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Wednesday, January 20, 2021

Plan Questioned

Like clockwork, Shank bitches about the Boston Red Sox' strategy for the near future:
The president and CEO of the Boston Red Sox admits the Sox are not “all-in” trying to win the World Series this year.

“I think it would be inaccurate to say we are going for it with an all-in approach that perhaps we did prior to the 2018 title,” Sam Kennedy acknowledged in a wide-ranging interview Tuesday.

“We cherish that title, and all of them, but the way we built that team came at a price, which included importantly a depleted farm system and some depleted draft picks along the way. So we are building back up, and as we do this hopefully the right way, we’ll have a chance to be competitive in the American League East in 2021, but also for the longer term.”
This is Shaughnessy in a nutshell - advocate for more free agent spending back in the day, and when that finally runs its course in subsequent years (like last year and this year, in a completely shit sports environment) complain that a) the team sucks and b) they're not doing the big free agency spending spree all over again so the Sox can supposedly win it in 2021.

Some people are just born jagoffs.

Tuesday, January 19, 2021

Who Loves Ya, Baby? - II

In light of Tom Brady making his 14th NFL conference championship game this coming Sunday against the Green Bay Packers, Shank recounts all of them:
Tom Brady is going to Green Bay on Sunday to play in his 14th conference championship game. This will be his first NFC title joust. Brady’s original 13 were played when he was a New England Patriot, and he won nine. Here’s a thumbnail history of Brady’s conference championship games with the Patriots:

2002 at Pittsburgh. W, 24-17. Brady’s first, and the only one he didn’t complete. The Patriots were underdogs on the road, and Brady came out of the game early with a sprained ankle after he was was taken down by Steelers defensive back Lee Flowers.

Drew Bledsoe, who had been The Franchise, threw a touchdown pass to David Patten almost immediately and managed the game the rest of the way.

Saturday, January 16, 2021

DHL Dan CXX - The Long Wait

Shank's latest Picked Up Pieces column is exactly that:
Picked-up pieces while readying to watch 43-year-old Tom Brady return to the site of his first championship when he was 24 years old in 2002 …

▪ Tampa Bay by the Charles Update: The Red Sox wear me out with their inactivity. The trick over on Jersey Street seems to be floating the notion that the Sox are “in on” every free agent and trade possibility … and then doing nothing. This perpetuates the narrative — based on hope more than reality — that they will spend to improve the team.

The Sox were a last-place team in 2012, 2014, and 2015. This feels different. This time they appear content to stay in the basement as support erodes among the loyal fan base.
Funny how Shank spent the past eight months shitting on the team no matter what they did, and now gets to criticize them for sitting on their hands. If only there were a person at the Boston Globe who also owns the red sox that Shank could talk to...

From there it's the usual mix of this and that (the parts about Alabama's bowl win and Doug Pederson's firing from Philadelphia looking like ripoffs of Felger and Mazz themes from Monday & Tuesday), and a good amount of the column's devoted to how many of Tom Brady's playoff games Shank and other people have witnessed in person. Count me out as giving a fuck about that one.

Thursday, January 14, 2021

Who Loves Ya, Baby?

Is Shank trying to pull the wool over our eyes?
Go Browns. Go Cleveland.

These are strange times for New England sports fans. We are coming into the divisional round of the NFL playoffs — wall-to-wall with big games — and the Patriots are not part of the action. We are in search of a team to adopt.

It’s easy for a lot of you, I know. Tom Brady and Rob Gronkowski are with Tampa Bay, and the Buccaneers play the New Orleans Saints in the Superdome Sunday night. It’s the marquee matchup of the weekend, and lots of Patriots fans have adopted the Bucs.

Not me.

I am all about Cleveland. The Browns will be playing the Super Bowl champion Kansas City Chiefs at Arrowhead Stadium Sunday afternoon, and they need my love a lot more than Brady does.
Imagine being anything in need of Shank's love - I'll opt for being fed to hungry Australian sharks. From there the column devolves into boring, Shank-like rote recitals of Cleveland playoff futility and hard luck. Let's not forget, however, a time when Shank wasn't all hugs and kisses for our friends from Ohio, like when he Shanked the whole city of Cleveland nearly six years ago.

Tuesday, January 12, 2021

Better Than '4th And 2'?

Shank's really laying the bullshit on thick with his latest column:
Bill Belichick made a great call on Medal of Freedom decision

President Trump should call Curt Schilling. I’m pretty sure Schill would have no problem showing up in Washington to collect a Presidential Medal of Freedom in the middle of impreachment proceedings, eight days after Trump incited violence against the United States of America.
I challenge anyone out there to point out precisely what President Trump said to incite violence. I've been hearing this line of 'argument' for a week - shouldn't we have plenty specific quotes of violence-inciting rhetoric about this by now?

We haven't, because Trump did not incite violence. Not once.

Given that's the premise of the column, I don't see a need to comment any further, unless you'd like to see Shank take a victory lap of some sort, none of it deserved.

Friday, January 08, 2021

DHL Dan CXIX - Au Contraire

Shank's been a critic of Curt Schilling, to put it mildly. And in another Picked-Up Pieces column, Shank leads off with criticizing Schilling for supporting the 'mostly peaceful' protestors in our nation's capital on Wednesday:
Picked-up pieces while nestling into the couch for the best pro football weekend of the year …

▪ Curt Schilling would help himself if he’d stop spewing hate and claiming he’s being punished by Baseball Hall of Fame voters because of his “politics.” Supporting a racist (really, Shank? - ed) mob that stormed the Capitol is not being “political.” Advocating for lynching journalists, calling Adam Jones a liar when he said he heard racist slurs at Fenway Park, bilking Rhode Island out of $75 million, collecting Nazi memorabilia, and posting anti-transgender material … these are not “political” stands.
Do you think Shank could articulate just what, precisely, was 'racist' about the protestors, aside from them being majority Caucasian? Does that also make Shank, a pasty white Irishman, racist as the dickens? This cheap eight grade name calling, initiated by him in this article and used far and wide by leftists across the land since time immemorial, detracts from the weight of his argument, or it should for most people. I've said before that Schilling has given his opponents plenty of ammunition and he seems to have done so again here. It's much easier to simply point out the massive rank hypocrisy of the Democrats and Shank-type media dorks (by and large the same thing) like this guy does, at least with respect to the local scene.

By the way - I have an English and a German copy of Mein Kampf. Does that mean I collect Nazi memorabilia? Shank wouldn't care unless my last name was Schilling. From there, the rest of the column's okay.

Monday, January 04, 2021

Fine Their Asses!

Shank wasn't happy about last night's game: In fact - he was so pissed off about it he cranked out a column calling for some heads:
NFL should come down on the Eagles for Sunday night’s performance
Maybe they should, but they probably won't.
The Philadelphia Eagles are a disgrace and should be punished by NFL commissioner Roger Goodell.

The Eagles intentionally lost a “Sunday Night Football” game that had massive playoff implications for two other franchises. Philadelphia’s tank job served to improve its draft position from ninth to sixth, so the league should take away that first-round pick. Then fine the owner, suspend coach Doug Pederson, and apologize to all of us for insulting our intelligence and allowing Philly to throw a game.

Remember Deflategate? The Patriots lost their first-round pick, a fourth-rounder, got fined a million bucks, and saw Tom Brady suspended four games just for taking a little air out of the footballs. The Patriots were punished for breaching the integrity of the game. Tampering with the footballs was deemed a competition violation.
Based on that premise, his logic is sound. However, to use Shank's phraseology Deflategate was a bag job of a punishment and doing the same thing here would establish an ability to second guess a coaching decision, which is somewhat defensible were it not for the three pick improvement in draft pick. I'd be on board with that one at least being pushed back to the original slot; maybe taking it away completely would be a useful deterrent for future wannabe tank artists.

The rest of the column's worth reading and it'll be interesting to see what NFL commissioner Goddell does with this hot potato.

And Now For A Slight Change Of Tone

Since it's difficult to rag on a team when they win, Shank wraps up the last game of the New England Patriots' season, a 28 - 14 win over the New Your Jets, and uses a curious word to re-describe the season for the Patriots:
Remember when we thought watching a challenged Patriots team would be fun? Never mind

I really thought the Patriots season was going to be fun. Finally, we would have something different. At long last there was a challenge to win the division. Without Tom Brady, the Pats could not simply roll out the footballs and automatically win the AFC East. They would not be handed another first-round bye. There would be no Tomato Can Home Game in Round 1 of the playoffs. No more tedious palace intrigue involving Bill, Tom, and Bob. No more same-old, same-old.

It was going to be different. Interesting. The thrill of the unknown.

I was wrong. The 2020 Patriot football season was not fun. The Patriots were effectively out of the playoffs in early December and played out the string over the final four games of the season.
Let's just say that, on occasion, Shank likes to rewrite some things. Can you tell from this column or this column if you can detect any notion of Shank thinking the Patriots were going to be a 'fun' team? He describes the first season win (second link) as 'business as usual' for the team, about as far away from 'fun' as you can get. He did enjoy the Seahawks game but that's as close as he ever got on the 'fun' front. He's just full of shit on this point. This is what he's been writing since Week 4:
The local football season was neither interesting nor entertaining. By the time they faced the Dolphins, Bills, and Jets at the finish, the Patriots were just plain bad. They were 2020 Red Sox bad.

Any of you remember the Stupor Bowl at Memorial Stadium back in 1981? That’s when the 2-13 Patriots lost to the 1-14 Baltimore Colts, 23-21, in front of 17,073 fans. The game featured six turnovers, 12 penalties, and attempts by both teams to intentionally lose the game. The Pats finally succumbed when they ran out of timeouts after “driving” to the Colts’ 15-yard line.
Forget the fact that the current Patriots team won a game by two touchdowns; Shank tries to tie them to one of the worst losses in Patriots history and has to go back almost four decades to do it. Other than that, it's a valid comparison!