Thursday, January 08, 2009

Real Simple

Dan's Celtics column in three easy steps:

1) Things are going bad - insert clever remarks about losing to the Lakers, Knicks, and Bobcats.

2) There are many theories as to why things are going bad - insert a bunch of quotations; list the many theories, never offer a solid opinion on any of them.

3) Things will get better - Don't try to explain, just simply conclude the Celtics will do better:
He means it. Fans and media might be a tad nervous, but the guys in the locker room are not worried. They've got a ton of experience and they've got a ring and they know how to fight through the NBA's midwinter blues.


Roger Bournival said...

Fans and media might be a tad nervous, but the guys in the locker room are not worried.

Shank would know, since he has close personal relationships with many Boston area athletes. Right?

mike_b1 said...

Yeah, like with Meghann Shaughnessy, his niece.

Oh wait, the family reportedly ostracized her after she married her tennis coach.

Always wondered why The CHB didn't go after her for steroids after she put on 15 pounds of muscle in one year. Even Nomar didn't do that. But again, she's white, he's not.

Chris said...

Roger, I've never believed for a moment that someone so hell-bent on speaking negatively could have ANY 'close, personal relationships' with Boston sports personalities. I refuse to believe it. In fact, you never see quotes from people in his columns, aside from those cobbled together from pool reports or media gatherings (where Shank is usually cowering in the back). If Shaughnessy really had 'close, personal relationships,' don't you think they'd display themselves in the form of quotes only he had? That's the tell-tale sign for me: There never are any quotes.

Roger Bournival said...

Chris - sorry, I was being sarcastic. I'm well aware of Shank's lack of friends & contacts among athletes.

(from a previous thread)

"The Boston Globe ain't going anywhere."

Ahhh, but someone is:

KING 5 news has learned that Seattle may soon become a one newspaper town.

Like many newspapers across America the Seattle Post-Intelligencer has been struggling to survive.

Now, a source close to the deal tells KING 5 that the paper's owner, Hearst Corporation, will announce as soon as tomorrow that it's putting the P-I up for sale. Under the joint operating agreement between the P-I and The Seattle Times, the P-I must be offered for sale for at least 30 days before it can cease operation.

The joint operating agreement was formed in 1983 in an effort to keep both papers healthy. The P-I was granted a monopoly on morning publication. At that time The Seattle Times was one of the only profitable afternoon papers in the country.

But in 1999 the joint operating agreement was modified to allow the Times to begin publishing in the morning. Critics predicted that would eventually lead to the demise of the P-I.

We're told Hearst does not expect another buyer to step forward and that Seattle will likely become a one newspaper town within the next few months.

A call to the Seattle P-I publisher's office for comment has not yet been returned.

It would be the end of an era - the P-I put out its first edition in 1863 and was the city's first newspaper.

It's unclear how this will affect The Seattle Times or the Blethen family, which owns 51 percent of that paper.

Newspapers across the land are dying, but OB would have us believe otherwise, at least with respect to the Boston Globe?

ObjectiveBruce said...

mike_b1 has won, and retired, the trophy for the most tawdry entry on this blog.

As for the Seattle P-I, there's no comparison to the Globe, despite the fanatical wishes of ideologues.

The Post-Intelligencer has been dying for decades, the Blethens have been trying to get out of the JOA for years and tried to kill it off five years ago but settled for a deal that set a 2016 date with the executioner for the P-I, Hearst has no problem walking away from a JOA as it demonstrated in San Francisco and has already pocketed $24M for agreeing to forgo a guaranteed one-third of future profits if it suspends publication; and the P-I has been struggling mightily ever since the Times became an AM. Wouldn't be surprising to see the Blethen family sell Seattle and The Portland Press-Herald to Hearst.

What does this mean for The Boston Globe? Absolutely nothing.

mike_b1 said...

mike_b1 has won, and retired, the trophy for the most tawdry entry on this blog.

Woo hoo! I knew you like me best!

Chris said...

Seattle P-I for sale; will shut down if no buyer found. Just like bad weather moves west to east, so will this. "Jack Welch ain't walkin' through that door, Dan."

Roger Bournival said...

What does this mean for The Boston Globe? Absolutely nothing.

I wonder what this means for the Boston Globe?

The struggling Boston Globe is still operating and putting out a newspaper.

But city planners and private developers are already measuring the Globe’s Morrissey Boulevard property for the day when the financially strapped broadsheet might abandon or sell off its prime site along Interstate 93.

A Boston Redevelopment Authority task force is even getting ready to recommend that the Globe’s property - along with other commercial buildings on Morrissey Boulevard - be rezoned for mixed-use residential and commercial buildings.

(You mean, like dorms? - Ed.)

“There is no intention of pushing the Globe out,” said Donald Walsh, chairman of the BRA’s Columbia Point Master Plan Task Force, noting the Globe would be “grandfathered” into any zoning changes for the area. “(But) we don’t know what will happen to the area.”

Globe officials, who have not participated in task force meetings, may not even be aware of the proposed zoning changes, according to a source. Spokesmen for the Globe and its parent, the New York Times [NYT] Co., couldn’t be reached for comment.

The New York Times Co., hit by falling revenue and profits like other newspaper companies, reportedly is seeking to sell some of its units to raise cash - including its stake in the partnership that owns the Boston Red Sox [team stats] and NESN cable TV station.

Some private developers have reportedly submitted offers to purchase the Globe’s 10-acre site and then lease it back to the paper. The Globe hasn’t responded to those offers, a source said.

The Times Co. - desperate to raise cash as a $400 million line of credit is set to expire in May - has reportedly been trying to find a buyer for its share of its new Manhattan headquarters building and craft a similar leaseback deal. But the company appears to have timed the market poorly.

Fanatical ideologues of the world, unite!

Chris said...

Of course, no mention is made about the land being re-zoned for 'affordable housing,' Barney Frank's pet project and the reason why this country is in (or close to) financial ruin. I think the end-game for the Boston Globe will be a closure of the print side, with only the web remaining. Of course, they still won't extract meaningful revenue from that model because they haven't been able to yet.

ObjectiveBruce said...

Okay so now the fact that the BRA, the authority with authority for land-use planning in Boston, is looking at what is basically an industrial site in an increasingly non-industrial city creates some kind of sign that the Globe is at death's door.

Actually, the agency is doing its job. It ought to be on top of the possible re-use of any conveniently located, accessible industrial site; that is the trend and the future of cities, the reuse of land.

Sale of Morrissey Blvd. might make sense from a land-use point of view; the property is clearly suitable for a higher use and has decent value as improvable land. Publishing elsewhere makes economic sense; there's little reason to sit on an asset that could be sold for a good sum and replaced at relatively low cost. Don't ever forget that Purcell's purchase of the Herald was first and foremost a real estate deal.

But even if the plant is moved, the Globe isn't going anywhere; it'll be a daily newspaper for a long time to come,despite the dreams of the "shoot the messenger" faction of the right which blames all inconvenient truth on "the mainstream media."

Affordable housing is not the reason the country has economic problems; the issue is the run-up in prices for homes caused by a banking industry ever-eager to write "creative" mortgages to justify, support and create falsely inflated real estate prices. We're talking 80/20 loans, 40 year amortization on 30 year notes, adjustables of every scent, and other banker's tricks which caused a false run-up in real estate prices to the point where the only way people could afford housing was to participate in the very mortgage schemes which drove prices unnaturally high in the firstplace.

As for Mike_b1, I would expect nothing less than a tawdry response.

Monkeesfan said...

Bruce, you left out that the government led by Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae paid banks to make bad loans. And what does this have to do with Shank, anyway?

Dave M said...

Monkeesfan is exactly right. How the government escapes blames for this crisis is amazing

On a side note - I am on vacation with limited internet access and apologize for not posting on the Pedroia column. Will be back next week

Dave M

JJS37 said...

His article doesn't say anything. It says:

• The Celtics are in a slump. Really?
• They've been in one since Christmas. Really?
• The guys in the locker room believe in themselves. Really?
• A bunch of quotes of people saying stuff we've already heard and are completely inconsequential. Really?
• Don't worry. They'll get out of it. Really?

I honestly think that my 5th graders could have written this. "Today, boys and girls, we are going to learn how to write an entire column, and not say anything. Then, we'll get awards for it later on..."

I'm disappointed there was no:

• Mention of Larry Bird
• Shot at Schilling
• Shot at Bill Belichick
• Shot at Boston Sports fans

Does he go home, act like a wise ass douche bag, and his wife and kids go "Ohh..he's so witty!! Look how witty he is!!"

Or do they say under their breath, "God, what a douche bag. Get some friends. Get a therapist. Just shutup."