DHL Dan CCXLIX - It Don't Come Easy

In thi week's Picked up Pieces column, Shank weighs in on the 2024 - 2025 Boston Celtics and their chances of repeat championships:

Since the dynasty of the ’60s many Celtics teams have failed to repeat, so this won’t be easy, and other thoughts

Picked-up pieces while wondering if DOGE recruited its staffers from Driveline …

Your 2024-25 Boston Celtics are hoping to win back-to-back NBA championships.

Larry Bird, Robert Parish, and Kevin McHale never did it. Kevin Garnett, Paul Pierce, and Ray Allen couldn’t do it. Dave Cowens and Jo Jo White couldn’t get it done, either.

No. The only Celtics teams to win consecutive championships were the Bill Russell-led teams of the 1960s.

And they did it a lot.

Put it this way: When I walked into first grade at Groton Elementary School in September 1959, the Boston Celtics were defending NBA champs.

Bailing Out Early

The 2025 Boston Red Sox are off to a rough start of the season. Here's Shank taking a dump on them:

Recovery helps, but I was expecting so much more from these Red Sox, and they’ve been frustratingly bad so far

Feeling any better about these Red Sox?

After beating the Rays, 1-0, Wednesday night, the Sox come home this weekend to play the White Sox four times. As bad as they’ve been (losses of 11-1 and 16-1 since Friday), your Red Sox could be in first place by the time the Marathon starts Monday morning.

I had faith in them this year. After ripping the Sox for five seasons, I took the cheese. Spent nine days in Fort Myers, Fla., madly applauded the Alex Bregman signing, felt good about ownership getting back in the winning business, and picked these goofy guys to finish in first place in the American League East.

After five years of abject neglect, I was convinced that Boston’s absentee owners were back in the hard-chargin’, Lucchino-driven, contest-living that was the trademark of the first decade of John Henry and the vaunted Fenway Sports Group.

DHL Dan CCXLVIII - Joined At The Hip

That would be Shank and former New England Patriots head coach Bill Belichick, and their apprarent shared disdain for Patriots owner Robert Kraft:

Bill Belichick shows no love for Patriots owner Robert Kraft in new book, and other thoughts

Picked-up pieces while wondering if anybody else is worried about Jaylen Brown’s knee . . .

⋅ Bill Belichick’s new book, “The Art of Winning,” arrived in the mail this past week and I could not wait to pore through it.

Imagine. Two hundred and eighty-nine pages of Bill telling us about the secret sauce of 24 seasons at the helm in Foxborough. I couldn’t wait to read what he really thinks of Bob Kraft and how he’d explain Malcolm Butler not playing in the February 2018 Super Bowl against the Eagles in Minneapolis.

Sorry, it’s not in there.

As an author of many books, I’d estimate this one’s about 80,000 words.

Two words not in the book: Robert Kraft.

OK, this is somewhat predictable, I guess. The obvious snub is yet another demonstration that things often end badly here on the Boston sports scene.

That's right, and sometimes Shank helps out to make that happen.

DHL Dan CCXLVII - Break Out The Bell Bottoms

That's right, folks - let's take a trip back to the disco era!

Red Sox turning back time to the memorable 1975 season and the best World Series ever, and other thoughts

Picked-up pieces while thinking about the magical Red Sox summer of 1975 …

It forever ranks with the most unforgettable seasons in New England sports lore, sculpting memories that still reside in the minds of Boston baseball’s greatest generation.

Aging Boomers who prayed at the altar of Ted, celebrated the Impossible Dream, and made it to the Promised Land in 2004, have fond recollections of the summer of ‘75 and the greatest World Series ever played.

Early Friday afternoon, before the Red Sox’ 13-9 win over the Cardinals, those gods of ’75 gathered at Fenway for the Red Sox home opener. It was a day to celebrate the Man We Call Yaz, Dewey, Rico, Gold Dust Twins Jim Rice and Freddie Lynn, Hall of Fame catcher Carlton Fisk, and the late, great Luis Tiant, who controlled Sox Nation’s hearts and tears all those years ago.

Back in the day, they wore two-toned, red-and-blue caps and won 95 regular-season games. They swept the three-time defending Series champion A’s in the ALCS, then took the 108-win, Big Red Machine to a seventh game in a Series that temporarily rescued baseball. In a hot Boston summer pepped with busing-stoked racial tension, the colorful and talented Sox gave us daily thrills and a common cause.

Check out the picture - jerry Remy with the porn moustache!

Assume The Position

With the first serious losing streak for the 2025 Boston Red Sox, you can count on Shank to write a column about it:

After just one series, Red Sox find themselves in a familiar position

ARLINGTON, Texas — The Red Sox are in sole possession of last place in the American League East.

Imagine.

After the legit full-throttle winter which saw newly-urgent ownership open the vault and Craig Bres-Lowball trading prospects and handing out one-year contracts like candy . . . after the earth-shattering acquisition of veteran leader/winner/Fenway wrecking ball Alex Bregman . . . after newfound love from pundits across Baseball America (some see the Red Sox playing in the 2025 World Series!) . . . the Sox are back where they’ve lived for much of the post-Mookie era:

Sole possession of last place in the American League East.

Admittedly, this is knee-jerk nonsense, wild hyperbole, and social-media-level overreaction.

Exactly what Shank has made a career out of doing.

Striking Out

Let's see how (former) Red Sox third baseman Rafael Devers is doing in his new role as designated hitter after three games:

Something’s amiss in Rafael Devers’s move to DH

ARLINGTON, Texas — The Rafael Devers DH project is not off to a great start in Texas. In three games, Devers is 0 for 12 with 10 strikeouts. That’s an MLB record. Seriously.

In the galaxy of Boston sports stars, Devers has never been a controversial figure. In seven-plus seasons, he’s been a sweet, silent, savant swinger who smiles and keeps to himself. His nickname is “Carita,” which translates to “Baby Face.”

See the ball. Hit the ball. Mind your own business. Show up tomorrow and do it again. That’s been the Raffy Devers Way.

All that changed when Devers signed a 10-year, $313.5 million contract, in the post-Mookie, post-Xander chaos that took the franchise to the bottom of the AL East in 2022 and 2023. The big money brought new attention and responsibilities, and Sox Nation came down hard on Devers last month when he balked at the notion of moving to DH to accommodate new Sox third baseman, Gold Glover Alex Bregman.

Opening Days

Shank takes a trip to Texas to cover the 2025 Boston Red Sox's opening series against the Texas Rangers, winning the first game on a 9th inning home run by Wilyer Abreu, and Shank devoting an entire column to Kristian Campbell's first hit in the major leagues, which may or may not be ruled an error after the Rangers challenged the call.

Petty things - right up Shank's alley...

DHL Dan CCXLVI - Change Of The Guard

The Boston Celtics were sold on Thursday for $6.2 billion dollars, a record for a professional franchise in the United States. Shank, of course, has a few questions about the deal:

Why not Pags? It seems odd that Steve Pagliuca’s Celtics ownership bid was turned down, and other thoughts.

Picked-up pieces while doing the math on a $360 million investment that turned into $6.1 billion . . .

⋅ Why not Pags?

This is the takeaway after Thursday morning’s news bomb, fan agita, official corporate statements, and private equity high-fiving that went on after the Globe’s Adam Himmelsbach broke the story that the Celtics have been sold to an investor group led by complete unknown William Chisholm — a North Shore native who went to Dartmouth and has pledged to “work to bring more championships home to Boston.”

Swell.

So here’s just one little question?

“Why not Pags?” I followed. “Seems to check all the boxes and would make fans super comfortable.”

“Our goal was always to take the best bid from a suitable buyer, and that’s what we did,” responded Irv Grousbeck.

So, there you go. The Chisholm group made the best offer, according to Irv Grousbeck.

And that’s that.

But this isn't as straightforward as it seems:

Pagliuca issued a statement shortly after it was learned he didn’t get the team early Thursday, stating, in part, “We made a fully guaranteed and financed offer at a record price . . . We had no debt or private-equity money that would potentially hamstring our ability to compete in the future. We have felt it was the best offer for the Celtics . . . ”

The Grousbecks did not feel that way.

The Globe has learned that the Chisholm bid was higher than Pagliuca’s.

Not seeing the offer sheets, and not knowing which package had more guaranteed financing, it’s impossible to measure the offers. That is what the Grousbecks do.

Also contributing to the muddy waters - it's not much of a secret Steve Pagliuca and Wyc Grousbeck aren't friends, to put it mildly. I think that's playing a big part in this one.

March Blandness

It seems like Shank's off the NCAA Tournament bandwagon, and maybe with good reason:

The men’s NCAA tournament used to be great. But now that it’s professional basketball? No thanks.

March Madness! How’s your bracket looking? Got tickets to the big subregional in Providence this coming weekend? Do you think Rick Pitino and Coach Cal could match up on Saturday? Is Cooper Flagg better than Bill Walton? How about that Dan Hurley, huh? Think we’ll see a No. 16 beat a No. 1? Do you hate Duke?

Sweet 16 . . . Elite Eight . . . Final Four . . . Whee!

No thanks, Basketball America. I’ll be sitting this one out. I’m not sure I’d watch the men’s championship game if they played it in my driveway on Monday, April 7.

Seriously. The NCAA men’s basketball tournament used to be great, but I have a hard time understanding how folks invest dollars and emotions in today’s farce that has almost nothing to do with colleges and universities.

“With the Power Four conferences, it’s fraud in terms of terminology,” says Leo Papile, former player personnel director of the Celtics (14 seasons) and presently a senior adviser with the Clippers who founded the Boston Athletic Basketball Club (BABC) 48 years ago. “They use the term ‘student-athletes.’ That’s fraud. If you brought that to trial, it would be very easy to prove that that does not exist. I’m not a scholar, but I know that in order to get a degree, you can’t bounce around three or four schools in four years.”

True that. Not that anyone cares anymore, but when we watch the big schools in this tournament, it’s impossible to buy the notion that we are watching students at play. Oregon traveled more than 26,000 miles to play its Big Ten schedule — yes, Oregon is in the Big Ten — this season. That’s more than the circumference of the Earth. Think those kids are cracking the books or interacting with their schoolmates?

Today’s NCAA basketball is unregulated professional basketball. Frothy fans boost their favorite school, screaming their heads off for skilled professional players, most of whom have zero allegiance to said college, and some of whom maybe never set foot in a classroom or interacted with anyone on campus outside of the athletic department and compliance office.

I largely agree with this, because it is really stupid having a West Coast college like Oregon in the Big Ten (Stanford's also in the Big Ten, or maybe it's the Big Sixteen now) and the NIL money's why all this is happening.

DHL Dan CCXLV - It's Anyone's Race

With a week or so to go until Opening Day, Shank takes a peek at the Red Sox and the rest of the American League East division:

Suddenly, the AL East is wide open, so now’s the time for the Red Sox to get it together, and other thoughts

Picked-up pieces while waiting for this weekend’s Massachusetts high school state hockey and basketball finals . . .

⋅ We are two weeks away from the start of the baseball season and the American League East is suddenly wide open. The reigning division king Yankees are reeling and all five teams think they have a chance.

It’s been awhile since I could seriously consider picking the Red Sox to finish first, but after the winter acquisitions of Garrett Crochet and Walker Buehler, and the stunning signing of Alex Bregman, I was ready to go Full Rochie and pick the Sox to win the division.

And yet . . . the Sox are stalled in Fort Myers. Spring training stats don’t count for much, but the Red Sox seem to have set a record for most players showing up in camp already injured (Rafael Devers, Brayan Bello, Kutter Crawford, Lucas Giolito) or sick (Wilyer Abreu, Triston Casas). Meanwhile, Trevor Story has new back issues, the team has no closer, no second baseman, suspect defense, and zero catching depth. Sound like division winners to you?

Disrespected

Some analyst dweeb gave Red Sox legend Jim Rice a hard time at spring training last week:

Red Sox staffer’s disrespect of Hall of Famer Jim Rice is unacceptable … yet accepted in today’s MLB

... I was reminded of all this when I read Sunday’s Globe and learned that one of the Sox army corps of baseball engineers interrupted a casual batting cage conversation between Jim Rice and a prospect, who’d solicited some batting tips from the former American League MVP. The Sox staffer asked Rice to back away from the kid hitter.

According to Rice, the spreadsheet staffer’s message to the Hall of Famer was something to the effect of, Mi>“Please leave our young hitter alone. That’s not the way we teach hitting here. We know better. We want to hit the ball in the air and hit it hard.”

Rice said he asked the uniformed staffer if he’d played and was told no.

DHL Dan CCXLIV - Pete Rose In The Hall Of Fame?

In this week's (or last week's, based on the delay in posting) Picked Up Pieces column, Shank talks about the possibilities:

Has a post from President Trump given Pete Rose’s Hall of Fame candidacy new life? And other thoughts.

Pete Rose.

Hall of Fame.

Here we go again.

I thought this topic was dead, but now that Pete has died, his ever-controversial Hall of Fame candidacy has new life, thanks to the President of the United States and Major League Baseball’s commissioner.

Everyone agrees that Rose was a Hall of Fame ballplayer. He compiled 4,256 hits, more than anybody. He was National League MVP, a three-time World Series champ, and started All-Star Games at five positions.

However, as most of you know, baseball has a specific character clause regarding Hall of Fame credentials. Some cheaters, criminals, and ne’er-do-wells have been denied Cooperstown or delayed entry for a variety of transgressions, on and off the field.

Pro football’s Hall largely doesn’t care about this kind of thing. The late O.J. Simpson is in the Pro Football Hall of Fame.

DHL Dan CCXLIII - Taking Stock

When you have nothing to write about, write about everything instead!

Taking stock of Boston’s big four professional sports franchises, and other thoughts

Picked-up pieces while taking stock of our traditional big four professional franchises …

Bruins: Spoked-B Nation is restless. Everything Brother Dupont has been telling you is true. The local skaters might not make the playoffs for the first time since 2016, Cam Neely and Don Sweeney are on hot seats, and there’s a possibility that captain Brad Marchand could be traded between now and the March 7 deadline.

Dealing the Lil’ Ball O’ Hate wouldn’t rise to the level of dealing Ray Bourque to Colorado (2000), but would flood the secondary sweater market with a few thousand Black and Gold No. 63 jerseys.

Marchand has been a Bruin since the 2009-10 season. He is the last member of the Boston’s 2011 Stanley Cup champs still skating at the Garden. He’s a top-10 all-time Bruin in games, goals, and assists. He’s the captain. Will the Bruins deal him to build for the future, the way the Celtics dealt aging Paul Pierce and Kevin Garnett to the Nets in 2013 to set the table for a championship run that we’re still enjoying today?

Read on, if you want to read Shank dumping on Patriots owner Robert Kraft yet again...

Hail To The Chief!

It's been a while since we heard from Boston Celtics legend Robert Parish, and it's not entirely positive:

Decades later, Robert Parish reveals in Celtics doc why he chose to sit out Larry Bird’s legendary fight with Dr. J

There’s new information on a very old Boston sports moment.

Celtics Hall of Fame center Robert Parish is acknowledging he harbored bad feelings toward legendary teammate Larry Bird, and demonstrated his disappointment by letting Bird take a beating in a landmark brawl with Julius Erving and the Philadelphia 76ers during a regular-season game at the Old Garden way back in November 1984.

“This is the first time anybody’s hearing this,” Parish says in a new HBO documentary on the Celtics (first episode airs next Monday). “This was the only time that I didn’t feel a closeness to Larry . . . [because] after I was beefing about contracts with the Celtics [in 1983], to be honest, Larry didn’t support me.”

Who cares? Why give fresh air to this old topic now?

Because this is Boston and this is Larry Bird and everything from back then still matters now. The Chief’s somewhat distant relationship with his starry teammates has always been mysterious. Parish snubbed the team-sponsored reunion of the 1985-86 Celtics in 2016 and has been scarce around TD Garden since retiring.

Well, now it's out in the open, for better or worse...

DHL Dan CCXLII - The Fab Four? Really?

It's been a while since Shank dropped a Beatles comparison on us. Let's see how that's going to work out:

‘Boston’s Baseball Beatles’ are sure to be the talk of spring training for the next month, and other thoughts

FORT MYERS, Fla. — Picked-up pieces after nine days at Fenway South . . .

▪ Roman Anthony, Kristian Campbell, Marcelo Mayer . . . John Lennon, Paul McCartney, George Harrison.

Hot-shot prospects Anthony, Campbell, and Mayer are Boston’s Baseball Beatles. They are the The Fab Three (prospect catcher Kyle Teel, the Ringo drummer of this Sox crop, was traded for Garrett Crochet).

All approximately 6 feet 3 inches, all drafted by Chaim Bloom, Anthony, Campbell, and Mayer dress side-by-side-by-side in the Red Sox clubhouse at JetBlue Park. They were together in Portland and Worcester last summer, and here in Fort Myers they walk together to the batting cages almost every day. After workouts and spring games, they go to the beach, watch movies, and eat dinner with one another.

Labeling these guys “highly touted” is an understatement. Anthony, Campbell, and Mayer are three of the top 25 prospects in all of baseball.

Trouble In Paradise?

With the speculation that new acquisition Alex Bregman might play at third base for the Red Sox, let's see how the current third basement feels about it:

Does Rafael Devers have any interest in becoming the Red Sox’ full-time DH? ‘No!’

FORT MYERS, Fla. — We have a legitimate Red Sox spring training controversy. Just like in the good old days of Roger Clemens and Oil Can Boyd.

The Sox want third baseman Rafael Devers to become a designated hitter to make room for prize free agent acquisition Alex Bregman, who’s been a Gold Glove third baseman for the Astros.

And Devers has one word for them . . .

“No.”

Monday at JetBlue Park was one of the wilder spring training days in club history. That’s no small statement for a franchise that gave us general manager Lou Gorman saying, “The sun will rise, the sun will set, and I’ll have lunch,” when MVP Clemens stormed out of camp over a contract squabble . . . or when Oil Can was nearly arrested for overdue adult videos in Winter Haven — an episode that came to be known as “The Can’s Film Festival.”

I'm sure this one will be as good as some of those other ones but as far as a funny name, nothing's topping “The Can’s Film Festival” !

Alex Bregman's Introductory Press Conference

The newest memeber of the Red Sox held a press conference yesterday, and Shank was there to cover it (with a lot of other reporters):

All smiles at Alex Bregman’s Red Sox introduction, even if the feel-good story has flaws

FORT MYERS, Fla. — Everyone said all the right things Sunday morning at JetBlue Park when the Red Sox finally rolled out their new acquisition, $40 million per year man Alex Bregman.

Side-by-side, the Sox presented Bregman’s agent Scott Boras, Bregman himself, Red Sox chief baseball officer Craig Breslow, manager Alex Cora, and team president/mouthpiece Sam Kennedy.

It was so big that NESN delivered it live to snow-bound New Englanders at 8:30 a.m. (must have killed NESN to cut away from “The Mad Fisherman”).

This was so big a number of Sox stars gathered at the back of the tent to listen to their new teammate/leader (not Rafael Devers, who was seen walking by the group, presumably to get to his car).

This was so big we had actual national baseball reporters from ESPN and USA Today present, a first for a team that has faded from relevance since trading Mookie Betts and pivoting to fiscal responsibility five long years ago.

Emphasis on that last point, as it seems even the national reporters are interested in the team again.

DHL Dan CCXLI - More On The Bregman Trade

A day after the surprise signing of Alex Bregman, Shank takes a deeper dive into its impact on the 2025 Red Sox:

Signing of Alex Bregman shows the good old Red Sox are back, and other thoughts

▪ It’s finally fun to follow the Red Sox again.

Just like that.

Imagine.

Can we all pretend the last five seasons never happened? Can we get John Henry and his FSG friends to pledge they’re Never Going Back to the five post-Mookie seasons that tarnished Boston’s baseball brand and tested loyalties of a fan base that justifiably asks ownership to go all-in every season?

Hope so. Red Sox owners are expected to be at JetBlue Park Monday morning for the annual organization meeting on the day of the team’s first full squad workout. There’s no official word from team public relations, but I am expecting the bosses to take a ceremonial victory lap around the warning track.

Former Sox CEO Larry Lucchino died last spring and has not been running the team for a full decade, but Wednesday night’s news on Bregman kindled memories of the hard-charging boss that cared about winning more than anything. Lucchino also enjoyed lively competition with the “Evil Empire,” and the Sox haven’t been the same since he stepped away.

Now it feels like the Bostons are back, perhaps even equipped to challenge the Yankees again.

It’ll be interesting to see how Alex Cora uses his old pal Bregman, a veteran third baseman. The situation reminds me a little of what happened with the Yankees when they acquired Alex Rodriguez in the spring of 2004 (no one is equating Bregman with A-Rod). The logical positioning would have been to move Derek Jeter to third and have A-Rod play short. But the Yanks didn’t want to embarrass their captain, so Jeter stayed at short and A-Rod took up the new position.

Read on for more analysis this trade has on the other positions for the Olde Towne Team, Bill Belichick, and, well, other thoughts.

A Step In The Right Direction

The Boston Red Sox suddenly got a bit more interesting, haven't they?

In signing Alex Bregman, the Red Sox finally did what they said they would — and it changes everything

FORT MYERS, Fla. — Everything is different now. Red Sox Nation’s long nightmare appears to be over. The Local Nine is back in business, spending money just like the old days and trying to win this year.

Life changed for Sox fans late Wednesday when news broke that Boston signed veteran Houston third baseman Alex Bregman to a three-year, $120 million deal.

After a couple of tight-fisted offseasons peppered with broken promises and faux pledges about “urgency,” this was a move Red Sox fans were waiting for. Bregman is a two-time World Series winner, a legitimate clubhouse leader, and a Fenway Park wrecking ball (.375 lifetime).

Anybody have a recording of the late John Kiley playing the “Hallelujah Chorus” on the Fenway Park organ?

Oh, happy day! Red Sox owner John Henry (who also owns the Globe) once again has paid big bucks for the best available righthanded hitter on the market.

Shank's being nice / non-critical of the his boss, the Red Sox owner? Someome's annual review must be right around the corner...

Red Sox Report - Roman Anthony

He's only been down there a few days and it's silly season already:

Roman Anthony has rocketed through the Red Sox farm system. Are the major leagues the next stop?

FORT MYERS, Fla. — Even his name is perfect.

Roman Anthony.

How can a kid miss with a name like that?

It rolls off the tongue and onto your scorecard like Mickey Mantle, Willie Mays, Clint Hurdle, Bombo Rivera, Oil Can Boyd or Roy Hobbs.

The name is regal. Almost fictional. Too good to be true.

Just like the young Red Sox outfielder himself. Twenty-year-old Red Sox phenom Roman Anthony.

Welcome to Boston baseball’s spring training, 2025, where the frugal, suddenly middle-market Red Sox sell the future instead of their dismal, recent past. After some jackpot years picking high in the draft (finishing in last place has its benefits) fruits of Boston’s farm system are maturing and JetBluePark fans this spring will feast on a regular diet of 22-year-old second baseman Kristian Campbell, 22-year-old shortstop Marcelo Mayer, and last year’s No. 1-ranked prospect in all of baseball, Roman Anthony.

I think it's way too early for Shank to compare this kid to names like that, but we'll see.

Live, From Fort Myers

I think I know one reason why Shank goes to nearly every Red Sox spring training:

Spring training is here. Did Craig Breslow follow through on the Red Sox' offseason promises to fans?

FORT MYERS, Fla. — Forty-four-year-old Craig Breslow, the chief baseball officer of the Red Sox, may be the smartest man in baseball.

Here’s what it says about him in the Red Sox media guide:

“Breslow graduated in 2002 from Yale University with a degree in molecular biophysics and biochemistry. He was named the ‘Smartest Man in Baseball’ by the Wall Street Journal in 2009, and in 2010 he ranked No. 1 on The Sporting News list of ‘Top 20 Smartest Athletes.‘ ”

Boston’s baseball boss has fortified his cerebral image with some spellbinding statements in his 18 months on the job. My personal favorite came when the Sox were struggling last summer — playing defense like guys wearing shoes on their hands — and Breslow told the Globe’s Alex Speier: “We have been poor clusterers or sequencers of performance.”

Spring traqining = no snow shoveling!

DHL Dan CCXL - Threat Level Reduced

Super Bowl 59 (or LIX for you fellow Roman Numeral dorks) is on the horizon, Shank says 'fear not, Patriots fans':

No matter what happens on Sunday, the Chiefs are no threat to the Patriots’ dynasty, and other thoughts

Picked-up pieces while at Star Market buying a Super Bowl sheet cake with tiny goal posts . . .

▪ Don’t be threatened, Patriots fans. The Kansas City Chiefs pose no threat to the greatest dynasty in the history of the NFL.

The Chiefs are slight favorites to win their third consecutive Super Bowl Sunday in New Orleans against the Eagles. Not surprisingly, a portion of paranoid and ever-defensive Pats fans (folks still talking about the ideal gas law and “The Wells Report In Context”) fear that a Kansas City victory will somehow tarnish the legacy of the Bill Belichick-Tom Brady Patriots.

Fear not, you footie-pajama-wearing Pats fans.

Taylor Swift or no Taylor Swift, the Chiefs aren’t going to top the Patriots.

Andy Reid will never be better than Bill.

Travis Kelce will never be better than Gronk.

And Patrick Mahomes will never be better than Tom.

It’s all about the numbers.

Keep On Truckin'

As the Boston Red Sox continue to be a team hovering around the .500 line, Shank sees it carry over into something that used to be news worthy:

Much like the Red Sox, Truck Day just isn’t what it used to be

The man was elderly. Older than me, even. He’d emerged from one of the Fenway Park gates on Van Ness Street and as he approached, he asked, “Is this really an event worth covering?”

I chuckled and said something about tradition. When he passed, I turned around and noticed the stenciling on the back of his red windbreaker.

“Red Sox Tours,” it read.

Yeesh. Even team employees know that the expiration date on Red Sox Truck Day has come and gone.

And yet, we soldiered on — myself and several dozen Red Sox diehards — on a balmy February day as the Sox equipment truck was loaded with 20,400 baseballs, 1,100 bats, 200 batting gloves, 200 batting helmets, 320 batting practice tops, 160 white game jerseys, plus family cribs and bikes, and a couple million sunflower seeds that will be needed for eight weeks of spring training in Fort Myers, Fla.

DHL Dan CCXXXIX - All Hail The King!

What is this? A Boston Globe writer, jumping on the Trump Train?

If elected King of Sports, here are my Day 1 decrees, and other thoughts

Picked-up pieces while wondering what the crowd’s going to look like for Monday’s Truck Day festival at Fenway . . .

▪ Pardons and executive orders are all the rage in these early days of 2025. In this spirit, I am here to tell you what I’ll do when elected King of Sports.

On my first day as King of Sports I’ll call the media to my Ovaltine Office — I drink the delicious malt every day — and wave my pen as a ceremonial sword, righting all wrongs and making sports great again.

This revolution of sports common sense no doubt will be controversial, but it’s necessary. We’re going to take our sports back.

Henceforth, I decree:

▪ All postseason baseball games will be played in the afternoon.

▪ From this day forward, there will be only two ways to score points in basketball: Free throws and 2-point field goals. I am eliminating the 3-point shot. End of story.

▪ No more offside in hockey or soccer. Let’s open up these games.

▪ No more analytics departments. The reliance on analytics in sports ends.

▪ No more corruption-ridden “extra time” in soccer. There will be a clock that winds down to 0:00, just like in football, basketball, and hockey.

▪ NFL kickoffs will go back to the good old days when men were men.

▪ The Calipari statue comes down in Amherst.

Is power dangerous in the wrong hands? Just asking!

DHL Dan CCXXXVIII - What Might Have Been

Shank's wondering whether a late season win by the New England Patriots might've shaken up the draft board:

If not for a late-season win in 2023, the Patriots may have drafted playoff hero Jayden Daniels, and other thoughts

Picked-up pieces while praying the pipes don’t freeze …

▪ Three questions on this cold conference championship weekend:

1. Did Bill Belichick and Bailey Zappe inadvertently crush the Patriots on the way out the door when New England beat Denver on Christmas Eve 2023?

2. Had the Patriots drafted second instead of third last spring, would they have selected Drake Maye over Jayden Daniels?

3. At this hour, would Patriots fans rather have Daniels than Maye?

The performance of Daniels in these playoffs coupled with the nonstop news spilling out of Foxborough has me wondering how we’re going to be feeling 15-20 years from now when the dossiers of Daniels and Maye are complete.

Maye certainly made a strong showing in his limited time as New England’s starting quarterback in 2024. Surrounded by the worst roster in the NFL, he demonstrated good pocket poise, completed 67 percent of his passes, and averaged 7.8 yards when he ran. He didn’t start until Week 6 in Houston, and wound up throwing 15 touchdown passes with 10 interceptions while being sacked 34 times.

Comparison Made

Leading up to the Super Bowl gives us many columns about one or both teams that'll be playing next Sunday night. Shank sets his sights on the Kansas City Chiefs and makes a comparison of them with... the New England Patriots!

These Chiefs will never be the Patriots, but it’s time for New England to embrace their modern-day dominance

Don’t fight it any longer, New England.

It’s time to adopt the Kansas City Chiefs.

They are you as you are they and you are me and we are all together. Kansas City’s coach, Andy Reid, is “The Walrus.”

There’s a lot of regional and national negativity directed at the Chiefs. Fans outside of Kansas City largely hate them. They win too much. They are always programmed in coveted prime-time slots. They get all the calls from the officials. They have an ever-clutch quarterback who’s constantly on TV selling us something. They are invariably lucky.

Sound like any team you loved from 2001-19?

Face it, Pats fans. Aside from the cheating and the paranoia, today’s Kansas City Chiefs are your New England Patriots in the first 18 years of this century.

DHL Dan CCXXXVII - Staying In The Past

Kind of sensing a theme with these last two columns...

It’s still weird, five seasons post-Brady, to be on the outside looking in during NFL playoffs, and other thoughts

Picked-up pieces while reminding myself that nobody knows anything when it comes to betting on the NFL playoffs …

▪ Five seasons into our post-Brady world, it’s still weird to be on the outside looking in during the NFL’s biggest weekends of the year.

I still have flashbacks of walking across the sprawling acres surrounding Arrowhead Stadium en route to the AFC Championship game in January 2019. Eyeballing thousands of festive/frozen Heartland fans, many barbecuing ribs and blissfully boasting about how they were going to beat the Patriots, I remember thinking, “Poor dopes and losers. These people have no idea what they’re in for. They think they’re Super Bowl-bound, but they don’t stand a chance. Something hideous will happen to their team at the end of this game and the Pats will prevail.”

Sure enough, that’s how it went. What appeared to be a game-losing Tom Brady interception in the final minute of regulation was negated because Chiefs pass rusher Dee Ford lined up offside. Ford’s transgression had no bearing on the turnover, but it gave the Patriots the ball back. Naturally, Brady tied the game, then won it in overtime when … you guessed it … the Chiefs lost the coin flip and never touched the football.

Read on for unsurprising digs at - you guessed it - Robert Kraft. Talk about never letting go!

Where Past Is Prologue

Shank has a few thoughts about the New England Patriots new head coach, and dates himself in the process:

Mike Vrabel is another former Patriot, but now they need to let go of the past and let him truly run the show

I love the past and am not an agent of change.

Just like the Patriots.

I have a land line in my 125-year-old house. Also a VCR, CD player, Rolodex, and weekly calendar where I scribble appointments and to-do lists. I have never Tik-Toked, still carry cash, and own shoes older than Globe Patriots beat reporter Nicole Yang.

I read printed newspapers, seven per day, and Monday those ink-stained rags featured these headlines:

“No surprise, Patriots turn to their past and hire Vrabel as next head coach,” The New York Post

“Vrabel is Returning to New England as Patriots Head Coach,” The New York Times

“Glory daze,” The Boston Globe

Beautiful. The Patriots love the past. They can’t let it go. They love anything and everything that reminds them of their great triumphs in the first two decades of this century.

The Patriots aren't the only ones that can't let things go...

DHL Dan CCXXXVI - On To The Offseason

Shank's weekly column features an unusual admission:

The real season — the offseason — is finally here for the Patriots, and other thoughts

Picked-up pieces while crediting Bob Kraft for having the smarts and fortitude to take questions from the media when there’s a lot to explain about his team . . .

▪ Mid-winter has emerged as the most important season for the Patriots.

For the first 20 years of this century, New England football’s January/February was about Saturday night home playoff games, Tuck Rules, snow angels, Tom Brady comebacks, Lombardi Trophies, cheating scandals, paths to perfection, revenge tours, sore losers in Pittsburgh and Indianapolis, Mona Lisa Vito, “Malcolm, go!,” 28-3, and The Continuing Story of Bill and Ernie.

All of that is gone, but these freezing, post-holiday weeks with no playoffs for us still represent the most important stretch of the season.

In 2025, the Patriots are annual NFL losers. Those 13 regular-season losses and four feeble wins mean just about nothing. Almost all the games were tedious and unmemorable.

Sincere praise for Kraft or a huge head fake by Shank? You make the call!

If You're Not First, You're Last

Here's Shank on the firing of New England Patriots head coach Jerod Mayo:

In Jerod Mayo’s case, nice guys really do finish last

Weep not for nice guy Jerod Mayo. This wasn’t his fault.

Smart, sensible, stoic, Mayo will be a coveted commodity for many decades as an NFL assistant coach, commentator, or just about anything he pursues. He may become an NFL head coach again, perhaps a good one. He is only 38 and it’s all ahead of him.

Mayo was fired as head coach of the Patriots, less than two hours after the hapless Patriots beat the playoff-bound Buffalo Bills, 23-16, in New England’s season-finale “Stupor Bowl” at Gillette Stadium Sunday afternoon.

It was a “win” that cost the Patriots dearly, dropping them from first to fourth in the NFL’s annual April meat market. The hollow victory supplied the perfect coda for Mayo’s disastrous single season as Patriot head coach:

The 2024 Patriots: even when they win, they lose.

It’s fair to state that Mayo’s disastrous one-year reign was an ownership blunder, residue of Bob Kraft’s considerable hubris and pain from the final years of Bill Belichick’s quarter-century at the helm. Mayo should never have been handed the job in the first place and likely was promoted out of sheer loyalty to the boss. After 25 years of perceived disrespect from Belichick, Kraft wanted a head coach who was polite and beholden to the boss. The result was abysmal. Mayo was wildly inexperienced and unprepared for the lofty position.

Another Patriots column for which the real primary target is Bob Kraft.

Losing By Winning

If it weren't for the fact there's always a losing team, Shank would have nothing to write about.

One of the best comments ever at Dan Shaughnessy Watch, and the theme of Shank's second column from Sunday:

Patriots lose big (No. 1 NFL Draft pick), even in victory

Say it loud and say it proud. Print bumper stickers and T-shirts.

The 2024 Jerod Mayo Patriots: Even when they win, they lose.

Through the decades, we’ve seen some unforgettable teams here in Greater Boston.

The 1967 Red Sox were the “Cardiac Kids,” who forged “The Impossible Dream.” Our Causeway Street skaters of the 1970s were the Big Bad Bruins, who later ceded to “The Lunchpail A.C.” We had the “Cowboy Up” Red Sox of 2003, and the Curse-bustin “Why Not Us?” Sox of ‘04. Kevin Garnett led the “Ubuntu” Celtics to the NBA Championship in 2008.

Now we have the ‘24 Patriots who gave us a 17-game clown show festooned with turnovers, pre-snap penalties, and embarrassing losses from September though the holidays. Going into Sunday’s season finale, their 3-13 record put them in dandy position for the No. 1 pick in the entire NFL draft. All they had to do to secure the top spot was lose to a 13-3, playoff-bound Buffalo Bills team.

DHL Dan CCXXXV - The Axe Falleth?

Just an hour before Patriots head coach Jerod Mayo became former Patriots head coach Jerod Mayo, Shank was thinking ownership will do nothing:

The Patriots need to do right by their fans and fire Jerod Mayo, and other thoughts

Picked-up pieces while wondering if Route 1 will be easy to navigate Sunday . . .

▪ Welcome to the Stupor Bowl. Sunday in Foxborough we get the 13-3 Buffalo Bills, a playoff-bound team with absolutely nothing to gain against a 3-13 Patriots team that has much to lose by winning.

Ugh. Wake me when it’s over.

When this finale mercifully concludes, Bob and Jonathan Kraft — visible this season only when network pals featured them rattling jewelry from a cozy midfield suite — need to do right by fans and fix their mess of a football team.

Regrettably, I can pretty much guess how this is going to go: Bob will send out his now-annual letter of apology, telling fans they deserve better and promising a better product. The Krafts will feebly fire a coordinator or two, Bob will reluctantly take a few questions, and announce that Jonathan is busy elsewhere at a very important corrugated cardboard meeting.

I'm getting the feeling Shank doesn't like the Kraft family a whole lot...

Time To Catch Up?

Sorry, folks - took a bit of a break from Shank, as we all need to do from time to time...

Let's start from a few weeks ago, when Shank correctly pointts out the half-assed effort by the Red Sox to go after free agents again this offseason:

Red Sox have struck out on big-name talent, but they rule one aspect of free agency: They’re kings of interest

Last winter, Red Sox chairman Tom Werner gave us a punchline for the ages when he pledged that the Sox would go “full throttle” after their last-place finish of 2023.

We all know how that worked out. The Sox were a virtual Paul Cézanne still life in the winter of 2023-24, unless you want to count trading 2024 Cy Young winner Chris Sale to the Braves for a bin of rosin bags, and signing Lucas Giolito, who got hurt in Fort Myers and didn’t throw a pitch all season.

This winter is different. Sort of.

The Sox have indeed added some name players (Aroldis Chapman, Walker Buehler, Garrett Crochet), but they’re still tire-kickers on the free agent market, ever MLB’s “Kings of Interest,” and no longer serious players for big-name talents seeking multiyear deals.