Hair Raising Column

Pretending to write about Game 2 of the 2015 World Series, Shank milks a theme:

KANSAS CITY, Mo. — Hair. Long, beautiful hair. Here, there, everywhere.

It was Woodstock Meets World Series at Kauffman Stadium Wednesday night as two long-haired moundsmen took the ball at the start of Game 2 of the 111th World Series. It was Kansas City’s Johnny Cueto and his Bob Marley dreadlocks vs. New York’s Jacob deGrom, who appears to be auditioning for the Bee Gees.

Step aside, “Take Me Out To the Ball Game.” Game 2 could have been played to the tune of David Crosby’s “Almost Cut My Hair.’’

Song and band references from the Sixties & Seventies? That's a new one!

From there, the cookie-cutter game recap is done, and one last lame hair reference concludes the 'effort':

The story line rarely changes with the great young players: Hair today . . . gone tomorrow.

Sorry. Couldn’t resist.

For the sake of your readers, maybe you should.