Finished Business

The 2023 Boston Celtics lost Game 7 of the Eastern Conference finals last night in painful fashion. When a local sports team exits the playoffs, Shank is all over them and this one is no exception:

Celtics’ loss to Heat in Game 7 was a meltdown of epic proportions in Boston sports

There have been some stink bombs detonated by Boston teams in big games throughout the decades.

This may have been the most foul of all.

On a postcard-perfect Memorial Day, with the entire region braced for an 0-3 comeback that would mirror what those Curse-busting Red Sox did 19 years ago, the poser Celtics submitted a woeful Game 7 effort in the Eastern Conference finals and were thrashed by the so-much-mentally-tougher, eighth-seeded Miami Heat, 103-84, Monday night at the Garden.

So there. The Green Team’s spring of “Unfinished Business” is officially finished. And, sadly, the only takeaway is that your 2022-23 Celtics were front-running frauds. I mean, did they really deserve another trip to the Finals after the way they played with their food all year?

Don’t take it from me. Listen to NBA Hall of Famer Charles Barkley. At halftime of this embarrassment, Chuck told the TNT audience, “Watching these dumbass Celtics play is making my head hurt … It’s so bad to watch them play. There’s no ball movement, there’s no body movement, and its frustrating watching a team with this much talent just play stupid.’’

You can always tell one thing by the way this column starts out - when a local pro sports team is at its worst, Shank's at his best.

Two Ways To Make History

Sounds like Shank's about to hop back on the bandwagon, doesn't it?

Instead of being history, the Celtics have a real chance to make history after dominating Heat in Game 5

It’s been building since they took back the night in the second half of Game 4 in Miami, and now it feels very real. The Boston Celtics are halfway home to a return to the NBA Finals.

One hundred and fifty NBA teams have tried, and 150 have failed, but your Celtics think they can become the first team in league history to recover from a 3-0 playoff deficit. The Celtics blew the roof off the Causeway Street gym Thursday, bolting to a 17-point first-quarter lead, pushing it to 24 in the fourth, and running the Heat out of town in with a wire-to-wire 110-97 Game 5 victory.

Shank's very familiar with the concept of running things out of town.

Anything Can Happen

The Boston Celtics won Game 4 of the Eastern Conference finals last night to give them some hope. Naturally, Shank brings up an event from nine years ago:

Celtics got their first win over Heat, and Kevin Millar knows anything can happen now

MIAMI — What now? Does Kevin Millar come to the Garden Thursday with a bottle of Jack Daniel’s?

It’s only one game, but the Celtics crawled out of a hole Tuesday and finally beat the Heat, 116-99, to stay alive in their Eastern Conference final series. Derek Jeter and Alex Rodriguez were at the game and I’m hoping some wiseguy asked The Captain if he believes a team from Boston can win four straight after trailing, three games to none.

Between now and Thursday, the Celtics and their fans will be reminding everyone that the Red Sox turned that trick against the Yankees in 2004.

They shouldn't, but they just might do so.

When the Celtics were annihilated in Game 3 Sunday, Millar knew his phone was going to blow up.

“I get requests for hockey teams, high school teams, you name it,” he said Monday. “I had to do one for Chad Bradford [Millar’s teammate with the Sox in ‘05] the other day. He called me and said, ‘Hey, buddy, haven’t seen you in a while. Need you to make a call for me to inspire a team I’m coaching. Can you send ‘em a message?’

“Until somebody else does it, that clip lives forever and it gets used for any team that gets down, 3-0.”

And now for the fun part:

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“That clip” refers to Millar’s maniacal message of optimism that was beautifully captured in ESPN’s 30 for 30 documentary, “Four Days in October."

Millar was wired for sound as he bounced around Fenway in the hours before Game 4 of the 2004 ALCS. The Sox had been savaged, 19-8, at Fenway one night earlier and trailed in the series, 3-0. But Millar was upbeat, telling everyone, “Don’t let us win this game. Don’t count the Sox out. It never happened in the history of baseball, but if there’s a group of idiots that can do it, it’s us."

He was eager to talk with me that night because I’d written that the Sox were in danger of being remembered as a “pack of frauds” if they got broomed by the Yankees.

Disgraceful

That's the rather harsh word Shank uses to describe last night's 'effort' by the Boston Celtics:

Game 3 was a disgraceful performance by the once-proud Celtics. Even though it’s not over, don’t you want it to be?

MIAMI — A lifetime of incorrect predictions has taught me that it’s dangerous to prematurely state that any series is over. Yogi Berra was right. It ain’t over ‘til it’s over.

But man, oh, man. Don’t you just want this Celtics season to be over?

In another hail of turnovers, technicals, airballs, matador defenses, and nonstop complaints to the officials, the once-proud Boston Celtics were defeated yet again by the estimable, eighth-seeded Miami Heat Sunday, 128-102. Miami led by 8 after one, by 15 at the half, and stretched it to 33 midway through the third. At that point, it felt as if the Celtics had simply quit.

And yet poor coach Joe Mazzulla still will not say anything bad about his rollover players.

“I just didn’t have ‘em ready to play,’’ said the kid coach. “I should have . . . Whatever it was, I have to get them in a better place. That’s on me . . . I think they’re doing everything they can . . . I just didn’t execute the proper game plan. It’s on me to be better so they can play better.’’

Can't Trust 'Em

With Game 1 of the Eastern Conference finals in the books, Shank's now singing a different tune about the Boston Celtics:

It’s only Game 1, but after a dysfunctional loss to the Heat, how can we trust these Celtics?

How can we ever trust these Boston Celtics?

ESPN Analytics said the Celtics have a 97 percent chance of beating the Miami Heat in the Eastern Conference finals. The Green were 8-point favorites going into Game 1 at home Wednesday.

Jayson Tatum and Co. led by 13 in the first half, and 9 at intermission.

But they lost, 123-116.

Wow.

Bill Belichick watched upstairs with Boston basketball boss Brad Stevens. At some point, the Hoodie must have turned to his suite mate and asked, “How come your young coach never calls time out?’’

The tough, undrafted, underdogs from Miami outscored the Celtics, 46-25, in the third quarter. And Boston’s rookie coach Joe Mazzulla never called time during the Heat-induced meltdown. He just stood back and let it all be. It was a stunner.

The Pat Riley Column

With the Boston Celtics and Miami Heat due to square off for the 2023 Eastern Conference title, Shank takes a look at one of the best basketball coaches of all-time, current Heat president Pat Riley:

The man behind the Heat is Pat Riley, still at work to beat the rival Celtics

He’s 78 years old, works his magic behind the scenes, and looks like an aging Michael Douglas or Gordon Gekko.

You probably won’t hear his opinions about Celtics vs. Heat.

Like Bill Belichick, Pat Riley believes in one voice for an organization. And that voice should be the team’s head coach.

Riley is in Boston this weekend, just as he was here in 1984, ‘85, and ‘87 when the NBA staged the Celtics-Lakers Ali-Frazier three-act play that vaulted the NBA into prime-time, must-see TV.

Say hello to Riley if you see him downtown. And know that he is the man behind the Miami Heat you’re watching this week and next.

The Heat president is still current, still a genius of NBA team-building, forever a Celtic rival and nemesis. He’s the man who hired Hall of Fame-bound Erik Spoelstra to follow him as Heat coach in 2008.

Riley has built a roster of 15 tough guys — including seven undrafted players — and they’re in the conference finals for the third time in four seasons. They’re also a No. 8 seed that had to endure two play-in games just to make the tournament.

Good, solid colum by Shank - it's worth reading in full.

Finals Bound

That's Shank after the Celtics won Game 7 of the Eastern Conference Finals:

Finally, the Celtics earn their chance to bring another championship to Boston

Remember all the parades between 2002 and 2019 . . . back in the good old days before COVID-19?

The Celtics earned a ticket to the 2022 NBA Finals with a thrilling, smashmouth, 100-96, Game 7 victory over the top-seeded Heat Sunday night at FTX Arena in Miami. Boston led the entire game and staved off a furious late-game comeback by Jimmy Butler and the Heat.

This means that after three, predominantly pandemic-plagued years, confetti could rain on Boylston Street next month for the first time since Tom Brady beat the Rams to win a Super Bowl in February 2019.

Playing in the image of franchise forefathers Bill Russell, KC Jones and Dennis Johnson, the Celtics were the best defensive team in the NBA this year and now-ready-for-primetime stars Jayson Tatum (26 points), Jaylen Brown (24), and Marcus Smart (24) are finally going to the Finals.

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This new generation of Celtic stars has a chance to extend our local sports High Renaissance (12 championships in the new millennium), which started with 24-year-old Brady upsetting the St. Louis Rams in New Orleans in February 2002.

This looks like Shank's usual modus operandi - set the Celtics up with high to unreasonable expectations so he can take a monster dump on them should they fail to acheive those expectations.

Don't Blow It!

The Boston Celtics won Game 4 of the Eastern Conference semifinals in fairly impressive fashion. Leave it to Mr. Glass Half Empty to accentuate the negative:

If the Celtics don’t win the series, it will be one of the biggest blown opportunities in Boston sports history

We are four games into this bizarro Eastern Conference final and the only takeaway is that No One Knows Anything and it’s now a best-of-three with Miami holding home-court advantage the rest of the way.

Folks in these parts certainly think the Celtics are the better team and there was nothing on display at TD Garden Monday that would dispute that notion. In a wildly unpredictable series that’s seen sparse late-game drama and multiple beatdowns by both squads, it was the Celtics turn to freeze the Heat in a 102-82 Game 4 rout.

“We didn’t want to go down 3-1,’’ said Celtics coach Ime Udoka. “It wasn’t our best offensive night [39.7 percent shooting from the floor], but we can always rely on our defense. We can do that even if our shots are not falling.’’

If the Celtics don’t win this series and advance to the NBA Finals, this will go down as one of the biggest blown opportunities in Boston sports history.

But Never Downplaying A Loss

That's just how he rolls:

After Celtics took a stunning loss in Game 3, there’s no telling what to expect in Game 4

Hold off on those round-trip plane tickets to San Francisco for the NBA Finals.

And forget about Celtics-In-Five.

Two days after dominating Miami in Game 2, the Celtics stumbled to a 26-point, first-half deficit in Game 3 and suffered a well-deserved 109-103 loss to the still-proud, Heat Saturday night at the Garden.

On a night when both Marcus Smart and Jayson Tatum suffered injuries, went to the locker room, then made Drama King returns, Boston cut a 26 point lead all the way down to one point, 93-92, with 2:40 left, only to fall short. Jaylen Brown led the Celtics with 40 points, but committed seven turnovers. Tatum shot 3 for 14 and had six turnovers in 40 uninspiring minutes. An energized Bam Adebayo scored 31 with 10 rebounds and 6 assists for the winners.

Downplaying A Win

I know, it's really out of character for Shank to do such a thing:

It’s only one game, but the Celtics responded emphatically in Game 2 against the Heat

MIAMI — Let’s not go overboard. It’s only one game. I remember mocking Kareem Abdul-Jabbar and the mighty Lakers when the Larry Bird Celtics beat LA, 148-114, in Game 1 of the 1985 Finals. Those proud Lakers wound up winning that series in six, dancing on the fabled parquet while New England wept.

But here in the Hub of Hoop, there’ll be a temptation to get carried away after what we watched at FTX Arena Thursday night. Some of you no doubt are already dreaming of that Boston-Golden State matchup in the NBA Finals.

The 2021-22 Celtics vaporized the Miami Heat, 127-102, in Game 2 of the Eastern Conference finals. Two days after a disheartening, shorthanded, 11-point loss, the Celtics (almost) got their whole team back and demolished a tough, worthy Miami team.

More realistic folks would say 'we won one in their building; so far, so good.' I suppose Shank's citing the 1985 series to tamper expectations, which is fine. I also suppose, as far as team personnel and matchups are concerned, the two sides in the aforementioned 1985 series were a lot closer than the current edition of the Celtics and Miami Heat. You could make the argument (successfully) that the 1985 Lakers team was amongst the top teams of all time - Kareem, Magic, Worthy, Michael Cooper Byron Scott, Bob McAdoo - that's a solid group. After Jimmy Butler and Bam Adebayo, I don't know who belongs in that echelon of great players; I'll say Jayson Tatum, Jalen Brown and Marcus Smart (the Michael Cooper lockdown defender counterpart) give them the edge in this series.

I think, as always, Shank's column is some sort of setup in the case the Celtics barf up this series.

Not Enough Game

For those who watched the game, Game 1 of the Eastern Conference Finals was not a good one for the Boston Celtics:

Celtics were game, but without Marcus Smart and Al Horford, they didn’t have enough against Heat in opener

MIAMI — Opening night of the Eastern Conference finals got off to a rotten start for the Celtics.

No Marcus Smart (bruised foot). Then, without warning, no Al Horford (health and safety protocol).

Losing Smart and Horford against the rested, top-seeded Heat made Tuesday’s Game 1 feel like climbing Kilimanjaro for a Celtic team that just survived seven smashmouth playoff games against the defending world champs. The shorthanded Celts were forced to go back to work only two days after gutting the Bucks on Causeway Street.

Boston got it done early, taking a 13-point first half lead, but Miami wore down the exhausted Celts at the start of the third with a Jimmy Butler-led, 22-2 run en route to a 118-107 win. Game 2 is Thursday at FTX Arena.

More game recap and some quotes from there.

Eruption

No, not that eruption! Shank's talking about last night's game, an emphatic Celtics Game 5 win over the Miami Heat:

Dream big, Celtics fans. The Green Team has done this before.

The Celtics overcame a 12-point deficit, scored 41 points in the third quarter, and beat the Miami Heat Friday, 121-108, to extend their Eastern Conference finals series to a sixth game. The Celtics are attempting to become the 14th NBA team to crawl out of a 3-1 series deficit.

Sunday will be one of the great sports TV days in Boston history. We’ve got Patriots-Raiders at 1, Tom Brady at 4:25, and Celtics-Heat in Game 6 at 7:30.

Shank “It’s back to basics,” Celtic coach Brad Stevens said after his team’s big second half. “We need to be better again in Game 6.”

This looks like a classic rope-a-dope - write nice things about the local teams when they're winning, then blindside them when they lose. The rest of the column is a stroll down Celtics memory lane and the standard game recap.