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Monday, July 21, 2008

Wow

That is the sentiment left after reading today's Shank column. There are a variety of reasons for it.

First, after a three game sweep Dan isn't ready to panic. It is usually these tough losses that Dan gets all cynical and angry, lashing out at the manager, GM, and star players. Not today, except for a gratuitous shot at Manny for a late play in an 11-3 blowout when good guy Alex Cora let in four runs.

Then there is the obligatory "immortal" reference, this time for Erick Aybar. Dan loves to parade his ignorance with his use of the term, but maybe he should know who the starting shortstop is for the MLB team with the best record.

Finally, this column comes a day after Dan gleefully wrote that the Red Sox need not worry because the Angels can never beat the Red Sox in the playoffs. No mention of that claim today. Dan may want to think it over.

12 comments:

roger bournival said...

Meanwhile, general manager Theo Epstein sat behind the backstop, arms folded, wearing his best Ralph Nadar face.

That mush be the immortal Ralph Nadar.

What a chump...

JJS37 said...

I love it when writers and fans think alike. I love it from the standpoint of: you're a writer. You aren't supposed to think like a fan. You are supposed to give us a little more.

Because the Angels haven't beaten the Red Sox before, he actually think that matters should the Sox even show up (the Angels will). He's an idiot. He apparently doesn't understand statistics: if the quarter comes up heads 50 times in a row, the next time you flip it, it's 50/50 for heads. Dumass.

But that's Dan. He likes to give us these incredible tidbits of his that aren't based on any facts. Curses, disembodied acts of will. Nothing is ever an X and an O with this guy. It couldn't be that the Sox won't win, or even get there, because they have a bullpen that closely resembles the "firehouse" in "Farenheit 451." (BTW-I give him permission to use that reference, though at 40 or so years old, it might be too modern for him.)

Douche Bag.

mike_b1 said...

The immortal Dan Shaughnessy will likely eat his immortal words.

Not that anyone will ever notice.

I think it's funny The CHB didn't apply for the Globe buyout. He probably realizes he has no chance of landing a gig elsewhere. Besides a soup kitchen, I mean.

dbvader said...

Dan has hitched his wagon to a tired local shtick. There is nothing in his writing that could support a national writing gig. Clive Rush, Joe Morgan, and Grady Little references won't fly in SI or Sporting News.kht

Chris said...

Shaughnessy is cemented in Boston, and probably at The (immortal) Globe, despite groveling for work at ESPN and (perhaps) elsewhere. His act will never 'play in Peoria.' He has a voice made for the newspaper and a face made for radio.

Objective Bruce said...

Roger makes less and less sense as time marches on.

But that's nowhere near as idiotic as comparing winning baseball games to coin flips. Or deciding that he didn't take the buyout because he can't get a national job. Proclaiming that he is "groveling for work" is pretty weak, too.

"Tired local shtick," thy name is Dan Shaughnessy Watch.

roger bournival said...

Roger makes less and less sense as time marches on.

Pardon me, but what part of that post (or any of my others, for that matter) lacks sense? You constantly harp and harangue on why we need dead tree newspapers (editors, 'fact-checkers', etc.) and I point out an obvious mistake that dead tree publications aren't supposed to make.

Perhaps you can tell me who "Ralph Nadar" is?

mike_b1 said...

Well, let's see, OB:
Peter May - buyout (Yahoo Sports). Jackie Mac - buyout (ESPN TV; raising kids).
Gordon Edes - requested buyout but turned down - (was said to be headed to Yahoo)
Ken Fratus - buyout (ESPN)
Reid Laymance - buyout (St. Louis Post-Dispatch)

So there's plenty of room out there for the rest. Why hasn't Dan left?

Given the host of others who already bailed to ESPN, including Gammons and Don Skwar, you would think the road to Bristol would be paved with gold. And yet...The CHB can't get a job there. Why is that?

Perhaps because it gets harder to self-plagiarize once you leave your Chestnut Hill nest?

Anonymous said...

Why oh why oh why is CHB comparing pedroia to Pete Rose? Isn't that just a little early. And plus isn't there a SECOND BASEMAN out there that Pedroia compares to instead of Rose?

Dan stuffed a "Theo and his Minions" in today's article as well. Add that to the checklist.

In true shank style he went from knee-jerk condemnation of Pedroia to "mea culpa" to calling the kid "The greatest Hitter Ever".

Yes, its all there. Nice.

ObjectiveBruce said...

Where's the proof that Shaughnessy "can't get a job there"? Or that he wants one?

Maybe he does, maybe he doesn't. Damned if I know. Either way, it simply doesn't matter

Buyouts make sense for some people and not for others. Don't presume to understand the circumstances of others.

Oh, and Roger, pissing contests over spelling errors are beneath even you.

roger bournival said...

Oh, and Roger, pissing contests over spelling errors are beneath even you.

Thanks for completely ignoring my point, which still stands.

Anonymous said...

So OB does that mean that everytime someone points out that something you said was wrong (or maybe its not "wrong". Just like Youkilis, you must not think that you've ever struck out to something legitimate), it is in fact what you view as a "pissing contest"?

Is that why you stop posting when DB or Roger or any of the other regulars have you beat?