The CHB has a new nickname!
Yes, it seems every generation of baseball player gifts Shank with a pet name. Back in 2000 Carl Everett coined the Curly Haired Boyfriend. And David Ortiz has now pegged him with a new one: "the reporter with the red jheri curl from the Boston Globe."
Awesome.
This shows up in today's ready, fire, aim column in which The CHB (sorry, the RJC) attacks Ortiz for having the temerity to complain about the dark cloud of suspicion that follows him ever since his name showed up on the Mitchell Report.
The CHB (sorry, old habits die hard!), of course, insists that, despite a lack of proof, that Big Papi must be cheating, because no man that is so beloved in Boston could possibly be on the level.
In a classic moment of irony, Shank writes that Ortiz's observations on the color and nature of The CHB's CH are incorrect and yet "these are not the errors or details that are bothersome in your essay."
The CHB cares about accuracy? Who knew?
The rest is a rehash of perhaps every conversation Shank ever had with Papi. In reading it (don't bother), one comes away with the impression that The RJC has been watching too much Court TV.
Larry Bird watch! (That's twice in three columns.)
Showing posts with label Carl Everett. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Carl Everett. Show all posts
Saturday, March 28, 2015
Tuesday, October 09, 2012
Mr. Manners
Booing is wrong, and people who do it are bad, bad, bad!
So sayeth the Shank, who in a way reminiscent of Miss Manners, expresses his distaste for the fans' lack of civility and his manlove for a Chief lineman who criticized the crowd for piling on after Matt Cassel was knocked out of the game.
Now, let's get one thing straight: The Chiefs fans weren't actually cheering because Cassel got hurt; they were cheering because he would no longer be in the game, manning a club that has gone 22-31 since his arrival from New England prior to the 2009 season. They had a point: Cassel's QB rating is a pedestrian 81% for his career, a mark he's topped only once in the four seasons he's helmed the Chiefs.
But this is where The CHB's hypocrisy switched into overdrive: "I’ve certainly done my share of tweaking and exposing professional athletes or organizations who don’t give an honest effort to live up to their contracts or fulfill the team-fan accord."
Would that be "tweaking" like when he called David Ortiz a sad sack of you-know-what? Was it tweaking when he called Carl Everett "the Ebola virus of the Boston clubhouse?" Or when he wrote “We have rejoiced in the retirement of Keith Foulke?” Would that be "exposing" when he wrote, "Why does America hate Barry Bonds so much? Is it because he's too good?" all while neglecting to mention Bonds' PED use for another five years. Was that exposing when he accused Manny Ramirez, the previous season's World Series MVP, of quitting on the team during a month where he put up a .930 OPS and 6 HRs in 24 games?
No, that would just be the Holy Cross Hypocrite, doing what he does best.
So sayeth the Shank, who in a way reminiscent of Miss Manners, expresses his distaste for the fans' lack of civility and his manlove for a Chief lineman who criticized the crowd for piling on after Matt Cassel was knocked out of the game.
Now, let's get one thing straight: The Chiefs fans weren't actually cheering because Cassel got hurt; they were cheering because he would no longer be in the game, manning a club that has gone 22-31 since his arrival from New England prior to the 2009 season. They had a point: Cassel's QB rating is a pedestrian 81% for his career, a mark he's topped only once in the four seasons he's helmed the Chiefs.
But this is where The CHB's hypocrisy switched into overdrive: "I’ve certainly done my share of tweaking and exposing professional athletes or organizations who don’t give an honest effort to live up to their contracts or fulfill the team-fan accord."
Would that be "tweaking" like when he called David Ortiz a sad sack of you-know-what? Was it tweaking when he called Carl Everett "the Ebola virus of the Boston clubhouse?" Or when he wrote “We have rejoiced in the retirement of Keith Foulke?” Would that be "exposing" when he wrote, "Why does America hate Barry Bonds so much? Is it because he's too good?" all while neglecting to mention Bonds' PED use for another five years. Was that exposing when he accused Manny Ramirez, the previous season's World Series MVP, of quitting on the team during a month where he put up a .930 OPS and 6 HRs in 24 games?
No, that would just be the Holy Cross Hypocrite, doing what he does best.
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