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Monday, June 04, 2018

Shank Goes Into Colonel Jessup Mode Again

"You want answers?"

"I want the truth!"

Shank's a self-righteous little prick, isn't he?
Dear Tom,

What happened?

Or, as Richard Sherman once asked . . . you mad, bro?

Seriously. At what point, precisely, did you decide you like the world of Thurston Howell III more than the football world of Fuzzy Thurston? When did you make the leap from stopwatches to TAG Heuer watches? How can you possibly feel underappreciated when you work here in New England, where every sports citizen wants to throw rose petals in your path, then wash your feet and kiss your five championship rings?
I can barely stomach the rest of the column, as Shank makes it as much about himself as he does about Tom Brady, hiding behind the occasional royal 'we' to water down that angle of it.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

A timely Thurston Howell III reference will get the kids buying the Globe again. What can't the visionary publisher that is Mrs. John W. Henry do?

Anonymous said...

Only Bob Ryan can outdo Shank with his "James Busch Chatsworth Osborne Orth­wein" mentions. Dobie Gillis was the show previous to Gilligan's Island.

Jason said...

Well shank is a man of the people and this fool has said it himself.