A Love Affair Is Born

Lookie here - a second consecutive column on A-Rod!

Let’s not call it “great,’’ but this was certainly one of the more memorable moments in the 103-year history of Fenway Park.

On a night when he was benched, Alex Rodriguez, the lightning rod of baseball hatred, walked to home plate as a pinch hitter in the eighth inning and launched a 3-and-0 Junichi Tazawa pitch into the Monster Seats for his 660th career homer, tying Willie Mays for fourth place on baseball’s all-time list. Fans booed Rodriguez on every step around the bases. The Red Sox made no acknowledgment of the milestone on the scoreboard or over the public address system. It was just another homer by some guy named Rodriguez. Yeesh.

Now it’s Bonds, Aaron, Ruth, Mays, and A-Rod. That’s like Ruth, Gehrig, DiMaggio, Mantle, and . . . Costanza.

The most hated Boston sportswriter penning back-to-back smoochers for the most hated man in baseball - makes perfect sense!

The Obligatory A-Rod Column

Alex Rodriguez & the New York Yankees are coming to town this weekend, so we get an A-Rod column from Shank, natch:

Awkward Personified comes to Fenway this weekend.

Alex Rodriguez — the one you’ve despised all these years — makes his return to Boston for a three-game series starting Friday night, and A-Rod has a shot to tie Willie Mays for fourth on the all-time home runs list.

Rodriguez has 659 career homers. Mays hit 660. There are no words to express how wrong this feels.

What do you think, Dr. Charles Steinberg? Are the Red Sox going to feature a video montage of A-Rod’s greatest moments as he rounds the bases to the tune of “Times of Your Life’’ after tying the Say Hey Kid? Perhaps the Sox’ well-known choreographer could produce Terry Cashman singing, “Willie, Mickey and the Duke.’’

And what are Fenway fans to do? Other than boo?

Well, they're in the right ballpark for that!

Shank On A-Rod

Shank posted this column during the latter innings of last night's 6 - 5 marathon win over the Yankees. It's interesting to note that in this column Rodriguez is treated far better than the Red Sox's DH, complete with Shank's new favorite catchphrase:

NEW YORK — Alex Rodriguez is approaching Willie Mays on the all-time home run list and his own team won’t acknowledge this fact.

A-Rod is baseball’s pariah. He is the bubonic plague. Hating on A-Rod is one of America’s favorite parlor games. Even in his own organization.

Rodriguez went 2 for 5 with three strikeouts in Friday night’s Red Sox-Yankees series opener that went deep into the night. It’s weird to see him in uniform again. It’s weird to see him in the Yankee locker room, where he dresses next to Jacoby Ellsbury, a tremendous talent who never gets particularly close to his teammates.

The beloved Yankee stars are all gone. Bernie Williams. Andy Pettitte. Jorge Posada. Mariano Rivera. Finally, Derek Jeter. But A-Rod is back. He is back because the Yankees still owe him a giant bag of money ($61 million through 2017). He is back because he served his one-year suspension. He is back because he’s got nowhere else to go.

Hits and Misses

The CHB today suggests that by hitting Alex Rodriguez last month, the Red Sox might have kicked a hornet's nest: "We might end up looking back at that particular hit by pitch as part of what turned everything around for the Yankees."

Let's ignore that simply getting A-Rod and his .864 OPS back in the Yankees lineup, replacing the automatic outs they had been trotting out to the hot corner all season, is the rational reason.

And while we are at it, let's also ignore how just last April, The CHB had given up both teams for dead.

Hey trees! There's the forest!

Of Whom He Really is Speaking

He has emerged at the most hated man in sports, one of the most hated people in all of America. He is a living, breathing, ballplaying, piñata— the Prince of Loathe.

So in theory The CHB is writing about Alex Rodriguez. But, it's pretty clear he is also writing about himself.