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Friday, January 20, 2006

The Prodigal Son Returns, and Sybil Ain't Happy

The CHB is one pissed-off dude this morning. Clearly the CHB read the predictions in this space last night, then did exactly the opposite.

On Nov. 9, the CHB proposed that the Sox and Epstein reconcile: "The Red Sox should offer the job to Brookline native Theo Epstein." In the same column, he wrote: "The Red Sox are looking for a general manager and he's clearly the best man for the job."

Now that the prodigal son has returned, however, Sybil's working overtime. Today he calls Epstein a "cutthroat politician," "immature" and "duplicitous." Writes Dan: "[H]e undermined the credibility of the entire Boston front office by straddling the fence regarding his place in the organization."

This is too good.

Again, no doubt in response to what was written here last night, he plays up what he considers to be inside information, claiming: "At 7:13 p.m., I got an e-mail from Henry that read, 'I want to give you a heads up that we are going to make an announcement tonight.' " Somehow, I bet every media person in Boston was cc'd on that one.

Indeed, in Chris Snow's story today, he says Boston owner John Henry told him of Epstein's imminent return yesterday morning: "[I]n an interview with the Globe yesterday prior to the team's formal announcement, acknowledged Epstein would be coming back ..." How's it feel to be scooped by a rookie (again), Dan?

Why all the ire? We can't help but recall what Dan wrote on Nov. 18: "They obviously waited too long to negotiate with Theo and now they look like George McGovern trying to find a running mate in 1972." That now smacks of Dan was trying to cover his tracks after the Dirty Laundry column. Far from being a happy camper now that Epstein is coming back, we suspect Dan will be frozen out of Fenway ongoings like Michael Jordan in the 1985 All-Star Game.

Dan lays it on really thick at the end: "So Theo is back, and maybe he never really left. But damage has been done inside the walls of old Fenway."

Damage to whom? The team, which has added a top-of-the-rotation starting pitcher, some serious bullpen help, a starting second baseman, and rid itself of an ineffective shortstop? The fans, who are so upset that they went out and bought up an entire season's worth of tickets? Management, about whom nobody in Boston cares except their families and bankers?

And here we believed him when he told ESPN, "I always say I look at the bright side." Silly us.

Looks like the good times are coming to an end, Dan. Better brush up on your hockey trivia. Here's a hint: the local team is the Bruins.

Bill Clinton watch: "For the record, this 17 percent cartel correspondent has not spoken with Lucchino, Epstein, or Dr. Charles Steinberg since before Christmas." But "spoken with" doesn't include emailing, does it Dan-o? Sneaky.

8 comments:

  1. Bravo. Good to see someone is dedicated to finding truth out there. Keep up the good work, and down with Dan.

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  2. //Now that Epstein is coming back, we suspect Dan will be frozen out of Fenway ongoings like Michael Jordan in the 1985 All-Star Game.//

    Oh good lord, do we dare hope?

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  3. Frozen out? Like that's stopped him before. Like that stopped him today?

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  4. I don't think it will stop him, Shawn. Stopping him might take his son running into a couple of guys named Rocko and Bruno in a dark alley.

    But at least he can't fall back on his suggestions of inner office sourcing, not after a cub reporter at his own paper beats him to the story by a country mile.

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  5. I'm from Georgia and don't really care much about Boston sports, but I stumbled onto this site looking for info on Dan, and I'm now hooked.

    How long has this guy been doing his column? He doesn't look that old, but I've been seeing him on ESPN forever--you know, specials about Bill Buckner or Larry Bird, where they want to inject some local flavor. So anyways, with those curly locks and that huge surname taking up the whole screen, even us bumpkins down here know who he is. I'm gonna start reading him now so I can appreciate this blog more.

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  6. See, here's the thing from my perspective:

    I didn't read Shaughnessy today.

    I didn't read the Globe today.

    I didn't read the Globe before or after the Patriots playoff games either.

    There is nothing worth reading in the Globe anymore.

    I can get the news from other news sources, whether it is the other local papers or any of the big online sites.

    If I want opinions, there are a ton of blogs with fresher opinions than the stale crap the Globe insists on shoving down our throats.

    You know what the Globe's columnists are going to say every time out:

    Shaughnessy: The sky is falling in Red Sox nation!!!!

    Dupont: It is all Joe Thornton's fault!!! Let me blow Mike O'Connell wet little kisses!!!

    Borges: The Patriots are the worst franchise in sports history!!!! I have no sources left since Will McDonough died!!!

    And the only people whose opinions you might actually want to hear from, Ryan and MacMullan, never seem to be writing about whatever the pressing issue is on any day. (Or maybe they have too much integrity to play the Globe Red Sox pom-pom waving game. If so, good for them).

    Why even bother wasting your time with them anymore? People all over Boston are deciding they can do without the Globe and aren't missing anything even slightly important from their lives.

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  7. I always wanted an authentic Red Sox jersey, but either couldn't afford it or couldn't justify the expense. Finally, at around the age of thirty, I sprung for one, and was quite happy to finally own one. Shortly afterwards, Dan ridiculed adults who wear Sox jerseys in a column. He thought it was childish, I guess. It really killed my buzz. But then I thought of his haircut, which is adolescent, at best, and realized that perhaps he shouldn't be throwing stones. At least I don't wear the jersey every day. I've since noticed that insulting his readership and Red Sox fandom in general is a hallmark of his writing. Pretty classy. In any event, I just stumbled across your site and I appreciate the fine public service you are performing.

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  8. I particularly enjoyed his line describing Luccino as the "pinata CEO" thereby framing Luccino as the victim in the whole thing.

    and regarding an above comment:

    "I'm gonna start reading him now so I can appreciate this blog more"

    This is like a scientist who invents a source of incredible power to save the earth and then if horrified to find out all anyone uses it for is to make superbombs.

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