Off The Bandwagon So Early, Shank?

I've been saying this for a while now - Shank will be all over Bobby Valentine when the first three game losing streak happens.

DETROIT - Bring back Terry Francona?

Why not bring back Joe Kerrigan, Butch Hobson, Dave Lewis, and Pete Carroll while we’re at it?

Did Bobby Valentine have any idea what he was getting himself into?

With many Dan Shaughnessy columns, we are 'treated' to Shankisms, lame lyric fragments and overused words. Today's treats are 'hideous', 'emotional rescue', and a new one for the Shank lexicon, "Schiraldi Eyes" - the eyes a pitcher has as his last pitch achieves lunar orbit. It's the new 'Way Back Wasdin'!

Surely you're keeping track of all this, right? You're not? The ever helpful Shank's right on cue:

If you’re still keeping track, the Red Sox now have lost 23 of their last 30 games. Last season’s 0-6 start has surrendered to this season’s 0-3 as they prepare for the Blue Jays Monday night at Rogers Centre.

To paraphrase a Globe commenter from last year - "Good thing there's always a losing team, or Shank would have nothing to write about."