Thursday, July 29, 2010

What An Asshole

I could have gone with an alternate headline, say, 'I Was Wrong' when describing the belief that Shank would not discuss the recent 6 - 4 road trip by the Red Sox. However, the real headline barely captures my complete disgust with this columnist.

Dan Shaughnessy, July 27, 2010:

ANAHEIM, Calif. — Reading Red Sox dispatches from Oakland and Seattle was depressing. The estimable Amalie Benjamin and indefatigable Pete Abraham kept me up to date as the Sox stumbled out West, but I had to come out here to see for myself. The SS Francona is taking on water, listing badly, and I wanted one last look before it sinks into the Pacific, under the Theo Epstein Bridge to 2011.
Dan Shaughnessy, two fucking days later:

ANAHEIM, Calif. — I’m in. I believe. I just saw Marco Scutaro hit a grand slam to complete a three-game Red Sox sweep of the Angels. The Sox look like they are ready for a big stretch run.

The Sox just played 10 games in 10 days in three cities. They won six, lost four, and ordered room service 214 times. They looked dead in Seattle, and now they are coming home with bounce in their step and real hopes for August and September.
Dan Shaughnessy, the ultimate fair weather friend, turns on a dime yet again based on essentially a three game stretch. Dan Shaughnessy, shamelessly back on the bandwagon after pointing out all that is wrong with the Red Sox two weeks ago. Hypocritical Dan Shaughnessy, after many articles bemoaning the lack of offense of the Red Sox (sorry, there's too many of them to link to), now bursts with pride (and finally acknowledges) about the batting lineup:

Offense? For all the winter worries about scoring runs, the Sox are second in the league in runs and homers. They hit four jacks yesterday, including Scutaro’s bases-loaded blast that cracked open a 3-3 game in the eighth inning. They have had more doubles than Don Draper and the boys at Sterling-Cooper.
Nice to see Shank upgrade pop culture references from the Seinfeld era, isn't it?

A single begrudging acknowledgement of his past criticisms of the Red Sox is the only redeeming quality I see in this column:

I came to Los Angeles to bury them, but now my glass is half-full.
More like half full of shit. It's both amusing and infuriating to see the alleged ace Boston Globe sports columnist act like a flighty, ditzy high school blonde that can barely make up his or her mind on anything, much less stick to his convictions for any length of time greater than a couple of days. Either that, or this is part of a huge game he's playing just to get a few more eyeballs on his columns. Whichever it is, he's still an asshole.


HeavyD said...

It's days like this where I thank God for the Dan Shaughnessy Watch. From the moment I read this ridiculous column, I couldn't wait to see what DSW's take would be. And I'm pleased that you didn't disappoint.

God, I hate this guy. Why do I still read him and get myself all worked up? Must be a disease.

Anonymous said...

LMFAO!.....Roger, don't hold back....tell us what you REALLY think about Shank.....ha,ha, ha...that was CLASSIC.....great job!

Anonymous said...

Asshole as in Turncoat

I can't handle reading the Globe but I do enjoy DSW.

Asshole is a better description than Turncoat but ... you can plug and they used to shoot the other ...


A turncoat is a person who shifts allegiance from one loyalty or ideal to another, betraying or deserting an original cause by switching to the opposing side or party. In political and social history, this is distinct from being a traitor, as the switch mostly takes place under the following circumstances:

• In groups, often driven by one or more leaders.
• When the former cause driving and benefitting the person becomes inviable or too fraught with danger.


• As time goes by, along with the embracing of life under the new circumstances comes a need of burying and rewriting the past by concealing evidence. The fear of the past coming to upset the newly-found stability is always present in the mind of the turncoat. The past is rewritten and whitewashed to cover former deeds. When successful, this activity results in the distortion and falsification of historical events.