He Came To Bury Them

As the Red Sox wrap up their 2015 season, Shank expands on his douchebag tweet from yesterday (which one? - ed.) and gives his negativity a full column.

CLEVELAND — In an effort to “close that loop’’ and “make sure we protect ourselves,” Red Sox baseball boss Dave Dombrowski announced Sunday that John Farrell will manage the team next season and that Torey Lovullo has signed a two-year extension to remain as bench coach while forfeiting his right to interview for managerial positions for one year.

Swell. The Sox do not intend to replace the skipper who stepped aside in mid-August to undergo treatment for Stage 1 lymphoma. Meanwhile, the Sox have secured the services of Lovullo, the popular interim manager who was at the helm when the team played better (28-20) over the last six weeks of yet another last-place season. If Farrell at any point is not healthy enough to manage, Lovullo will be present and prepared to take over.

All good.

But what if Farrell is healthy and the Sox get off to another bad start? What if things go sour for a prolonged stretch next season? A number of fans and some voices in the media already have made it clear they believe Lovullo deserves the job. Won’t Lovullo’s presence create a massive distraction?

Looking at the time line of his two tweets on the subject (the first being the announcement of the signings, then the douchebag follow-up tweet posted below), it took him a whopping six minutes to think of the best negative angle available to him. What Shank 'accomplishes' with this column is interject his perpetual negativity into these recent signings and keep people talking about the Red Sox and himself. Mission accomplished.