Trouble In Paradise?

With the speculation that new acquisition Alex Bregman might play at third base for the Red Sox, let's see how the current third basement feels about it:

Does Rafael Devers have any interest in becoming the Red Sox’ full-time DH? ‘No!’

FORT MYERS, Fla. — We have a legitimate Red Sox spring training controversy. Just like in the good old days of Roger Clemens and Oil Can Boyd.

The Sox want third baseman Rafael Devers to become a designated hitter to make room for prize free agent acquisition Alex Bregman, who’s been a Gold Glove third baseman for the Astros.

And Devers has one word for them . . .

“No.”

Monday at JetBlue Park was one of the wilder spring training days in club history. That’s no small statement for a franchise that gave us general manager Lou Gorman saying, “The sun will rise, the sun will set, and I’ll have lunch,” when MVP Clemens stormed out of camp over a contract squabble . . . or when Oil Can was nearly arrested for overdue adult videos in Winter Haven — an episode that came to be known as “The Can’s Film Festival.”

I'm sure this one will be as good as some of those other ones but as far as a funny name, nothing's topping “The Can’s Film Festival” !

Alex Bregman's Introductory Press Conference

The newest memeber of the Red Sox held a press conference yesterday, and Shank was there to cover it (with a lot of other reporters):

All smiles at Alex Bregman’s Red Sox introduction, even if the feel-good story has flaws

FORT MYERS, Fla. — Everyone said all the right things Sunday morning at JetBlue Park when the Red Sox finally rolled out their new acquisition, $40 million per year man Alex Bregman.

Side-by-side, the Sox presented Bregman’s agent Scott Boras, Bregman himself, Red Sox chief baseball officer Craig Breslow, manager Alex Cora, and team president/mouthpiece Sam Kennedy.

It was so big that NESN delivered it live to snow-bound New Englanders at 8:30 a.m. (must have killed NESN to cut away from “The Mad Fisherman”).

This was so big a number of Sox stars gathered at the back of the tent to listen to their new teammate/leader (not Rafael Devers, who was seen walking by the group, presumably to get to his car).

This was so big we had actual national baseball reporters from ESPN and USA Today present, a first for a team that has faded from relevance since trading Mookie Betts and pivoting to fiscal responsibility five long years ago.

Emphasis on that last point, as it seems even the national reporters are interested in the team again.

DHL Dan CCXLI - More On The Bregman Trade

A day after the surprise signing of Alex Bregman, Shank takes a deeper dive into its impact on the 2025 Red Sox:

Signing of Alex Bregman shows the good old Red Sox are back, and other thoughts

▪ It’s finally fun to follow the Red Sox again.

Just like that.

Imagine.

Can we all pretend the last five seasons never happened? Can we get John Henry and his FSG friends to pledge they’re Never Going Back to the five post-Mookie seasons that tarnished Boston’s baseball brand and tested loyalties of a fan base that justifiably asks ownership to go all-in every season?

Hope so. Red Sox owners are expected to be at JetBlue Park Monday morning for the annual organization meeting on the day of the team’s first full squad workout. There’s no official word from team public relations, but I am expecting the bosses to take a ceremonial victory lap around the warning track.

Former Sox CEO Larry Lucchino died last spring and has not been running the team for a full decade, but Wednesday night’s news on Bregman kindled memories of the hard-charging boss that cared about winning more than anything. Lucchino also enjoyed lively competition with the “Evil Empire,” and the Sox haven’t been the same since he stepped away.

Now it feels like the Bostons are back, perhaps even equipped to challenge the Yankees again.

It’ll be interesting to see how Alex Cora uses his old pal Bregman, a veteran third baseman. The situation reminds me a little of what happened with the Yankees when they acquired Alex Rodriguez in the spring of 2004 (no one is equating Bregman with A-Rod). The logical positioning would have been to move Derek Jeter to third and have A-Rod play short. But the Yanks didn’t want to embarrass their captain, so Jeter stayed at short and A-Rod took up the new position.

Read on for more analysis this trade has on the other positions for the Olde Towne Team, Bill Belichick, and, well, other thoughts.

A Step In The Right Direction

The Boston Red Sox suddenly got a bit more interesting, haven't they?

In signing Alex Bregman, the Red Sox finally did what they said they would — and it changes everything

FORT MYERS, Fla. — Everything is different now. Red Sox Nation’s long nightmare appears to be over. The Local Nine is back in business, spending money just like the old days and trying to win this year.

Life changed for Sox fans late Wednesday when news broke that Boston signed veteran Houston third baseman Alex Bregman to a three-year, $120 million deal.

After a couple of tight-fisted offseasons peppered with broken promises and faux pledges about “urgency,” this was a move Red Sox fans were waiting for. Bregman is a two-time World Series winner, a legitimate clubhouse leader, and a Fenway Park wrecking ball (.375 lifetime).

Anybody have a recording of the late John Kiley playing the “Hallelujah Chorus” on the Fenway Park organ?

Oh, happy day! Red Sox owner John Henry (who also owns the Globe) once again has paid big bucks for the best available righthanded hitter on the market.

Shank's being nice / non-critical of the his boss, the Red Sox owner? Someome's annual review must be right around the corner...

Red Sox Report - Roman Anthony

He's only been down there a few days and it's silly season already:

Roman Anthony has rocketed through the Red Sox farm system. Are the major leagues the next stop?

FORT MYERS, Fla. — Even his name is perfect.

Roman Anthony.

How can a kid miss with a name like that?

It rolls off the tongue and onto your scorecard like Mickey Mantle, Willie Mays, Clint Hurdle, Bombo Rivera, Oil Can Boyd or Roy Hobbs.

The name is regal. Almost fictional. Too good to be true.

Just like the young Red Sox outfielder himself. Twenty-year-old Red Sox phenom Roman Anthony.

Welcome to Boston baseball’s spring training, 2025, where the frugal, suddenly middle-market Red Sox sell the future instead of their dismal, recent past. After some jackpot years picking high in the draft (finishing in last place has its benefits) fruits of Boston’s farm system are maturing and JetBluePark fans this spring will feast on a regular diet of 22-year-old second baseman Kristian Campbell, 22-year-old shortstop Marcelo Mayer, and last year’s No. 1-ranked prospect in all of baseball, Roman Anthony.

I think it's way too early for Shank to compare this kid to names like that, but we'll see.

Live, From Fort Myers

I think I know one reason why Shank goes to nearly every Red Sox spring training:

Spring training is here. Did Craig Breslow follow through on the Red Sox' offseason promises to fans?

FORT MYERS, Fla. — Forty-four-year-old Craig Breslow, the chief baseball officer of the Red Sox, may be the smartest man in baseball.

Here’s what it says about him in the Red Sox media guide:

“Breslow graduated in 2002 from Yale University with a degree in molecular biophysics and biochemistry. He was named the ‘Smartest Man in Baseball’ by the Wall Street Journal in 2009, and in 2010 he ranked No. 1 on The Sporting News list of ‘Top 20 Smartest Athletes.‘ ”

Boston’s baseball boss has fortified his cerebral image with some spellbinding statements in his 18 months on the job. My personal favorite came when the Sox were struggling last summer — playing defense like guys wearing shoes on their hands — and Breslow told the Globe’s Alex Speier: “We have been poor clusterers or sequencers of performance.”

Spring traqining = no snow shoveling!

DHL Dan CCXL - Threat Level Reduced

Super Bowl 59 (or LIX for you fellow Roman Numeral dorks) is on the horizon, Shank says 'fear not, Patriots fans':

No matter what happens on Sunday, the Chiefs are no threat to the Patriots’ dynasty, and other thoughts

Picked-up pieces while at Star Market buying a Super Bowl sheet cake with tiny goal posts . . .

▪ Don’t be threatened, Patriots fans. The Kansas City Chiefs pose no threat to the greatest dynasty in the history of the NFL.

The Chiefs are slight favorites to win their third consecutive Super Bowl Sunday in New Orleans against the Eagles. Not surprisingly, a portion of paranoid and ever-defensive Pats fans (folks still talking about the ideal gas law and “The Wells Report In Context”) fear that a Kansas City victory will somehow tarnish the legacy of the Bill Belichick-Tom Brady Patriots.

Fear not, you footie-pajama-wearing Pats fans.

Taylor Swift or no Taylor Swift, the Chiefs aren’t going to top the Patriots.

Andy Reid will never be better than Bill.

Travis Kelce will never be better than Gronk.

And Patrick Mahomes will never be better than Tom.

It’s all about the numbers.

Keep On Truckin'

As the Boston Red Sox continue to be a team hovering around the .500 line, Shank sees it carry over into something that used to be news worthy:

Much like the Red Sox, Truck Day just isn’t what it used to be

The man was elderly. Older than me, even. He’d emerged from one of the Fenway Park gates on Van Ness Street and as he approached, he asked, “Is this really an event worth covering?”

I chuckled and said something about tradition. When he passed, I turned around and noticed the stenciling on the back of his red windbreaker.

“Red Sox Tours,” it read.

Yeesh. Even team employees know that the expiration date on Red Sox Truck Day has come and gone.

And yet, we soldiered on — myself and several dozen Red Sox diehards — on a balmy February day as the Sox equipment truck was loaded with 20,400 baseballs, 1,100 bats, 200 batting gloves, 200 batting helmets, 320 batting practice tops, 160 white game jerseys, plus family cribs and bikes, and a couple million sunflower seeds that will be needed for eight weeks of spring training in Fort Myers, Fla.

DHL Dan CCXXXIX - All Hail The King!

What is this? A Boston Globe writer, jumping on the Trump Train?

If elected King of Sports, here are my Day 1 decrees, and other thoughts

Picked-up pieces while wondering what the crowd’s going to look like for Monday’s Truck Day festival at Fenway . . .

▪ Pardons and executive orders are all the rage in these early days of 2025. In this spirit, I am here to tell you what I’ll do when elected King of Sports.

On my first day as King of Sports I’ll call the media to my Ovaltine Office — I drink the delicious malt every day — and wave my pen as a ceremonial sword, righting all wrongs and making sports great again.

This revolution of sports common sense no doubt will be controversial, but it’s necessary. We’re going to take our sports back.

Henceforth, I decree:

▪ All postseason baseball games will be played in the afternoon.

▪ From this day forward, there will be only two ways to score points in basketball: Free throws and 2-point field goals. I am eliminating the 3-point shot. End of story.

▪ No more offside in hockey or soccer. Let’s open up these games.

▪ No more analytics departments. The reliance on analytics in sports ends.

▪ No more corruption-ridden “extra time” in soccer. There will be a clock that winds down to 0:00, just like in football, basketball, and hockey.

▪ NFL kickoffs will go back to the good old days when men were men.

▪ The Calipari statue comes down in Amherst.

Is power dangerous in the wrong hands? Just asking!

DHL Dan CCXXXVIII - What Might Have Been

Shank's wondering whether a late season win by the New England Patriots might've shaken up the draft board:

If not for a late-season win in 2023, the Patriots may have drafted playoff hero Jayden Daniels, and other thoughts

Picked-up pieces while praying the pipes don’t freeze …

▪ Three questions on this cold conference championship weekend:

1. Did Bill Belichick and Bailey Zappe inadvertently crush the Patriots on the way out the door when New England beat Denver on Christmas Eve 2023?

2. Had the Patriots drafted second instead of third last spring, would they have selected Drake Maye over Jayden Daniels?

3. At this hour, would Patriots fans rather have Daniels than Maye?

The performance of Daniels in these playoffs coupled with the nonstop news spilling out of Foxborough has me wondering how we’re going to be feeling 15-20 years from now when the dossiers of Daniels and Maye are complete.

Maye certainly made a strong showing in his limited time as New England’s starting quarterback in 2024. Surrounded by the worst roster in the NFL, he demonstrated good pocket poise, completed 67 percent of his passes, and averaged 7.8 yards when he ran. He didn’t start until Week 6 in Houston, and wound up throwing 15 touchdown passes with 10 interceptions while being sacked 34 times.

Comparison Made

Leading up to the Super Bowl gives us many columns about one or both teams that'll be playing next Sunday night. Shank sets his sights on the Kansas City Chiefs and makes a comparison of them with... the New England Patriots!

These Chiefs will never be the Patriots, but it’s time for New England to embrace their modern-day dominance

Don’t fight it any longer, New England.

It’s time to adopt the Kansas City Chiefs.

They are you as you are they and you are me and we are all together. Kansas City’s coach, Andy Reid, is “The Walrus.”

There’s a lot of regional and national negativity directed at the Chiefs. Fans outside of Kansas City largely hate them. They win too much. They are always programmed in coveted prime-time slots. They get all the calls from the officials. They have an ever-clutch quarterback who’s constantly on TV selling us something. They are invariably lucky.

Sound like any team you loved from 2001-19?

Face it, Pats fans. Aside from the cheating and the paranoia, today’s Kansas City Chiefs are your New England Patriots in the first 18 years of this century.

DHL Dan CCXXXVII - Staying In The Past

Kind of sensing a theme with these last two columns...

It’s still weird, five seasons post-Brady, to be on the outside looking in during NFL playoffs, and other thoughts

Picked-up pieces while reminding myself that nobody knows anything when it comes to betting on the NFL playoffs …

▪ Five seasons into our post-Brady world, it’s still weird to be on the outside looking in during the NFL’s biggest weekends of the year.

I still have flashbacks of walking across the sprawling acres surrounding Arrowhead Stadium en route to the AFC Championship game in January 2019. Eyeballing thousands of festive/frozen Heartland fans, many barbecuing ribs and blissfully boasting about how they were going to beat the Patriots, I remember thinking, “Poor dopes and losers. These people have no idea what they’re in for. They think they’re Super Bowl-bound, but they don’t stand a chance. Something hideous will happen to their team at the end of this game and the Pats will prevail.”

Sure enough, that’s how it went. What appeared to be a game-losing Tom Brady interception in the final minute of regulation was negated because Chiefs pass rusher Dee Ford lined up offside. Ford’s transgression had no bearing on the turnover, but it gave the Patriots the ball back. Naturally, Brady tied the game, then won it in overtime when … you guessed it … the Chiefs lost the coin flip and never touched the football.

Read on for unsurprising digs at - you guessed it - Robert Kraft. Talk about never letting go!

Where Past Is Prologue

Shank has a few thoughts about the New England Patriots new head coach, and dates himself in the process:

Mike Vrabel is another former Patriot, but now they need to let go of the past and let him truly run the show

I love the past and am not an agent of change.

Just like the Patriots.

I have a land line in my 125-year-old house. Also a VCR, CD player, Rolodex, and weekly calendar where I scribble appointments and to-do lists. I have never Tik-Toked, still carry cash, and own shoes older than Globe Patriots beat reporter Nicole Yang.

I read printed newspapers, seven per day, and Monday those ink-stained rags featured these headlines:

“No surprise, Patriots turn to their past and hire Vrabel as next head coach,” The New York Post

“Vrabel is Returning to New England as Patriots Head Coach,” The New York Times

“Glory daze,” The Boston Globe

Beautiful. The Patriots love the past. They can’t let it go. They love anything and everything that reminds them of their great triumphs in the first two decades of this century.

The Patriots aren't the only ones that can't let things go...

DHL Dan CCXXXVI - On To The Offseason

Shank's weekly column features an unusual admission:

The real season — the offseason — is finally here for the Patriots, and other thoughts

Picked-up pieces while crediting Bob Kraft for having the smarts and fortitude to take questions from the media when there’s a lot to explain about his team . . .

▪ Mid-winter has emerged as the most important season for the Patriots.

For the first 20 years of this century, New England football’s January/February was about Saturday night home playoff games, Tuck Rules, snow angels, Tom Brady comebacks, Lombardi Trophies, cheating scandals, paths to perfection, revenge tours, sore losers in Pittsburgh and Indianapolis, Mona Lisa Vito, “Malcolm, go!,” 28-3, and The Continuing Story of Bill and Ernie.

All of that is gone, but these freezing, post-holiday weeks with no playoffs for us still represent the most important stretch of the season.

In 2025, the Patriots are annual NFL losers. Those 13 regular-season losses and four feeble wins mean just about nothing. Almost all the games were tedious and unmemorable.

Sincere praise for Kraft or a huge head fake by Shank? You make the call!

If You're Not First, You're Last

Here's Shank on the firing of New England Patriots head coach Jerod Mayo:

In Jerod Mayo’s case, nice guys really do finish last

Weep not for nice guy Jerod Mayo. This wasn’t his fault.

Smart, sensible, stoic, Mayo will be a coveted commodity for many decades as an NFL assistant coach, commentator, or just about anything he pursues. He may become an NFL head coach again, perhaps a good one. He is only 38 and it’s all ahead of him.

Mayo was fired as head coach of the Patriots, less than two hours after the hapless Patriots beat the playoff-bound Buffalo Bills, 23-16, in New England’s season-finale “Stupor Bowl” at Gillette Stadium Sunday afternoon.

It was a “win” that cost the Patriots dearly, dropping them from first to fourth in the NFL’s annual April meat market. The hollow victory supplied the perfect coda for Mayo’s disastrous single season as Patriot head coach:

The 2024 Patriots: even when they win, they lose.

It’s fair to state that Mayo’s disastrous one-year reign was an ownership blunder, residue of Bob Kraft’s considerable hubris and pain from the final years of Bill Belichick’s quarter-century at the helm. Mayo should never have been handed the job in the first place and likely was promoted out of sheer loyalty to the boss. After 25 years of perceived disrespect from Belichick, Kraft wanted a head coach who was polite and beholden to the boss. The result was abysmal. Mayo was wildly inexperienced and unprepared for the lofty position.

Another Patriots column for which the real primary target is Bob Kraft.

Losing By Winning

If it weren't for the fact there's always a losing team, Shank would have nothing to write about.

One of the best comments ever at Dan Shaughnessy Watch, and the theme of Shank's second column from Sunday:

Patriots lose big (No. 1 NFL Draft pick), even in victory

Say it loud and say it proud. Print bumper stickers and T-shirts.

The 2024 Jerod Mayo Patriots: Even when they win, they lose.

Through the decades, we’ve seen some unforgettable teams here in Greater Boston.

The 1967 Red Sox were the “Cardiac Kids,” who forged “The Impossible Dream.” Our Causeway Street skaters of the 1970s were the Big Bad Bruins, who later ceded to “The Lunchpail A.C.” We had the “Cowboy Up” Red Sox of 2003, and the Curse-bustin “Why Not Us?” Sox of ‘04. Kevin Garnett led the “Ubuntu” Celtics to the NBA Championship in 2008.

Now we have the ‘24 Patriots who gave us a 17-game clown show festooned with turnovers, pre-snap penalties, and embarrassing losses from September though the holidays. Going into Sunday’s season finale, their 3-13 record put them in dandy position for the No. 1 pick in the entire NFL draft. All they had to do to secure the top spot was lose to a 13-3, playoff-bound Buffalo Bills team.

DHL Dan CCXXXV - The Axe Falleth?

Just an hour before Patriots head coach Jerod Mayo became former Patriots head coach Jerod Mayo, Shank was thinking ownership will do nothing:

The Patriots need to do right by their fans and fire Jerod Mayo, and other thoughts

Picked-up pieces while wondering if Route 1 will be easy to navigate Sunday . . .

▪ Welcome to the Stupor Bowl. Sunday in Foxborough we get the 13-3 Buffalo Bills, a playoff-bound team with absolutely nothing to gain against a 3-13 Patriots team that has much to lose by winning.

Ugh. Wake me when it’s over.

When this finale mercifully concludes, Bob and Jonathan Kraft — visible this season only when network pals featured them rattling jewelry from a cozy midfield suite — need to do right by fans and fix their mess of a football team.

Regrettably, I can pretty much guess how this is going to go: Bob will send out his now-annual letter of apology, telling fans they deserve better and promising a better product. The Krafts will feebly fire a coordinator or two, Bob will reluctantly take a few questions, and announce that Jonathan is busy elsewhere at a very important corrugated cardboard meeting.

I'm getting the feeling Shank doesn't like the Kraft family a whole lot...

Time To Catch Up?

Sorry, folks - took a bit of a break from Shank, as we all need to do from time to time...

Let's start from a few weeks ago, when Shank correctly pointts out the half-assed effort by the Red Sox to go after free agents again this offseason:

Red Sox have struck out on big-name talent, but they rule one aspect of free agency: They’re kings of interest

Last winter, Red Sox chairman Tom Werner gave us a punchline for the ages when he pledged that the Sox would go “full throttle” after their last-place finish of 2023.

We all know how that worked out. The Sox were a virtual Paul Cézanne still life in the winter of 2023-24, unless you want to count trading 2024 Cy Young winner Chris Sale to the Braves for a bin of rosin bags, and signing Lucas Giolito, who got hurt in Fort Myers and didn’t throw a pitch all season.

This winter is different. Sort of.

The Sox have indeed added some name players (Aroldis Chapman, Walker Buehler, Garrett Crochet), but they’re still tire-kickers on the free agent market, ever MLB’s “Kings of Interest,” and no longer serious players for big-name talents seeking multiyear deals.