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Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Last Legs?

Putting aside for a moment the complete inanity of The CHB's latest effort, let's recap his coverage since coming back from his own private Idaho (or wherever the hell he was for the better part of May):
* A groundbreaking, insider's look at Harvard's equipment man, whose name (Chet Stone) sounds like a porn star's.
* A trio of dispatches from the crucial Twins-Red Sox series.
* A rewrite of his tongue-in-cheek breakdown of the typical Boston fan.

In the Boston fan piece, he interviews the two village idiots, Bob Lobel and Gerry Callahan, perhaps with the rare insight that by putting those two clowns front and center, it would take the attention (and heat) off Dan himself.

In the pieces from Minneapolis, he can barely cast a middle finger toward the Sox; the worst insult he can manage is to call the then-tepid Boston offense "vaunted." He actually sounds like he feels sorry for Matt Clement.

He is clearly picking his spots, picking subjects and taking positions that are of such little interest to the five readers he has left that no one will bother to criticize him.

In today's column, two items stick out, and for all the wrong reasons.

1. What Dan wrote: "But what about the absurdity of Frank Robinson not making baseball's 30-man All-Century team in 2000? Mark McGwire was on that team. Pete Rose was on that team. Ken Griffey Jr. was on that team. No room for Frank -- a guy who could hit, run, field, and throw? The MVP in both leagues? Pete Rose over Frank Robinson?"
What Dan didn't write: Anything about the omission at the time it occurred.

2. What Dan wrote: "Frank Robinson is quite possibly the most underrated player in the history of baseball. Certainly he got his props, making the Hall of Fame in his first year of eligibility and being part of 12 All-Star teams. He remains the only man to win the MVP award in both leagues and had his No. 20 uniform jersey retired by both the Reds and Orioles. He was Rookie of the Year with the Reds in 1956 and in 1975 became the first African-American to manage in the majors. Ever-dramatic, Robinson homered in his first game as player-manager of the Indians."

This graf is The CHB in a nutshell. A hypothesis statement, followed by a point by point ticking off of occasionally random facts that completely obliterate that very hypothesis. And amid all Dan is completely oblivious to the fact that his "proof" does not support his argument. Quintessential Shaughnessy.

And it's just another shovel of dirt cast on the vestiges of a mediocre career.

3 comments:

fadedredsoxhat said...

How does CHB mail it in every day and get away with it? He's not a deep enough thinker for the fandemonium assignment. The Frank Robinson column was a boring read for a baseball legend that deserves better. Wednesday's column was just flat out stupid. Chief, how do you do this without rotting your brain?

The Chief said...

Brain...on...last...legs...can't suffer any more C..H..B...

jenny said...

I guess I'm too young and baseball-centered to read today's column. I didn't understand any of it. I didn't know 75% of the players he referred to (all the non-baseball ones) and I didn't get any of his movie/song references. Bleh. Cry me a river.