Shank, today:
I’m in. I’m on the Jets bandwagon. I’ve been carrying Fireman Ed on my shoulders all over Pittsburgh, and let me tell you, he’s heavier than he looks.Shank, September 19, 2010:
The Jets, meanwhile, are the blowhards. The Jets are the bullies who cower when the going gets tough. The Jets eat cheeseburgers at practice and laugh about it. They swear on camera. They bask in their status as the It Team of 2010. They have a coach who says, “We know we’re better than you and we’re going to beat the [expletive] out of you.’’ And then they go out on Monday night against Baltimore, commit 14 penalties (125 yards), and produce one of the worst offensive performances (six first downs) anyone can remember.Shank, again today:
If none of these arguments bring you around, you should root for the Jets tonight because you don’t want to root for the Steelers. The Steelers and their fans are babies. By any definition, quarterback Ben Roethlisberger is a boor. If he wins tonight, he’s going to his third Super Bowl, and that’s going to start talk of comparisons with Brady.Shank, November 14, 2010:
The Steelers have won two Super Bowls since the last time the Patriots won one. You want to see them go for a third?
No. You want the Jets.
If you have been to Pittsburgh to watch the Steelers, you know exactly what I am talking about. If you’ve never been, maybe you’ve picked it up just by watching on TV. Pittsburgh is simply the cradle of the NFL.What's tomorrow's column gonna look like if the Steelers beat the Jets today? Do you think he's already at work on that column? I wonder...
The Steelers are about continuity, excellence, toughness, and tradition. They are football’s comfort food. You see the logo on the right side of the helmet and you know you are watching the NFL at its best.
5 comments:
My guess is Shank will do a Schadenfreude piece on how good it was for those frauds the NY Jets to get beaten down by the dynastic Steelers - he might even have an Any Given Sunday moment by noting these same Steelers have been owned by the Patriots since Drew Bledsoe and Curtis Martin ate them for lunch in the 1996 playoffs and that Tom Brady and company feasted on them again this past season. (I'd say he'd also do a love letter to Drew, but that's Borgie's job)
Shank might point out how the Steelers threw the Jets' celebration in Foxboro back into their faces - Shank could even give some credence to Deion Branch's much-mocked seething session about the Jets after that loss ("You just know Deion Branch is using this Jets loss to further his determination for whenever the Patriots play the Jets again" is a possible quote).
Of course it may be too much to ask Shank to expect something like a look at how the Steelers won (basically by hitting a la Meriweather to Todd Heap and by not making too many mistakes; by keeping in mind Sexy Rexy's defense is similar to what the Ravens run) or suggestions of what the Patriots need for the next season - if he goes that route I suspect he'll lapse into the cliches we've been hearing (they gotta get a pash rush, they gotta get a better run game, gotta get real coordinators, etc.) rather than offer some more plauisble ideas (finding a Moss-flavored deep threat, shoring up the line of scrimmage on both sides with some more hitting power, correcting mistakes made a la Crumpler and Branch's drops and communication issues between Chung and the long snapper on the blown punt).
Just wait - Shank will come up with something after the Jets crashed and burned again.
BTW, nice of Shank to manage to be right about the Steelers both ways - Roethlisberger IS a boor and there is a certain level of whinery in Steelers circles; they've also been a pretty uneven team since losing to the Titans in 2002. But they also live up to being the cradle of the NFL and they do stand for continuity, toughness, tradition, and excellence - the roller coaster since 2002 has included one losing season, one .500 season, one 9-7 season, a one-and-out playoff season, three Superbowl trips, and a 15-1 season. The dips in performance don't invalidate the overall muscle of this team.
Is there a point to this or do I need to consult my Esperanto to English dictionary?
Bruce, ask Shank that question.
My advice? Consult your Esperanto dictionary, you snotty, pretentious gasbag.
I thought I was going to be 'easy pickings' back in September 2009. What's a matta, Bruce? Did someone snip your gonads off, or were you just WRONG?
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