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Friday, December 30, 2005

Dave Barry He's Not

The man with the Will Ferrell perm's tongue-in-cheek take on the headlines of 2006 is notable only for its lack of humor.

He does manage to flame nemeses past and present including, in order, Bob Kraft, Jim Rice, Peyton Manning, Theo Epstein, Bill Parcells, Manny Ramírez, Johnny Damon, the Red Sox, Theo Epstein (again), the Red Sox (again), "dome-bellied Curt Schilling," the Celtics, Nomar Garciaparra, Charlie Jacobs, Theo Epstein (again), and the Red Sox (again). And he throws in a few buddies -- well, Larry Lucchino, four times -- for balance (or lack of creativity).

Dan, you may look like Will Ferrell and you may dress like Will Ferrell, but you ain't no Will Ferrell. And if you must rip off Dave Barry, it helps to be funny.

Larry Bird watch: "Dec. 7: FRENCH LICK, Ind. -- Larry Bird turned 50. He said he still loves Ron Artest."

Sensitivity watch: "A couple of 30-something fanboy bloggers posed as reporters, but were banished when they used their notepads to procure autographs (the Schilling jerseys gave them away). One of their moms picked them up in a minivan." I guess the CHB is not happy about this site. Wonder why?

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

wow, he DOES dress like will ferrell!

Mitch said...

I chuckled at the Ordway takedown.

Amy said...

I LOVE your site! Keep up the good work.

At the end of this column, he suggests that the Red Sox will sell seats in the dugout. An 'EEI caller suggested that recently. He totally stole that. I hope that caller raises his hands and says that was his idea first. ;)

Anonymous said...

I thought the line about the fanboy bloggers was hilarious.

I guess it just hit you too close to home.

Get out much?

The Chief said...

Obviously you forgot my earlier post about seeing you in Borders, Dan.

Beth said...

the "fanboy bloggers" theme developing in his articles is getting to be completely pathetic.

threatened much?

btw...not all fan bloggers are BOYS.