Thursday, December 18, 2008

Lazy, Thy Name is Dan Shaughnessy

Dan must read Deadspin, or any other number of websites that aggregate sports news. When will he learn that his picked up pieces bit is a dinosaur in the internet age.

If he's not mentioning something that has been all over the internet, he is writing drivel like this:

Nice day for Newton North basketball alums last Saturday. Corey Lowe (now a 1,000-point scorer) went for 19 in Boston University's narrow loss to 12th-ranked Notre Dame, while Anthony Gurley played 27 minutes and scored 5 points in UMass's upset of defending national champion Kansas. Lex Mongo is also on the UMass roster. Lowe, Gurley, and Mongo were teammates on the North squad that won back-to-back state championships (53-1) in 2005 and '06...

Word games: The Patriots have Jarvis Green, and BenJarvus Green-Ellis. The Bruins sometimes have Johnny Boychuk. Boychuk's last name is an anagram for Oh Bucyk. So, he's Johnny Oh Bucyk.

EDIT: And I forgot the unwarranted attack on Bob Kraft:

Patriots in London next October? New England in Olde England? What a ghastly idea. Wonder if Oxford has a lightweight football team.


Anonymous said...

The word game crap was beyond embarassing.

I mean, all Shank writing is the definition of filler, but that took it to new unplumbed depths.

Anonymous said...

and the ObjectiveShankLover says, "Fantastic column by Dano! and much needed too!"

Anonymous said...


Please tell me that you too are getting bored with the Shank’s "stream of consciousness" shtick.

“A Million Pieces”, wasn’t that the farcical story about rehabilitation?

Isn’t it time the Shank entered a reality treatment center? The Shank seems lost.


Anonymous said...

I thought Dan's last paragraph could be revised a little bit and actually be pretty telling...

Pay no attention to anything Dan Shaughnessy says. Ever. Dan was a great writer at one time (though he hated to do research and is lazy) and he has an electric afro, but is perhaps the biggest fraud of his generation.

Chris said...

Thoughts while watching Jay Mariotti on ESPN pontificate with a constant sneer and scowl: Has this guy EVER had a relationship with ANYONE? Who could POSSIBLY stand this J.O. for any amount of time...never mind trying to manage a relationship with him. Shaughnessy is a semi-kinder and semi-gentler version of Jay Mariotti, and both are the 'bitter clingers' from the dinosaur age of sports media hacks.

mike_b1 said...

Except that for all his character flaws, Mariotti was once known as an exceptionally hard worker, not for hanging out in the bar or hotel lounge.