The Cooler Gets Shelved

Fewer things get Shank revved up and ready to write like taking a dump on a former member of the Boston Red Sox.

LOS ANGELES — The World Series is back in Los Angeles.

The Cooler is not.

According to the Los Angeles Times, Adrian Gonzalez is vacationing with his family in Europe as the Dodgers play in their first World Series 29 years. He went on the disabled list with a back injury Sept. 28 and has not been seen since that day. He still has a year left on a contract that pays him $21.5 million.

Does anyone think his salary would be mentioned if Gonzo was making $5 million? Yeah, me neither.

It’s probably a good thing for the Dodgers. Gonzalez, after all, is The Cooler. He rides shotgun with bad karma.

Red Sox fans certainly remember Gonzalez. He was the sweet-swinging middle-of-the-lineup guy who inspired Theo Epstein to trade prospect Anthony Rizzo to San Diego after the 2010 season.

Remember when Shank was singing his praises? Ancient history.

By the way that last link was the third column in successive days that Shank wrote, practically fellating the guy.

In Boston, Gonzalez was the sour clubhouse contrarian who complained about Sunday night games, said it was “God’s will’’ when the Sox perpetrated the greatest choke in September history, then explained the 2011 chicken-and-beer fiasco by saying, “A man’s got to eat.’’

Read the rest of the column. It's one of the decent columns he's written recently, and the only reason it's good is that he gets to take shots and otherwise write in negative terms about a former member of the Red Sox. It's the only time he seems engaged in his writing.