Smoke And Mirrors

Never one to let a bad New England Patriots loss go to waste, Shank laments the end of a situation he cheerleaded for three weeks, complete with lame nostalgia, a Jethro Tull lyric mention (feel free to guess which one!) and baseball cross-references:

After Patriots’ defeat, it is easy to see the magic show was just smoke and mirrors

For a couple of minutes in the second quarter, it was Zappe Magic and almost felt like 21 years ago when young Tom Brady came out of nowhere and took the quarterback job from Drew Bledsoe.

In the first half of the prime-time “Monday Night Football” game against the Bears, Mac Jones was Wally Pipped by Bailey Zappe’s Lou Gehrig (Zappe even wears No. 4). Zappe was Elvis. He was Rudy — with talent. The fourth-round pick from Western Kentucky came off the bench and directed two TD drives in less than four minutes, rocking Gillette to its foundation, and taking the Patriots from a 10-0 deficit to a 14-10 lead. The golly-gee kid completed 4 of 4 passes for 97 yards. He threw a 30-yard touchdown pass to Jakobi Meyers and a 43-yard bomb to DeVante Parker.

Despite preposterous insistence that the Pats were planning to play two quarterbacks regardless of performance (lie detector machines exploding from Portland to Newport), our local quarterback controversy was in full (not Chaim) Bloom when Jones failed and Zappe succeeded in the first half. In that moment, Zappe officially supplanted last year’s Pro Bowl/playoff rookie, Jones, who came to New England as a first-round QB savior. It looked like the Pats would move to 4-3 and take Zappe Magic into the Meadowlands against the hated Jets this weekend.

Zappe Fever?

Let's start off the week with some more Bailey Zappe, shall we?

Get ready for another week of debating Bailey Zappe vs. Mac Jones after Patriots rout Browns

CLEVELAND — The only question now is “How come Bailey Zappe wasn’t invited to Bob Kraft’s wedding?”

I mean, who needs Elton John, Drew Bledsoe, and Tom Brady when you’ve got the star power of Bailey Zappe working for you?

Zappe Fever is about to go viral. Bailey Zappe is ready to break the Internet. The kid quarterback is hotter than Wordle. He had a better game in Cleveland Sunday than Kraft-wedding-guest Brady had in Pittsburgh.

OK, I’m exaggerating a little. Zappe may not be the Next Big Thing. He may just be a placeholder until Mac Jones’s high ankle sprain heals. But New England’s fourth-round, third-string rookie completed 24 of 34 passes for 309 yards, threw two touchdowns, and had no interceptions in a 38-15 win over the Browns at FirstEnergy Stadium Sunday.

A Slight Overreaction

The New England Patriots shut out the Detroit Lions on Sunday, 29 - 0. Look who's doing cartwheels over the third-string quarterback:

Rookie Bailey Zappe is undefeated as a starter, so where does that leave the Patriots’ quarterback situation?

OK, strap yourselves in.

Here we go.

Zappe Fever Grips Hub. Zappe Days Are Here Again. Zappe Hour at Gillette. Don’t Worry, be Zappy.

Suddenly, Mac Jones is on notice. Mac Jones is Wally Pipp and Zappe is Lou Gehrig. Mac is Drew Bledsoe and Bailey Zappe is (gulp) Tom Brady.

We have what Bill Belichick hates the most: a fabricated quarterback controversy. I mean, we all know you’re not supposed to lose your job to an injury, but Zappe is undefeated as a starting quarterback in the NFL. How can Bill move him out of the position? And who cares if he looks like Ollie from “Hoosiers”? (Thanks, Rochie.)

Fairy Tale Column

Given Shank's history with writing nasty columns about the New England Patriots after a loss, this one's a pleasant surprise:

Bailey Zappe’s fairy-tale debut had all the makings of a winning show for the Patriots, until the end

Aaron Rodgers vs. Bailey Zappe (which rhymes with “happy’').

A four-time NFL MVP vs. a fourth-round draft pick who’d never played a down of professional football?

A Super Bowl champion against a third-string rookie who made his last meaningful pass against Appalachian State in the vaunted Boca Raton Bowl?

A “Jeopardy!” host with 29 career game-winning drives against a 23-year-old who was playing at Houston Baptist two years ago?

It was a true Cinderella story, ‘til Zappe turned into a pumpkin ‘neath the cover of October skies. The undermanned Patriots pushed the Packers into overtime, but Rodgers finally stepped up and the Packers beat the Pats, 27-24, on a 31-yard walkoff field goal by Mason Crosby.