren't wary of the Big D.

Otherwise, I think it's fairly obvious that Shank is hamstrung in trying to obtain meaningful quotes from professional athletes, coaches and executives in Boston.

How can you refute it, oh Master of Objectivity?