Just Buy A Restaurant, Shank...

That way you'll be able to stir as many pots as you want at the same time!

Not content with declaring Jonathan Papelbon gone at year's end, or dredging up John Lackey's 14-11 record last year, Shank now aims his cross hairs at Josh Beckett, in a rather disingenuous fashion:

FORT MYERS, Fla. — Not to heap any additional pressure on the man,

Shank is just so full of shit, isn't he?

but Josh Beckett stands to be the most important Red Sox player as we look toward this season of great expectations.

Now, onward - to flunk his own logic test:

Sure, Kevin Youkilis is the soul of the Sox. Dustin Pedroia has been an MVP. Adrian Gonzalez could be the answer to Mark Teixeira. Carl Crawford brings new dimensions. Jacoby Ellsbury (would it have killed him to come here a couple of days early?) can be a star. Jon Lester is one of the best pitchers in baseball. Jonathan Papelbon hopes to return to his old dominant self.

So, Beckett's more important to the Red Sox this year than five everyday players, last year's ace, and your closer? And finally, a shot at Ellsbury. Shank's not disappointing so far. He hangs part of last season's woes on Becket before finally mentioning things Beckett did during the offseason to rectify things, then finally looks at the new year.

It’s Feb. 16 and Epstein is talking about an elite rotation and Beckett is talking about 100 wins. Don’t you just love spring training?

This is a textbook Shank passive / aggressive column.